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AIBU?

to not be sure about leaving DD4 with DD1?

18 replies

Bogeyface · 03/03/2014 22:48

Short back story...

His redundancy, 6 months looking, 0 hours contract job, my redundancy, bits and bobs ever since but nothing decent or permanent so money has been very short of well over a year. We pay the bills but have £0 left for treats.

Our friend owns a pub and have always worked the beer festivals, great laugh, good money and the odd sneaky pint! But he has moved to a pub 20 miles away and wants us to do one this weekend. The thing is, our lift would be picking us up at 5pm.

DD1 (16) is happy to babysit (she is being paid, and paid well!), DD4 is 2 and they adore each other. In fact when I took DD1 to the docs today to argue her case over an ongoing issue, a woman in the waiting room thought DD1 was DD4's mum and I was grandma (I am 40, thanks for that :o) She is responsible, can cook, is aware of safety, wouldnt be asked to do anything even slightly risky (I will bath DD4 earlier in the day for eg) and DD4 would go to bed about 6/6:30.

I trust DD, in fact I trust her over my mum who is a great grandma (and would be the emergency call as she is just round the corner) but cant help herself doing what she thinks is best instead of what I would prefer. She will probably have a friend around, but I know and trust her too, they are both very sensible (nothing like me at their age!) but she wouldnt take the piss at all.

I still have the willies about it. She has babysat a lot, it is her main source of income, but this will be the first time she has done bed time. I was thinking of asking her to do bed time a couple of nights this week to get used to it.

Would that be ok or should I not go (I would earn £100 for the 2 nights, H would earn the same, we could do something really lovely with the kids for a change with the money)

WWYD? AIBU to be nervy?

OP posts:

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bumpybecky · 03/03/2014 22:53

I think I would in those circumstances, and that's speaking as a mother of an almost 16 year old dd1 who is good with her much younger siblings.

But what's happening with dd2 & 3?

theoldtrout01876 · 03/03/2014 22:55

I would.

I used to leave my 12 year old Dd1 with my 2 year old Dd2 ( not over night at that age though). If Dd1 is up for it and you trust her with dd2 ordinarily,go for it.

Happy money making :o

Bogeyface · 03/03/2014 22:56

DS1 (23) is staying at his GF's, DDs 2 & 3 and DS2 will be with their dad as it is his weekend. DD4 would be there too if it werent for this. I think she would be gutted if I didnt work as she would lose the money as I couldnt afford to pay her if I didnt go.

OP posts:

StarGazeyPond · 03/03/2014 22:59

I honestly can't see a problem. Go for it - and enjoy. I am sure they will be fine.

jacks365 · 03/03/2014 23:00

Dd3 is 16 and dd4 is 2, I wouldn't hesitate to leave dd4 with dd3. She does frequently do her bedtime for me but dd4 is an easy child who often requests to go to bed a bit earlier. Do you think your dd4 would settle for dd1? How easy is she over bedtime. Personally I'd work the two nights but you know your dc better.

foreverondiet · 03/03/2014 23:00

Given that your mum / grandma is round the corner I think its fine.

nannynewo · 03/03/2014 23:01

Yes 100% go! I was babysitting a 3 month old baby aged 14, often until early hours of the morning. The parents owned a pub so at first would just be downstairs should I need anything, but by the time the baby was about 4 months old, I was babysitting alone doing everything! They went on to have another when I was 16 so was then looking after a new born and a toddler. It was absolutely fine :)

OneUp · 03/03/2014 23:01

I would do it, I've left my 15 year old sister with my 2 year old a couple of times :)

AnyFucker · 03/03/2014 23:01

I would do this. What time will you be home ?

Bogeyface · 03/03/2014 23:02

She is fine with me, but she does try to play H up a bit as she knows he is a soft touch so I could imagine her want DD1 to play before too!

I was thinking that if DD put her to bed a couple of times this week, using my routine (I always do the same thing, say the same things) then DD4 might be better for her.

OP posts:

Bogeyface · 03/03/2014 23:03

Will be late home, could be as late a 2.

But she is fine once she is asleep (thankfully!) and I know that DD1 can be trusted to lock up if she wants to go to bed. Its literally just the hour or so before and then bedtime that worries me!

OP posts:

AnyFucker · 03/03/2014 23:04

I wouldn't think twice

Tinpin · 03/03/2014 23:07

I would go. She sounds very sensible and a credit to you. In addition you have an 'emergency grandma' just around the corner.

Go earn your money and then have some fun with it.

Finola1step · 04/03/2014 00:12

I would go. And look forward to earning the extra cash.

caramelwaffle · 04/03/2014 00:16

Yes do it: earn the extra money and enjoy yourselves.

Bogeyface · 04/03/2014 00:19

Thanks guys.

I know I am probably being silly about it, its just the first time she has done this, coupled with the fact that I will be 20 miles away relying on someone else to get me home.

But mum is round the corner, I am sure everything will be fine!

OP posts:

pluCaChange · 04/03/2014 11:40

It's a brilliant thing to do for your 16yo, as well. She will be so proud to know she's helped the family.

Poppylovescheese · 04/03/2014 11:43

I would happily do this. At 16 I was babysitting for 3 under 5s.

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