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To ask for the child benefit to be split?

(59 Posts)
marieclare168 Mon 16-Sep-13 22:02:10

Please be gentle with me as this is my first post.

My husband was married previously and has 2 teenagers. He has joint residency and therefore receives child benefit for one of them (their mother gets CB for the other - this arrangement was put in place when they split 8+ years ago).

We now also have 2yo DS together and I have my own CB claim for him. My payments for DS are at the 2nd child rate. DH receives payments at 1st child rate for stepson.

It just occurred to me that this seems unfair and that we really should be pooling the total we both receive from CB and splitting it 50/50 between the 2 children.

Husband cannot see my point of view at all and says it's never going to happen. He says I would be taking money off stepson if we split the funds as his award is for his specific child and my award is separate. My thought is, if my claim were genuinely separate I would be receiving the full amount for our DS but clearly the CB treat us as a household and theoretically assume the 1st/2nd/subsequent amounts are pooled in any household and shared for the benefit of the children.

apachepony Tue 17-Sep-13 09:42:14

As mentioned above, it is absolutely ludicrous that maintenance for his child with his ex is coming out of the joint household account whereas nursery fees for your joint ds are being paid solely by you. I would be angrier about this than about the child benefit to be honest. I am assuming he would definitely kick off if you raised that issue though for me it would be a fight worth having. Children in a second family are not the sole responsibility of their mother, the father has equal responsibility for both sets of children, for the first family, shared with their mother, for the second family, shared with his partner.

whois Tue 17-Sep-13 09:01:19

I find it ridiculous that maintenance is viewed as a joint family expense but nursery fees aren't. You're being taken for a mug


Seriously, sort it out! Your JOINT child's expenses should be coming out of the family pot. Seriously not on the way things are now and the situation is bigger than the CB split.

IneedAsockamnesty Tue 17-Sep-13 08:46:50

Topics I didn't think of it like that.

iamadoozermum Tue 17-Sep-13 07:30:55

Thing is though, £3 a week comes to £156 a year. That would buy a fair amount of clothes/toys etc.

BlackholesAndRevelations Tue 17-Sep-13 06:17:59

Presumably you've calculated your finances so that each of you contributes equally in your own way. Do you both have equal spending money for yourselves? I disagree that you're being taken for a mug if this is the case.

No idea re: maintenance etc.

Also think yabu for quibbling over £3 a week. If you go out as a family, he pays. Maybe that extra few quid is absorbed there.

gobbynorthernbird Tue 17-Sep-13 00:49:59

But it's only half of £6 per week. So £3 is the amount being argued over.

topicsactiveimon Tue 17-Sep-13 00:14:19

Sorry, £6/week. YANBU to point this out, but if the rest of the financial arrangement between you and DP is healthy, then I'd let this one slide.

topicsactiveimon Tue 17-Sep-13 00:12:31

I would have an issue with this if CB was going into a savings acct for the children - clearly they should both get the same amount put in each month. But as you're spending it on them as needed then why even bring this up, unless you feel DS is being done out of something essential that comes to £3.50/week?

You are right, of course, about the non-equitable split. But it amounts to nothing.

Now, do you have another reason to worry that your son is being financially disadvantaged?

IneedAsockamnesty Tue 17-Sep-13 00:05:37

And the difference is about £6 pw not £3 pw

The eldest child gets 20.30
Subsequent children get 13.40

jacks365 Tue 17-Sep-13 00:04:13

If the maintenance goes through the csa they have methods for dealing with split residency like this but if the mums income is low and the dads high then he will pay much more. Chb is higher rate for each household.

I find it ridiculous that maintenance is viewed as a joint family expense but nursery fees aren't. You're being taken for a mug.

IneedAsockamnesty Tue 17-Sep-13 00:02:34

Bruthas is correct.

The eldest child rate for CB gets paid for the eldest child in each household
So dad gets it for eldest child in his house mum gets to for eldest child in her house but op can't because she's in the same household as dad.

needaholidaynow Mon 16-Sep-13 23:50:08

WTAF has all that "are you the OW?" crap got to do with this?

gobbynorthernbird Mon 16-Sep-13 23:17:40

Oh gosh, ignore that. The ex should pay to you too if it's a 50% split with the time.

NoSquirrels Mon 16-Sep-13 23:17:30

Presumably once your DSS reaches age of 18 your DH will no longer be able to claim CB, and your DS will become no. 1, higher-rate child?

I agree with you, btw. But it is a can of worms. I would worry a bit about your DH going off the deep-end at a theoretical discussion about £ 3.50 a week, too.

gobbynorthernbird Mon 16-Sep-13 23:15:14

But if they only pay for one child it must even out? This is all terribly convoluted.

BruthasTortoise Mon 16-Sep-13 23:12:55

Your DH is wrong, the ex will get higher rate for the child that is resident with her. Is she paying maintenance for the child that is resident with your DH?

maddymoo25 Mon 16-Sep-13 23:11:41

That makes no sense if that was the case the ex would have to pay csa to the child he has residents for, which would then counter act lol

marieclare168 Mon 16-Sep-13 23:07:46

Technically actually we only pay CSA for one of the older children because DH is classed as resident parent for the other (the one he gets CB for). There is no proper allowance for 50% care in the CSA framework.
We get a discount for the number of nights residency.

And this business of the ex getting the lower rate, (as DH thinks is the case but we can't find the paperwork), surely can't be right.

Imagine he went off and got 10 more women pregnant, when they came to claim CB they couldn't all be awarded 2nd/subsequent child amounts even if they were the first children in the mothers household?

This is where I think its more about the theory/policy than my situation necessarily.

jessieagain Mon 16-Sep-13 23:05:36

I think if you have very separate accounts like that then it isn't fair for you to pay for all of your ds clothes, food, nursery.

Instead of arguing about cb (which sounds petty) ask for the nursery fees to come out of the joint account as it should be a shared family expense.

Also maybe you could ask your dh to pay for some regular expense for your ds (like shoes or haircuts) out if his personal account as it doesn't seem right for him to pay for nothing directly related to ds.

maddymoo25 Mon 16-Sep-13 23:02:00

I would defo have more of an issue with matinence , so you have them 50 pecent of the time so you feed, clothe and house them etc pay for clubs and he pays matinence lol

gobbynorthernbird Mon 16-Sep-13 23:00:51

Ah, ok. Apologies. Still think that the maintenance is the bigger issue, though.

Gossipmonster Mon 16-Sep-13 22:59:21

I thought that CB was always paid to the mother except in exceptional circumstances a because of domestic abuse?

BruthasTortoise Mon 16-Sep-13 22:58:11

No she won't, if the OPs other DSC is the oldest child on his mum's claim she'll get higher rate for him.

marieclare168 Mon 16-Sep-13 22:57:37

Wilson yes I agree about WW3. For me it started as an interesting semi academic conversation, along the lines of.. ooh hang on, wait a minute, we have been doing this wrong, we should be splitting it, wonder what the CB people's policy is etc etc.
But DH has gone totally off the handle in response so you are probably right, a can of worms that should have stayed shut.

gobbynorthernbird Mon 16-Sep-13 22:57:20

And yes, why do you pay for kids that live with you 50% of the time? That would be a much bigger issue than the CB to me.

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