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Mums offer to make sandwiches for DS's party?

(24 Posts)
QTPie Sun 18-Jan-15 16:33:45

DS's party next weekend.

My mum has very kindly offered to make the sandwiches for the party and bring them along.

Initially I thought "oh good, that will help), but I have two concerns;
- firstly she is a heavy smoker (probably at least 20 a day) and everything that comes out of her house (including us) smells of stake smoke. Am worried this May effect the sandwiches.
- secondly, although she seems to be responding well to recent medication changes, she has dreadful IBS. This can make her very unreliable, understandably (awful pain, stuck to the bathroom). So it is not at all beyond the bounds of possibility that she could phone up Sat night/sun morning saying that she can't make it (and I will be in a panic trying to get bread - on a Sunday - and make sandwiches for the noon start of the party....

AIBU to decline her very kind offer on the grounds of "thank you very much - very kind offer - but I have already bought the ham and cheese to go in them" (she lives about an hour away - so not close enough to pop round and pick them up...)?

clary Sun 18-Jan-15 16:36:21

I wouldn't bother with sandwiches anyway. Unless you have masses of kids coming.

How old are the children? My experience tells me that you need about one quarter cheese spread white bread sandwich per child.

Much better idea - ask her to bring packets of crisps and party rings - she can't adulterate them with smoke smile

maddy68 Sun 18-Jan-15 16:37:42

Just say some of the guests have allergies so you are going to do them as its over complicated

maddy68 Sun 18-Jan-15 16:38:11

But ask her to buy a cake so she feels involved

NotOnMyWatchOhNo Sun 18-Jan-15 16:38:55

You can buy bread on a Sunday.

LadyLuck10 Sun 18-Jan-15 16:39:04

Yanbu, I would also ask her to bring the chips, sweets or something along those lines which is sealed. Tell her you've got the sanwiches sorted already.

MrsCakesPrecognition Sun 18-Jan-15 16:39:19

Children usually avoid the sandwiches. Let your mum make them, have plenty of alternatives too. If they arrive then fab, if not then it won't be the end of the world.

Lifesalemon Sun 18-Jan-15 16:41:45

Could you just invite her to yours for the morning with the plan that you do the shopping beforehand and that you make the sandwiches together and then if she is unable to come at least you will have all the stuff there ready.

EvansOvalPiesYumYum Sun 18-Jan-15 16:41:50

You can also make ahead and freeze certain sandwiches - ham, cheese, Marmite, for instance. Might be worth considering.

derenstar Sun 18-Jan-15 16:48:36

Yeah, don't bother with the sandwiches, they always get thrown out.I second telling her you have it covered and ask her to get things in sealed packs.

PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange Sun 18-Jan-15 17:08:58

The sandwich are the first to go at my family parties.

Why not suggest she does the sandwich at your house.

Vivacia Sun 18-Jan-15 17:15:57

Chips? confused

I agree with either asking her to come 'round to your house to help with the sandwiches, or could she bring packets of X and Y.

Purplehonesty Sun 18-Jan-15 17:22:31

Crisps are chips in the US....

QTPie Sun 18-Jan-15 17:30:46

23 children at the party - some definitely do eat sandwiches (bug have learnt from last year and won't make NEARLY as many!).

I am an ultra organised person and have basically got EVERYTHING apart from the fresh stuff (already got crisps, biscuits, cakes, drinks etcetc).

I think that you are right - invite her here to do it: then, if her IBS does a nasty turn, I have everything here to make them myself anyway. My concern with "bread on a Sunday" would be if I couldn't get into a shop/supermarket before 10am (since I need to be at the venue, setting up, at about 11.30 - all food needs to be prepared at home before we go). Don't want a mad rush...

bimbobaggins Sun 18-Jan-15 17:37:31

I would suggest she makes the sanwiches at your house. My mum is the same . Smokes about 20 per day and everything that comes out of her house is absolutely stinking of smoke.
She smokes in the kitchen when she is cooking the dinner and when i complain she moans about it. She has given me cakes she has made while smoking over them and they taste of smoke. Its disgusting.
You only need to be in the house for half an hour and your clothes are stinking of it.

QTPie Sun 18-Jan-15 17:48:46

Yes, Bimbo, ditto.

Never noticed it growing up (both mum and dad were heavy smokers), but very obvious now... In fact it used to make me retch during pregnancy and that hasn't worn off (5 years later...) sad.

There was the hope that she might have stayed off the cigarettes after having lung cancer (now 4 years clear smile ), but she only stayed off it for 3 months after they removed half of her right lung and some lymph nodes sad

bimbobaggins Tue 20-Jan-15 19:51:23

I agree QTPie! I never noticedd it either growing up but i think that is partly to do with every relative i had smoked so we were never really smoke free to notice what it was like if that makes sense.
Its only when i have grown up and left home that i became more aware of it.

My mother has also had cancer and my sister is a radiotherapist so you would think that would be enough to put her off but no, she says she loves it and its one of her pleasures in life.

MrsTawdry Tue 20-Jan-15 19:54:43

Why would you panic about getting bread? confused Just buy some...and filling and make them. A platter of simple sandwiches takes 15 minutes! Hardly a strain.

MrsTawdry Tue 20-Jan-15 19:55:38

Vivacia I assume LadyLuck is Aussie or American.

PesoPenguin Tue 20-Jan-15 20:41:17

if she can't make it to yours in the morning, could you give her one type of sandwiches to do and you do another, eg, "oh yes please, you do the ham, I'll do the cheese."

MomOfTwoGirls2 Tue 20-Jan-15 20:45:11

Fresh sliced bread freezes really well. Take the bread out of freezer an hour or do before you need it.

bialystockandbloom Tue 20-Jan-15 20:49:34

Yanbu about the worry of her not being able to make them at short notice, but the smoking - seriously? I have smoked and not smoked in my life and as an ex- and non- smoker realise the smell is awful, and stays on clothes etc, but how can it possibly affect the taste of food?! Unless you think she's going to flick ash on the sandwiches?

EvansOvalPiesYumYum Tue 20-Jan-15 20:55:18

Fresh sliced bread freezes really well. Take the bread out of freezer an hour or do before you need it.

Indeed it does. I did suggest a couple of days ago that you can actually pre-make and freeze sandwiches with certain fillings, but it appears to have gone unnoticed. Make them, freeze them and take them out of the freezer an hour or so before you need them.

MrsCakesPrecognition Tue 20-Jan-15 23:03:21

Butter the bread before it defrosts. It is much easier to spread butter on the hard bread as the bread doesn't tear.

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