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to expect people not to park in Spaces for the disabled if they are not using them for the benefit of the Blue Badge holder?

(89 Posts)
ChaosTrulyReigns Wed 20-Mar-13 21:23:44

Alopogies in advance, but this has really disappointed me and I want a unanimous AIBU as I know I am right.

At the Post Office earlier I saw I man I know park in the disabled bay nearest the shop and pop the blue badge on the dashboard. His passenger then got out and whizzed into the shop.

Surely the badge is there for the man to use when he gets out the car to make access easier for him. He could park further away or drop her off?

I just am so disappointed that someone with experience of the difficulties getting around would take up a spaxe which could be needed by someone less able.

AIBU to be saddened by his lack of consideration?

evansthebread Fri 22-Mar-13 01:31:31

I had to fight for my BB as I don't claim DLA (I suffer with anxiety and depression so the applications/medicals/appeals were just to much for me).

I use a crutch and a carer for support now, but before I had the BB I was in a wheelchair. It wouldn't fit into the boot so had to be wrangled into the back seat of the car (it's a large, heavy, old-fashioned monstrosity). Because I didn't have a BB, I was too afraid to risk parking in a space.

After a few months of struggling to get chair out of back of car in a normal space, then DP hurting his back fighting the damn thing, I gave in and told him to park in a disabled space. Of course, that would be the one occasion an attendant came along. We were fined, despite our obvious difficulties. I was NOT ladylike when I spotted someone who blithely pulled up and trotted off after shoving a BB in his windscreen - attendant wouldn't even go check it was his. Yes, there are hidden disabilities (I have Fibro so can look normal until I start to walk), but that guy clearly didn't have any kind of disability that's covered in the conditions needed to get one.

It was that incident that made me apply. Bloody jobsworth!

Because of the abuse, I am too afraid to have DP drop myself and a carer off and then park the car close by in case he's caught without me in it, even though life would be much easier for me.

DoubleLifeIsALifeHalved Thu 21-Mar-13 18:04:27

i did have a few carers last year who were shocking about the blue badge... taking it off me (they drove me, not me driving), and 'forgetting' to give it back and then keeping it overnight/ weekends etc... one would keep it for weeks at a time and unsurprisingly doesnt work for me anymore! I'm sure they used it in their personal time and it really pissed me off as i was physically unable to get it back off them and it smacks of taking advantage of a vulnerable person and i hate feeling like that.

from that experience I wonder if people who abuse blue badges dont have much empathy for the people that really need them ... as those couple of carers were really awful carers too!

DoubleLifeIsALifeHalved Thu 21-Mar-13 18:00:37

GoldMandra people's need to see a visible disability

this is very well put! am surprised its only one person on this thread who trotted out the same old flawed logic about invisible illnesses. Its almost like we had a civilised debate about something blue badge and parking related! <faints> :-)

but on a serious note, please please don't shy away from getting a blue badge because of this... I was the same but since i've had one, my life really has been a bit easier! and actually, i haven't had any peculiar looks off people yet, which is very weird as i def dont 'look' disabled if you see me just for second, or a couple of meters moving... except for some days when i walk funny. i dont go to supermarkets and places like that though, which is where these things seem to happen, as i cant, so send my carer, who i doesnt use the badge for that (though now i'll ask her as i hadn't thought about it before!)

I do absolutely use disabled spaces to park in and send my carer into a shop (she drives not me), whilst I am in the car. Its because I am in so much pain every second counts and I may not be able to stand it long enough to get home. i didn't think about this being any kind of infraction of the badge as its entirely due to my disability that speed is of the essence... and in those circumstances does that mean i am wrong after all? am confused now!

TravelinColour Thu 21-Mar-13 17:52:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

zebrafinch Thu 21-Mar-13 17:38:53

sassh yes that's correct. I would love to be able to park at a distance , take my time, saunter in and look around but DS will be getting distressed, start sweating and not so long ago went through a phase of turning blue. We travel with oxygen. When he gets distressed and panicky , the stress can trigger a tonic clonic fit. our horizons have very much shrunk, a long journey of more than an hour is out unless he is lying down in an ambulance.
(I do not make a habit of popping into the shops.)

Goldmandra Thu 21-Mar-13 17:13:30

Thank you for those responses. Maybe I should bite the bullet then. She wouldn't notice the looks and whispers even though I would.

Valium, if we get one I'll take you with me in my head when we go out just in case smile

dropdeaddivalover Thu 21-Mar-13 16:13:32

We have BB for DD and have never been challenged but since we got special needs pushchair we get less looks and whispers whilst others walk past car.

valiumredhead Thu 21-Mar-13 15:56:56

I have never been challenged either, I would like to see someone fecking try!

valiumredhead Thu 21-Mar-13 15:56:18

noclue I imagine if it is outside their house then they have arranged/applied for it to be there iyswim so it's theirs as opposed to one in a car park.

Blue badges are NOT only for mobility related illnesses.

The BB holder is not meant to sit in the car in a disabled bay while someone else nips to the shops - although why would you begrudge a carer this, surely life is shit and anything that makes things a bit easier is good, right?

FabOeufsFromLaChocolateries Thu 21-Mar-13 15:53:41

We have one for DD with ASD and have never been challenged

Goldmandra Thu 21-Mar-13 15:49:09

It is people's need to see a visible disability which is preventing me from getting a BB for DD2.

She has AS and various other health problems which make it hard for her to walk far sometimes and when places are busy or someone brushes against her we really need quick access to the car to help manage meltdowns. She get DLA HRC and I know that medical professionals would support our application but I can't cope with the idea of people challenging us because they cannot see a disability. It would make having the badge pointless because she would never go anywhere if she thought someone might have a go sad

noclue2000 Thu 21-Mar-13 14:34:54

so even thought he isnt in the car when she is parking there, she can still do it?
the hubby works, so she parks there even when he isnt in the house.

daisydotandgertie Thu 21-Mar-13 07:43:28

TravelinColour Blue badges are for mobility related disability though, so it's unlikely that a blue badge holder would have a hidden disability (the exception is higher lever DLA and various war veteran pensions).

And what about those with a terminal illness? My DH was issued with one because they said he has less than six months to live. He certainly has no visible disability.

You can never, never, never tell what is happening in people's lives. Not just by looking. Try hard not to judge - life can be unutterably shit and people have to cope as best they can.

FabOeufsFromLaChocolateries Thu 21-Mar-13 07:39:00

There is so much BB abuse around. My DD has one and we can't even find a free space half the time.

And people regularly come strolling perfectly normally back to car then affect a really obvious fake limp if they see you looking.

sashh Thu 21-Mar-13 07:31:06


I stand corrected.

Please don't think I'm being rude, genuine question, but if your son stays in the car with someone else why do you need to park in the blue badge space?

Is it because he can't be left for long?

yes I am a BB Nazi. When my father was in hospital I followed my mum home and told her off. She had parked in the BB space the council put outside their house

thereonthestair Thu 21-Mar-13 07:20:36

No clue. That is allowed. I have a ds with a blue badge. I was told I was not only allowed to do that but expected to (it connects to whether I also need a residents parking permit)

zebrafinch Thu 21-Mar-13 07:09:07

I have just been on UGov website and searched for the leaflet on the blue badge. Hopeully someone else can make the link.
It is not illegal for the disabled blue badge holder to remain in the car whilst a passenger pops into the shop etc or also if the disabled person does the errand and their passenger or driver remains It says whilst not illegal consideration should be given to other blue badge holders . My severely disabled son is the blue badge holder, he cannot drive and to take him out of the vehicle and put him back in the van would take half an hour faffing, just getting out of the house is like a military logistics operation I seriously had never considered that I had to take him out of the van each time I rushed into the shop. Also just to say I would not be leaving him alone in the van it takes two people to take him out of the house

sashh Thu 21-Mar-13 00:53:03

Any which way, he was legally parked so I don't think I could get all upset about it.

If the person who got out is not disabled he is breaking the law.

If I go shopping with my carer I park in the BB space, if he is popping into a shop and I don't get out of the car I don't.

manicinsomniac Wed 20-Mar-13 22:53:29

I'm really surprised by this thread - I thought it would be a unanimous YANBU!

If the person who left the car had no disability then there is no difference between the situation the OP describes and the able bodied drivers who sneak into disabled spaces 'just for a minute or two' who always get a resounding YABU. Weird that people view these two situations differently imo.

It's also weird that the OP is being slated for posting about a 'non issue that doesn't concern her/him' If it was an able bodied driver abusing the space (with no disabled passenger of course) it wouldn't affect the OP any more but she would be applauded if she had spoken up and nobody would have said a thing about it not being her business on here.

Just because something doesn't affect you personally doesn't make it ok or unworthy of complaining about.

TheChaoGoesMu Wed 20-Mar-13 22:47:26

The blue badge holder is allowed to do that. Theres no rule that says the badge holder has to get out of the car, although it would be more desirable for him/her to move to a different space if they aren't getting out.

CloudsAndTrees Wed 20-Mar-13 22:38:46

Perhaps they made a judgement based on the space available and the time they would be taking and came to the reasonable conclusion that they were highly unlikely to inconvenience anyone else so they decided to do something they are allowed to do and used a parking space.

Or perhaps the blue badge holder needed to get home for a wee.

noclue2000 Wed 20-Mar-13 22:32:16

I have a blue badge question..
Husband and wife on my street, husband is bb holder, wife is driver. If husband is not in the car is wife able to park in bb space and display the badge so that the husband can then have easier access to the car? The space is on our street, the woman's car is always in the space, even when the husband is out at work.

MaryZeZJezuzIzntZombiedYet Wed 20-Mar-13 22:21:39


You are on the opposite side Chaos. Like the Top Gear Cool/Uncool wall grin

WorraLiberty Wed 20-Mar-13 22:19:14

I was just thinking of my Dad, Travelin

He's nearly 81 and on a good day he'd give most teenagers a run for their money grin

But he's got angina so on a bad day, he really need his badge.

TravelinColour Wed 20-Mar-13 22:17:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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