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I want what my friend has!

(37 Posts)
areaGL51 Mon 09-Sep-13 11:57:10

I know this is unreasonable, but I'm so jealous of my friend and the way her life is. This isn't bitchy because I really, really like her, but I wish it was me!

Where to start. Well, she's liked by everyone and I mean everyone. You couldn't dislike someone like her. She's very funny - really good at telling witty stories and is great company. She's probably the most intelligent of all my friends and very cultured. She's well travelled, well read, well educated well everything really!

She has a lovely, lovely creative job which she does around the school hours. Her DH earns a packet in a very trendy, well-respected, interesting job.

They have one DD who is practically a mini-genius and is absolutely beautiful. Top of the class in everything and is very popular. Even the parents like her as she's so polite and sensible. Good influence on our DCs and all that.

Her house is gorgeous. Not just spotlessly clean, but shining! Everything is lovely. Lots of quality furniture and intellelectual things! I know this is silly, but I can't describe in depths in case I give it a way. Even her garden is beautiful - think magazine photoshoot standard.

Her DH is also very attractive. All the women we know think so!

She's beautiful. Lovely natural hair, skin etc and an jealous rage-inducing figure. She always, always looks really well dressed. On the school run, she looks like I would after hours of getting ready, and you know it's only taken her a few minutes.

She always seems to have loads of time for nice things in life and is so relaxed. If you pop over, she's always very welcoming and there's always some posh coffee on the go and something baking in the oven. They know a few famous people because of their work, and they're often popping over in the daytime too. It just makes me jealous!

I want her life!

defineme Mon 09-Sep-13 18:45:12

I think the joy of having my Mum friends that I made when kids were babies is that no matter how different their lives are from mine( yes yes to famous friends/holiday homes/spotless houses) we have always bonded over the inevitable highs and lows of parenting that comes whatever your life is like. Kids waking up/throwing up in the night, friendship isssues, fussy eating etc etc.

I was struck by a story Mel Gibson once told (before madness/racism woes) of the horror of being in a cafe with a child with an exploding nappy. Or photos of Brad Pitt at a souless looking soft play place in a shopping mall. Money makes little difference to these things.

Now the kids are older we bond over kids starting big school/aged parents. It's the same fear whether your child is starting local school/private prep/special school/whatever.

kerala Mon 09-Sep-13 18:51:26

Bizarre how people chip in with tales of doom and hidden misery! Schadenfreude much? Maybe she has a great life and good luck to her.

areaGL51 Mon 09-Sep-13 18:55:48

No, I haven't posted about her before but it wouldn't surprise me if another of her friends has! :-D

We have bonded over parenting things, but honestly her DD always does everything just right. She's like a doll. We've had her for sleepovers a couple of times, and she's a happy, clever little confident thing. My DD is gorgeous, but can be so grumpy and stubborn. My friend's DD will eat anything, whereas my DD eyes anything new on her plate with suspicion. I know my DD's normal though.

My friend isn't an intellectual snob (I wish she was, because that would be a fault!) and is very down to earth. She's just very, very clever and knowledgable. You'd want her on your pub quiz team! She can hold her own confidently in any type of conversation. I've seen her chat about really obscure music with a famous rock star, Far Eastern politics with a knowledgable travel writer, and recipes for homemade play-dough at playgroup years ago. You get the picture!

She seems to have so much time, energy and knowledge. Her home and her life are so tranquil and perfect. I want that!

areaGL51 Mon 09-Sep-13 18:57:23

I hope she doesn't have anything horrible going on in her life. I'm not wanting people to think that's what I'm after. No, she's a fantastic person and is very kind and generous. She's the friend you turn to when you really need someone and she's helped me a lot in the past.

No, I just get bloody jealous and want her life!

wordfactory Mon 09-Sep-13 19:13:26

It's unlikely you'd be able to do everyhting she does, OP, but there's no reason why you can't improve one or two things in your own life grin.

What does she do/have that you'd most like?

LynetteScavo Mon 09-Sep-13 19:18:31

Actually, the touching thing sounds really weird. Isn't that what Madonna and Guy were told to do when they were in relationship counselling?

One thought (amongst many) - think of her as an asset in your life.

Enjoy her company, chilling out in her lovely home, your children's friendship as well as your own, and her good coffee !

Beaverfeaver Mon 09-Sep-13 19:49:10

If people never strived to be like anyone else there would be no ambition.

minouminou Mon 09-Sep-13 20:17:13

Do you know what, OP....she's friends with YOU because SHE thinks YOU'RE great too.

Doubtfuldaphne Mon 09-Sep-13 20:48:01

I want to know what the gl51 thing was all about! That's my area! I can't stop guessing who this girl is. I know a lot of that type though. What makes it even worse is that they're SO damn nice too. Grrrr!

MissMuesli Mon 09-Sep-13 20:57:03

You sounds like a nice to be jealous but only want happiness for your friend! Even though she has the "better" lifestyle I bet there are things about you that he envies!

Bonsoir Tue 10-Sep-13 12:02:47

Don't waste time wanting things that are out of your reach!

I had a tedious time on Sunday when we picnicked with another family. The mother is a single mother of three and she has a very demanding and high powered job she adores. She earns a lot, is likely to earn a lot more in future and, although she has lots of outgoings (two nannies, mortgage), she has significant child support from her ex-husband. She takes several international holidays a year with her DC and lots of weekends away around Europe, and all her DC do many extra activities. The whole family is plurilingual (three or four languages at mother tongue standard) and her DC do competitive sport.

She would like a new husband. Her exH was a real Alpha male and she doesn't want to lower her sights one little bit. The trouble is, she met her first husband when she was 23 and single. She is now nearly 40, with significant baggage and a busy lifestyle on which she doesn't want to compromise. I find it almost intolerable to humour her as she relates her impossible wish-list of qualities for the husband she seeks...

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