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to not want to pick up ds early everyday?

(93 Posts)
stinkysox Mon 09-Dec-13 18:32:11

My 1st post on aibu so please be gentle!

Ds attends pre-school, afternoons, 12.15-3.15. It never opens early (usually closer to 12.20) It is attached to an infants and primary so the majority of the parents collect their dcs just after 3 when the older children get out.
I usually get there around 3 but today I didn't arrive until 3.10. As I walked up to the school I heard one of the teachers say 'oh here's mummy, ds' I looked up to see ds at the window wearing his coat & waving.
I got to the door (outside door to reception, there is then another door to classroom) and instead of being let in as normal, ds was ushered out to me with a quick goodbye.
I explained I had fees to pay so they let me in, halfheartedly looked around the office for a few seconds, complete with eye rolls, then said they couldn't find the receipt book and could I pay tomorrow. I said fine, and noticed a few of the staff members already had their coats on ready to leave.
AIBU to think this rude, and that I shouldn't be expected to pick ds up 15 minutes early when I pay for him to be there?

stinkysox Mon 09-Dec-13 21:13:46

popper I'm sure they don't. Unless you also do the eye roll and practically push dcs out of the door wearing your own coat! grin

popperdoodles Mon 09-Dec-13 21:25:29

No never got our coats on, far too much to after children have left

okthen Mon 09-Dec-13 21:29:34

Yanbu- and I don't think teachers having their own kids to pick up is a mitigating factor. It's a job. You do your contracted hours, and if that means you are contracted to leave in time to do school run, great. If it doesn't (like the vast majority of people), you make other arrangements.

Idespair Mon 09-Dec-13 21:34:03

I would say to the staff - "could you tell me the finishing time for preschool please? I thought it was 3.15 but it looks as though i am late when I arrive at 3.10, I'm confused". See what they say.

stinkysox Mon 09-Dec-13 22:14:11

I tried that idespair they just said no, it's 3.15 but most parents come at 3. They obviously can't tell me to be there at 3 but make me feel uncomfortable when I'm not.

DoJo Mon 09-Dec-13 22:52:52

If it doesn't (like the vast majority of people), you make other arrangements.
I suppose that they might have done initially and then cancelled them when it turned out that they were actually able to do it themselves 90% of the time. I can kind of understand them being ready and having your son ready, but the eye rolling and attitude is rude and completely inappropriate.

Gileswithachainsaw Mon 09-Dec-13 23:03:07

Why don't they just make it three O clock confused

I'd be narked tbh , as mentioned before it's unfair on him missing out on things because they are clock watching. If the others are all ready to go by three then they must start getting them ready around 2:45. That leaves ur and the other dcs sat around in coats for half an hour with staff watching the doors.

PrincessScrumpy Mon 09-Dec-13 23:12:00

I would say very loudly to dc "oh you've already got your coat on, looks like your teachers are trying to get off work early today!... you've still got 5 more minutes so why don't you show me what you did today?" Said with a big smile. Not sure if it would work but it would at least make the point and amuse me too smile

stinkysox Mon 09-Dec-13 23:25:20

[Grin] princess
That would be great.
If I'm being honest, it would probably bug me slightly less if they hadn't left us outside in a hail storm a few weeks ago until 12.18 (yes, I clock watched)

stinkysox Mon 09-Dec-13 23:26:19

Smiley fail blush

zipzap Mon 09-Dec-13 23:42:35

I'd make sure I told them in the morning that I was planning on picking up ds at closing time so at 3.15 so you would appreciate it if they just had his coat ready for him to put on when you arrived as you don't want him sitting around getting overheated for ages indoors when you then have to take him out in the cold.

And then maybe turn up a couple of minutes early and ask them to explain why he has got his coat on when you specifically asked them not to put it on so he could enjoy his paid for time at nursery playing rather than sitting there over heating waiting for you!

FastWindow Tue 10-Dec-13 00:02:04

They sound like a load of jobsworths.

You could try the MN direct approach, and tell them that they are making you feel like you are late when you are really early.

Agree with pp who said they should move the whole session back (but then I guess they would have to come in earlier for the am session)

My preschool at the exact opposite, the doors do not open until bang on time, but there have other things like repeatedly losing his peg name card. Three year old notice, believe me.

FastWindow Tue 10-Dec-13 00:05:09


Oh, forget it. Let's just say I'm illiterate and say no more about it. grin

I obviously went to a bad preschool myself.

poopadoop Tue 10-Dec-13 01:10:07

>the MN direct approach, and tell them that they are making you feel like you are late when you are really early.

Nice! That would annoy me too, it really the direct thing, and let them eye roll all they want!

MammaTJ Tue 10-Dec-13 06:07:00

I would do the direct thing to.

I would probably ask what DS had been doing once the others had gone too.

They don't want to change the hours, as it reduces the funding, when they get it.

CloverkissSparklecheeks Tue 10-Dec-13 07:00:37

Pre schools are audited on their NEG funding, the registers are checked against the hours they have claimed. They are not losing funding, they are merely claiming for the hours children are there and can fill those other spaces with extra children.

They have to give you a form to sign with the number of hours on you want to claim and if I remember rightly there is a declaration about you claiming correctly and being liable to pay back if you lie.

They do not sound great, our setting was a complete pack away setting and we still didn't put the dcs coats on before the end time.

TheUnstoppableWindmill Tue 10-Dec-13 07:08:10

If you've only picked him up after 3 a few times, it might get better if you start consistently arriving at 3.10-3.15 and they get used to it being a regular thing?
I feel for you though. I'd be fuming!

stinkysox Tue 10-Dec-13 10:04:01

Thanks for the replies everyone. I was thinking about finding out if there is another parent who doesn't have older dcs (there must be one!) Maybe they attend on different days, and see what they do? I like the thought of the direct approach although I'm not great with confrontation, and I'd worry they might treat ds differently if I complain?

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights Tue 10-Dec-13 10:10:22

I'd just pick him up at 3 - why make life difficult for everyone involved. It's not as though you have to finish work early or anything. Life is too short to make an issue out of such a non issue. Really it is smile

Gileswithachainsaw Tue 10-Dec-13 10:14:34

Why is it making life difficult though?

It may only be fifteen mins but over a week that's over an hour they loose out on. Multiply that by however many weeks they attend. 36 or whatever and that's a lot if time they are being paid to work but in Fact aren't

Gileswithachainsaw Tue 10-Dec-13 10:16:25

And of that do that in the morning sessions then that's a lot of kids loosing part of their early years education.

sneezecakesmum Tue 10-Dec-13 10:17:01

Ignore them and pick your DS up when it suits you provided you are not late.

They are just being cheeky!

Gileswithachainsaw Tue 10-Dec-13 10:24:34

If each session is three hours and your loosing about an hour a week over 36 weeks (approx) that's 36 hours. 36~3 =12.

12x £10-12 (it's usually per session well round her it is) that's £120-144 a year they have over chares you grin

Awaits correction on calculation


CloverkissSparklecheeks Tue 10-Dec-13 10:30:37

I disagree that you should pick him up at 3, you/someone is paying for a 3 hour session. The NEG funding is for a 3 hour session or you are paying for that session. It is an issue, if the OP worked then it would be even more so.

The staff are paid to be there, they are currently not providing a 3 hour session to the children which they should be.

At our setting parents complained that the doors did not open dead on 9am, the clock in the hall was 5 minutes slow so the staff didn't realise, of course they were more than happy to make sure that didn't happen again.

Mckayz Tue 10-Dec-13 10:33:54

Do not pick him up early like Chipping said. You are paying for him to be there until 315. Unless they are going to refund you an hour a week every week.

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