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(16 Posts)
molesworth2 Wed 28-Jan-15 15:48:24

AIBU to think my daughter's teacher should have intervened rather than expecting me to? I noticed a kerfuffle in the school line at home time coming out of my daughter's class between my daughter and another girl. My daughter was in tears and told me that she had lent the girl one of her belongings but the other girl was refusing to give it back. As my daughter was so upset I decided to tell the teacher and perhaps ask her to have a word tomorrow in case there was an ongoing issue there - my daughter has been bullied in the past. To my amazement she refused and told me to go and "chase after the parent" as it was too windy for her to stay outside. AIBU unreasonable to expect her to intervene rather than me - particularly as I don't know the child or their parents and would feel very odd tugging on their sleeve at home time. Surely this is something that's better sorted out in the classroom?

ohbollocks2u Wed 28-Jan-15 16:06:05

Really ?

They usually prefer to deal with things in school

molesworth2 Wed 28-Jan-15 16:08:48

Well, it did surprise me. TBH have been a bit hmm about this teacher for a while now...

BlinkAndMiss Wed 28-Jan-15 16:09:43

Well it was home time and you and the other parent were both there, I think you should have sorted it out with the other parent. At this point it doesn't have anything to do with the teacher, she can hardly get in the middle of a dispute between you and the other parent. If it continues into school tomorrow then she should step in then, but not before.

captainfarrell Wed 28-Jan-15 16:14:10

You ANBU. If it happened in school time, teacher should sort it.

molesworth2 Wed 28-Jan-15 16:14:53

That was exactly why I asked her to have a word tomorrow Blinkandmiss - also the other child had disappeared home by this time.

Caronaim Wed 28-Jan-15 16:15:38

it was after school and in the presence of the parents. Nothing to do with the teachers.

morethanpotatoprints Wed 28-Jan-15 16:17:11

This would have been the case in all the schools my dc attended too.
i'm not saying its right, but maybe the teachers get fed up sorting out borrowed belongings, it can get petty. Maybe the teacher had more important things to do.

captainfarrell Wed 28-Jan-15 16:17:27

Too windy to stay outside? What does that say about her? If you approach a parent and accuse her child of stealing it might not go down well but the teacher can do it in a different way. If the item was taken in school time. teacher should intervene. If she can't get to bottom of it, she should speak to both parents at the end of the day.

captainfarrell Wed 28-Jan-15 16:18:58

If it happened after school it's a parent matter but OP said it happened while children were lining up.

PtolemysNeedle Wed 28-Jan-15 16:19:33

Maybe the teacher misunderstood and thought you were expecting her to get your dds thing back there and then.

molesworth2 Wed 28-Jan-15 16:21:26

I know it's a grey line but isn't it school time when they're all lining up to leave as well?

molesworth2 Wed 28-Jan-15 16:22:48

Thank you captainfarrell - I agree. This is about modelling good behaviour surely? Taking someone's belongings, petty or no, is out of line and not something to be tolerated. Added to that, surely schools don't want to encourage confrontations in the playground? Embarrassing for all concerned I would have thought.

captainfarrell Wed 28-Jan-15 16:38:36

Yes I agree. I'd get to the bottom of when and where item was borrowed. Explain this to teacher in the morning and ask if she could or get her TA to have a chat with both girls. I'm a TA and deal with this type of thing regularly so that the teacher can get on with teaching. It's still important though as stealing should not be tolerated in school.

steppeinginto2015 Wed 28-Jan-15 16:44:06

until the children are handed to parents it is school time.

So item taken in school, kerfuffle in line, tears in line, then handover

very clearly in school time and teacher should sort it.

Scholes34 Wed 28-Jan-15 17:15:39

All depends on what the item was. If it was something from a pencil case, something you're expected to have with you, then fair enough for the teacher/TA to have a word. If it was a toy, then you need to speak to your DD about not taking things like that into school. You can't expect the school staff to intervene on such matters unless it's a more serious sustained bullying incident.

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