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AIBU?

What do your teens do when they get home from school?

69 replies

sandyballs · 28/03/2014 16:08

My 13 year olds have just walked in, moaned that there is nothing in the fridge, asking if we are poor as everyone else has loads of goodies constantly on tap to eat.

One of them then moaned about a day out we have planned for tom, saying she prob wasn't coming with us. Another moan about school, whilst making piles of toast.

They are now plonked on the sofa on their ipads. Any conversation I try to initiate is answered by one word, if at all, and I've been accused of going on and on and hassling them, just because I'm showing an interest in their school day.

I know this is all reasonably normal at their age, but just felt a bit wistful about the days they'd rush home and we'd go to the park or to get an ice cream, or to visit nana, and they'd chatter non stop. Although thinking about it I probably moaned about that. Sad.

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BlackholesAndRevelations · 28/03/2014 16:10

Yet another reminder to enjoy my 4, 2 and three month old children before they turn into teenagers whose style I totally cramp! Bless you Flowers

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shakinstevenslovechild · 28/03/2014 16:11

My 13yo comes in, I go to hug him, he dives out of the way, I ask how his day was, he says fine, I ask what he did at school, he shrugs, he gets something to eat, goes upstairs, gets changed, asks if he can go out, I ask where, he says 'the usual' I ask who with, he says 'the usual' I tell him to be back for tea, he shouts 'Love you' and slams the door.... every single day Grin

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QueenofallIsee · 28/03/2014 16:13

Throws herself through the door, uses loo as she inherited my nervous bladder/bowel and can only go at home, stuffs her face on cheese and crackers, complains about how rough her lot is (usually at me when I am trying to work) and then does her homework.

Not a bad old stick really

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BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 28/03/2014 16:14

My 11 yo comes in, chucks his stuff on the living room floor, asks whats for tea, asks what we are doing tonight then asks if he can go on his x box! That's pretty much it........I may get a cuddle in amongst that lot though :)

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UC · 28/03/2014 16:15

13 year old here came home, plonked in front of TV on his phone. He did say he "might" go to the gym, but no sign of that yet.....

We get accused of hassling too, just for asking in general about things.

10 year old out playing at the park with his friends. Bit of a difference...

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Bowlersarm · 28/03/2014 16:18

Similar in my house. They are lovely and friendly, and don't moan too much, but ear phones on and laptops pretty much as soon as they come In. They don't get home until 6.00ish though, so at least they don't have hours and hours and hours in the evening with eyes fixed on screen.

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ThreeBeeOneGee · 28/03/2014 16:19
  1. Leaves his schoolbag just inside the front door for everyone to trip over.
  2. Complains about being physically & mentally exhausted.
  3. Gets irritated with his siblings.
  4. Makes me a cup of tea.
  5. Does his homework.
  6. Goes to bed for an hour.
  7. Sometimes makes dinner.
  8. Watches TV for a bit.
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trashcanjunkie · 28/03/2014 16:20

I have a 17 year old and twins who are nine. I've basically sussed that 90% of the time they want you to be there, floating about in the background, and emotionally available. I make sure there's some quick fix grub to scoff immediately after school, as they have a blood sugar dip, and then leave them to it. If I want meaningful conversation, I will start it just before bedtime - they are extremely forthcoming at that point in the evening Grin little nobheads Grin

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flipchart · 28/03/2014 16:20

Walks in, shouts 'Hi, have you had a good day' Opens the fridge. Gets a drink of milk.
Goes for a poo for ages!!
Has a shower
Gets changed, out with his mates or sports training depending on night.
Does homework
snuggles up to watch the 10 o'clock news
Goes to bed.

So predictable!

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flipchart · 28/03/2014 16:20

I forgot about having tea!

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ThreeBeeOneGee · 28/03/2014 16:21

Twelve year old:

  1. Has a shower.
  2. Practises clarinet.
  3. Does homework.
  4. Packs bag for next day.
  5. Goes on Minecraft until dinner.
  6. Goes on Minecraft again.
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TheBigBumTheory · 28/03/2014 16:22

They have a cup of tea and a biscuit, chat a bit about their day, then they retreat to their rooms until dinner.

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sandyballs · 28/03/2014 16:23

They're good girls, I just feel we've lost the closeness we once had. They have lots of friends and belong to Guides, a football team, netball team, so they're busy and sociable, they aren't always on screens, but when they're home that is their main interest.

At least a couple of evenings a week I'll insist they switch them off and we choose a film together or watch tv, or even play a game, but it is getting harder and harder to do that, they're not as keen.

DT1 did have a good suggestion last night though about the whole family playing badminton together a couple of evenings a week. I'll look into that.

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blanchedeveraux · 28/03/2014 16:24

My 13 yo is addicted to his mini IPad. Lots of Instagramming, Face Time and something else that begins with an "O" (Ouvu???) that's like Face Time but in a group. I feel like such a gimmer with these things, I really do.

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sandyballs · 28/03/2014 16:24

Good to see there is a familiar pattern emerging here Grin.

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blanchedeveraux · 28/03/2014 16:25

...oh, the first thing he has to do though is WASH HIS FEET! Honestly, the smell..

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FreckledLeopard · 28/03/2014 16:28

Comes home. Eats anything she can get her hands on. Arranges food around her whilst sitting on sofa watching TV. Does homework whilst watching TV. Scatters crumbs across sofa. Leaves wrappers and drinks can next to sofa. Goes on Skype, spends hours talking to her friends. Moans bitterly if I ask her to clear assorted crap from sofa. Lounges around until I turf her upstairs to get ready for bed. Watches more crap on YouTube. Sleeps.

She's 13.

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badasahatter · 28/03/2014 16:32

My girl, 13, comes in and goes up to her bedroom. She does her homework, she tidies her room or she texts her friends. At around 6pm, she comes downstairs and mumbles 'what's for tea?' Once she's eaten, she watches Dance Moms and then goes to bed straight after.

I'd like to complain about it, but she does everything I ask her to do. Her homework is self directed and always completed on time and to a decent standard. She's doing well at school. Her phone usage is monitored and reasonable. Her laptop is monitored and, so far, nothing's awry. She doesn't do Facebook or Instagram or any of the other social networking sites. She's a good kid.

Funnily enough, I had an interview with a college lecturer this week and as soon as I said my only child was 13, he said, 'my eldest is 13. She goes straight up to her room when she comes in and that's the last we see of her. Is yours like that?' 'er yeah...that's why I'm looking at going back to college now'. Love my teen, but I can see she's growing apart from me. As she should.

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newbieman1978 · 28/03/2014 16:32

Homework or they'll end up moaning on that "poor" thread in a few years!

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Mama1980 · 28/03/2014 16:33

My eldest dd is 16 she gets in, raids the fridge, plays with her brothers and sister (6,15 months and 5months) walks the dog, showers, eats dinner, sits and plays/chats, eats food, iPad for a hour then bed. Pretty predictable except on a Wednesday when she goes to dance class, and weekends when she sometimes works for one of my brothers.

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BackforGood · 28/03/2014 16:34

First thing is usually go to the toilet.
Then snuffle around for something to eat
Usually come in and tell me they need some money for a trip something urgent
Then disappear in to their rooms (15 and 17 yr old or slob in front of tele (12 yr old)

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StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes · 28/03/2014 16:37

almost 18 year old DS. shouts 'hello, how was your day', pokes head round door. dumps shoes bag and coat every feckin day despite my nagging in small hallway, goes to loo for half an hour, leaves it skiddy every feckin day despite my nagging. gets a drink, leaves squash bottle out every feckin day despite my nagging disappears to pit bedroom. Mon he teaches dance, Tue goes dance training, wed goes dance training, Thur stays in his room, fri usually out at friends / party / cinema etc. emerges at 7 for dinner and on rare occasions will sit with me and DH to watch a travel or wildlife programme.

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MatureUniStudent · 28/03/2014 16:37

13 & 15 yr old row as they enter the house. They then sort themselves out and row over who is going to do what job. Row whilst doing the jobs. Both will ask how my day was during the rows and tell me about their days during the rows.

I suspect they will be come politicians.

I'm with Trashcanjunkie - they want me there as a back drop of security and normality to what seems an endlessly exhausting life of school work, home work and class room politics.

You made me laugh Sandyballs, my fridge is always empty - that is because I have 3x teenagers at home, a fact none of them can see is the simple reason why the fridge is always empty! They eat NON STOP.

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JustSpeakSense · 28/03/2014 16:38

Mine come in, dump bag etc. at entrance, attack fridge for food, grunt & nod at any questions and then collapse on sofa with iPads. I do get cuddles, chats and information about their lives - but definitely not straight from school (I think they just need some space after a busy day)

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CoffeeTea103 · 28/03/2014 16:38

I'm sorry that you feel this is normal and your children sound very rude speaking like that.

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