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to not be sure about leaving DD4 with DD1?

(19 Posts)
Bogeyface Mon 03-Mar-14 22:48:51

Short back story...

His redundancy, 6 months looking, 0 hours contract job, my redundancy, bits and bobs ever since but nothing decent or permanent so money has been very short of well over a year. We pay the bills but have £0 left for treats.

Our friend owns a pub and have always worked the beer festivals, great laugh, good money and the odd sneaky pint! But he has moved to a pub 20 miles away and wants us to do one this weekend. The thing is, our lift would be picking us up at 5pm.

DD1 (16) is happy to babysit (she is being paid, and paid well!), DD4 is 2 and they adore each other. In fact when I took DD1 to the docs today to argue her case over an ongoing issue, a woman in the waiting room thought DD1 was DD4's mum and I was grandma (I am 40, thanks for that grin) She is responsible, can cook, is aware of safety, wouldnt be asked to do anything even slightly risky (I will bath DD4 earlier in the day for eg) and DD4 would go to bed about 6/6:30.

I trust DD, in fact I trust her over my mum who is a great grandma (and would be the emergency call as she is just round the corner) but cant help herself doing what she thinks is best instead of what I would prefer. She will probably have a friend around, but I know and trust her too, they are both very sensible (nothing like me at their age!) but she wouldnt take the piss at all.

I still have the willies about it. She has babysat a lot, it is her main source of income, but this will be the first time she has done bed time. I was thinking of asking her to do bed time a couple of nights this week to get used to it.

Would that be ok or should I not go (I would earn £100 for the 2 nights, H would earn the same, we could do something really lovely with the kids for a change with the money)

WWYD? AIBU to be nervy?

bumpybecky Mon 03-Mar-14 22:53:10

I think I would in those circumstances, and that's speaking as a mother of an almost 16 year old dd1 who is good with her much younger siblings.

But what's happening with dd2 & 3?

theoldtrout01876 Mon 03-Mar-14 22:55:05

I would.

I used to leave my 12 year old Dd1 with my 2 year old Dd2 ( not over night at that age though). If Dd1 is up for it and you trust her with dd2 ordinarily,go for it.

Happy money making grin

Bogeyface Mon 03-Mar-14 22:56:54

DS1 (23) is staying at his GF's, DDs 2 & 3 and DS2 will be with their dad as it is his weekend. DD4 would be there too if it werent for this. I think she would be gutted if I didnt work as she would lose the money as I couldnt afford to pay her if I didnt go.

StarGazeyPond Mon 03-Mar-14 22:59:50

I honestly can't see a problem. Go for it - and enjoy. I am sure they will be fine.

jacks365 Mon 03-Mar-14 23:00:06

Dd3 is 16 and dd4 is 2, I wouldn't hesitate to leave dd4 with dd3. She does frequently do her bedtime for me but dd4 is an easy child who often requests to go to bed a bit earlier. Do you think your dd4 would settle for dd1? How easy is she over bedtime. Personally I'd work the two nights but you know your dc better.

foreverondiet Mon 03-Mar-14 23:00:37

Given that your mum / grandma is round the corner I think its fine.

nannynewo Mon 03-Mar-14 23:01:21

Yes 100% go! I was babysitting a 3 month old baby aged 14, often until early hours of the morning. The parents owned a pub so at first would just be downstairs should I need anything, but by the time the baby was about 4 months old, I was babysitting alone doing everything! They went on to have another when I was 16 so was then looking after a new born and a toddler. It was absolutely fine smile

OneUp Mon 03-Mar-14 23:01:26

I would do it, I've left my 15 year old sister with my 2 year old a couple of times smile

AnyFucker Mon 03-Mar-14 23:01:30

I would do this. What time will you be home ?

Bogeyface Mon 03-Mar-14 23:02:00

She is fine with me, but she does try to play H up a bit as she knows he is a soft touch so I could imagine her want DD1 to play before too!

I was thinking that if DD put her to bed a couple of times this week, using my routine (I always do the same thing, say the same things) then DD4 might be better for her.

Bogeyface Mon 03-Mar-14 23:03:32

Will be late home, could be as late a 2.

But she is fine once she is asleep (thankfully!) and I know that DD1 can be trusted to lock up if she wants to go to bed. Its literally just the hour or so before and then bedtime that worries me!

AnyFucker Mon 03-Mar-14 23:04:53

I wouldn't think twice

Tinpin Mon 03-Mar-14 23:07:20

I would go. She sounds very sensible and a credit to you. In addition you have an 'emergency grandma' just around the corner.

Go earn your money and then have some fun with it.

Finola1step Tue 04-Mar-14 00:12:36

I would go. And look forward to earning the extra cash.

caramelwaffle Tue 04-Mar-14 00:16:16

Yes do it: earn the extra money and enjoy yourselves.

Bogeyface Tue 04-Mar-14 00:19:19

Thanks guys.

I know I am probably being silly about it, its just the first time she has done this, coupled with the fact that I will be 20 miles away relying on someone else to get me home.

But mum is round the corner, I am sure everything will be fine!

pluCaChange Tue 04-Mar-14 11:40:28

It's a brilliant thing to do for your 16yo, as well. She will be so proud to know she's helped the family. smile

Poppylovescheese Tue 04-Mar-14 11:43:33

I would happily do this. At 16 I was babysitting for 3 under 5s.

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