Well no, IANBU because its true.
I am 44 years old, mother to two DD's one is 24 left home and we don't see each other much. DD2 is 9yo.
I work as a cleaner in a place where i started with a different job (higher level) and left for university post grad. The person who took the cleaning job over from me was given the job that i started there doing, even though it was only a part-time job while i was at uni. I am the most highly qualified person in the company and i clean the floors, my boss thinks this is hysterical.
I have had a few jobs but short lived since DD was born, most of them voluntary, specific to my stupidly specialised qualification and the chances of them leading to paid work - zero. Usefulness on CV? Zero
Now have a "role" in the PTA and am enjoying it but still it brings in no money, all the stress of bringing in money falls on my DP. Our mortgage is too expensive but we can't downsize unless we move into a tent really.
DP is (as is often the case) just now working for a woman who has done really well and he often regales me about her unusual, stressful and highly paid job. It makes me feel like shit, he must look at me and thing, wtf have i got stuck with, im overweight, i have one bra that is falling to bits and im blessed in that department so its not comfy, but the money i earn on my cleaning job is to enable DD2s specialist tuition as she has a SEN.
I hate what I have become and i can't see a way out of it.
I tried a "proper" job but it lead to a breakdown and two years later im still on AD's. People tell me it wasn't my fault, lack of training, bla bla bla, but other people manage stressful jobs.
Where did i go wrong?
AIBU?
To feel like such a failure
lemisscared · 01/11/2014 11:45
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