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To want to let this friendship go

(5 Posts)
Picoo Mon 06-May-13 17:10:54

I've been friends with a girl for about 6 or so years, initially through work but she recently moved to the town next to mine. She's a nice person but has radically different ideas to me, particularly with regard to parenting. I think we have moved apart a lot in terms of our interests and ideas and have almost zero in common now.

I really try hard to get on with her but I find that I can't voice my real opinion in her company as she gets upset and very defensive if I disagree with her. I also feel like I'm a bit of a crutch for her at the moment as she doesn't have a lot of money and doesn't get to go many places, etc and I'm "convenient" as I'm close by.

I find myself getting wound up when I have to meet with her and am beginning to think of excuses not to see her. I feel trapped though and don't know how to get out of this. We're both on maternity leave at the moment and therefore have spare time to see each other - I'm running out of excuses at this point and also feel like a cow to boot.

pinkyredrose Mon 06-May-13 17:38:53

Sounds like you're walking on different paths. A good friend is someone you look forward to seeing not make excuses not to see.

I have a few good friends, we disagree on.lots of things but we agree to disagree iykwim? That's how a friendship should be if you ask me, enjoying a persons company but respecting their views.

It looks like you're going to have to phase her out of your life.

quesadilla Mon 06-May-13 17:50:18

If you feel uncomfortable about the prospect of seeing someone the signs are not promising. Maybe just let it slide a bit and see how she responds. If she asks you you should mention the defensiveness. But if, as you suspect, she is using you as a crutch she may go with it. Recognising that a friendship has passed its sell-by date is quite a good thing to do sometimes .

LaGuardia Mon 06-May-13 20:09:28

I agree with quesadilla. Sometimes friendships do come to a natural end.

Picoo Tue 07-May-13 11:37:57

Thanks everybody for your input. smile

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