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(33 Posts)
ChoccyDigestive82 Thu 27-Feb-14 13:29:44

Have had 2 days off due to a stomach bug. Before I left work on the Monday I had placed my copper jar on my desk, any spare money goes in, not just coppers. It is a small office and everyone is very close - no trust issues.

I am using this jar to save some cash for my May holiday even if it's just £50.

Today I come in to find a note in my jar saying
"I owe you 70p ,needed it for my bus".

This girl has form for never returniing borrowed items and I'm a bit fed up that she thought she could just help herself to my cash. I know it's only 70p but it's the principal, if I had left my purse would she have gone in there? Of course I've not mentioned anything to her but I feel like Im being unreasonable for being so fucked off!

ChoccyDigestive82 Fri 28-Feb-14 13:32:44

Well I still haven't had it back despite jokingly reminding her. I think opinions are definitely swayed.

To reiterate, it's not how much she borrowed, it's because she didn't ask. I think it's rude.

This girl constantly wants something for nothing.

I don't think I'm being unreasonable calling her a scrubber (scrubber down here means scrounger) because she is!

FryOneFatManic Fri 28-Feb-14 12:57:45

AMuminScotland Difference is that you and your colleagues obviously trust each other and you would be honourable about paying this back.

From OP's description, this girl is the kind to "borrow" stuff without the intention of refunding/returning, something altogether different.

PortofinoRevisited Fri 28-Feb-14 12:48:34

You ARE unreasonable to call her a scrubber hmm

DomesticDisgrace Fri 28-Feb-14 12:48:09

God this wouldn't bother me in the slightest!!

AMumInScotland Fri 28-Feb-14 12:48:00

I and my colleagues often ask each other for change. If any of them had a coin jar open on their desk, I would assume it could be used for swapping eg a pound coin for smaller coins, or, in case of need, swapping 70p in coins for an IOU.

I don't see anything fundamentally unreasonable in doing that.

FryOneFatManic Fri 28-Feb-14 12:46:11

Actually, this girl sounds very much like the kind of person who, even if you ask for the money, will have some excuse why she hasn't got it right then, and you'll not get the money back.

CadleCrap Fri 28-Feb-14 12:44:41

At least she left the IOU - as others have said. make sure you have change on you and pester her.

Then hide the jar

ForgettableTampon Fri 28-Feb-14 12:33:06

lock away your stuff, say no to cadgers

WorraLiberty Fri 28-Feb-14 12:32:34

This wouldn't have bothered me at all

If someone needed 70p for a bus, I'd just think it was good that my change jar was there.

If you think she's not going to give it back, just ask her for it

GreenPetal94 Fri 28-Feb-14 12:31:13

It's only 70p

Pumpkinpositive Fri 28-Feb-14 12:30:28

But a jar of coins on a desk, with an IOU left, which is then repaid, is not exactly dishonest, is it?

She didn't ask though. I can't just swish into the local jewellers, liberate them of their biggest rock, and leave an IOU in its place.

OP may have decided against lending Stickyfingers the money had she been asked. She does have the right to do so.

Pumpkinpositive Fri 28-Feb-14 12:27:24

Do you have a lockable desk? It's time to start removing temptation from Stickyfingers way!

She'll hopefully realise you weren't impressed when she realises the jar is now under lock and key.

NeedsAsockamnesty Fri 28-Feb-14 12:23:30

If it is not yours you should not touch it, YANBU

pompey27 Fri 28-Feb-14 12:18:35

I don't think YABU at all. You can't help yourself to people's things whatever the value

AMumInScotland Fri 28-Feb-14 12:01:52

What pisses me off at my work is cartons of milk in the fridge - sometimes I have bought one, and only managed a splash in a couple of mugs of coffee before it has all mysteriously gone. Each person doubtless only takes a splash, but the end result is black coffee for me angry

AMumInScotland Fri 28-Feb-14 11:59:59

The thing about coins though, is that they are actually interchangeable - someone can borrow 70p, and leave an IOU, and then pay you back, with 70p in coins that are every bit as 'good' as the ones they borrowed.

That's not the same as taking something which can't then be replaced in a short timescale, like the Prada carrier bag, or part of your snack.

If you don't want to lend her cigarettes, then don't. If you don't want to share your food, then don't. But a jar of coins on a desk, with an IOU left, which is then repaid, is not exactly dishonest, is it?

lazyhound444 Fri 28-Feb-14 11:59:39

I worked in an office years ago where a tight arsed thieving little git constantly took people's newspapers and magazines to read at break time (a) without asking (b) before the owner had even read them and (c) SHE DID THE CROSSWORD!!! Oh and don't get me started on foodstuffs disappearing from communal fridges. How someone can take another person's lovingly prepared lunch is beyond me. In one scenario they set up a hidden camera to find out who was doing it. Culprit ended up getting sacked!

ChoccyDigestive82 Fri 28-Feb-14 11:45:39

But the thing is she is always asking for something, every day it's "can I borrow a cigarette". I doubt very much this was for a bus ticket. It was more likely for a pack of fags. She spends the whole month moaning about being skint then on payday she is buying clothes online and getting her hair done - she lives at home whereas I don't. As soon as I open a pack of fags or bring out snack, she wants some of it.

It's getting annoying, she is a scrubber and I no longer feel like I am being unreasonable. Taking without asking is theft. Had it been a bunch of pound coins on my desk, would she have taken these? It's rude. My savings jar is not for any tom dick or harry to help themselves to when needs be.

CaptainHindsight Thu 27-Feb-14 17:18:14

I used to keep a tub on change in my top drawer for lunches/collections etc. I noticed over a few weeks the change appeared to be depleting. I counted it all up and over the next 3 days another £4 was stolen.

I emptied the tub and put a note in its place telling the thieving little fucker that I hope their hands rotted off.

I have never found the culprit. angry
The sad thing is there isn't one colleague I wouldn't give £4 if they asked me.

FurryDogMother Thu 27-Feb-14 17:04:46

Make sure you have 30p in change on you, and next time you see her ask if she has a pound coin 'cos you need it for something or other - then offer the 30p and say - thanks for the 70p you owe me smile

notthegirlnextdoor Thu 27-Feb-14 16:51:03

I am gobsmacked at the cheek of these people!
"Only 70p" "Only a carrier bag" well why fucking take it then if its "only"?! Taking without asking is theft.

NorwegianBirdhouse Thu 27-Feb-14 16:36:11

Well maybe she really was caught short at home time, and she did put a note in telling you what she had done. Maybe she thought it would feel worse asking someone to lend it to her when a jar of coppers and loose change looks like it is going nowhere fast.

She could easily have taken it and you would be none the wiser.

Jess03 Thu 27-Feb-14 15:59:50

Just ask her about it everytime you bump into her, she'll pay you back eventually and probably with a bad grace!

Suicidal5833 Thu 27-Feb-14 15:54:33

The sheer cheek of some people and that includes carrior bag lady.

LouiseAderyn Thu 27-Feb-14 15:03:54

I think you are being a little bit unreasonable. She left you a note, which implies intention to repay. If you had been at your desk then of course she would have asked and you would probably have said yes. She probably just saw it as a convenient solution to her problem and means no harm by it.

It's not the same as going in your purse because it is not invading your privacy or leaving you short of change that you might need for your own bus fare, for example.

The carrier bag thing would have annoyed me, but I would not be bugged by the change unless she doesn't repay or does it regularly.

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