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to say its rubbish, that WOHMs dont have so much tidying to do...'leave a tidy house, come home to a tidy house'?

(155 Posts)
KhallDrogo Fri 25-Jan-13 22:19:05

I've read it on many a thread now....WOHM don't have so much to do, because kids are in childcare setting all day, get picked up, brought home-dinner, bath bed- no mess confused

I reckon mess-made can be plotted against time, and there is a maximum mess, where no more mess is possible, when everything is out of the cupboards and on the floor already and covered in crumbs and spilt juice. Here the graph plateaus

My kids can reach 'maximum mess' in approximately an hour. Mess saturation point

On the days I work, I definitely have as much/more to do than the days I am at home, and less time to do it in

catgirl1976 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:31:26

Well, no but if someone said they could, I missed that

JeezyOrangePips Sat 26-Jan-13 13:34:55

Both? Look after your kids while out at work? Most places don't allow that.

Unless you are a WAHM, which isn't really what this thread was originally about.

meadow2 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:36:00

Yeah my kids come to work with me and have done for the last 4 years.

JeezyOrangePips Sat 26-Jan-13 13:38:17

Gosh, you must havd a very understanding employer.

I think you win the prize for hardest working, looking after the kids while working!

girliefriend Sat 26-Jan-13 13:40:51

kids go with to work with you?? confused That must be fun for them hmm

Anyhoo YANBU although I am surprised at how much extra mess there is on weekends etc but yes the house still gets messy even with me and dd out of the house for 9 hours a day!!!

city1984 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:42:36

"Going out to lunch and toddler groups is not the same as being out working all day. It does not tire you out where you are a zombie by 5oclock.

Working parents do all what SAHP's do with working added on top.

city1984 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:44:04

A quote earlier on this thread. Sorry pressed send too soon.Is that really what people think life as a sahm with young children is?

meadow2 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:45:03

Its not really hard now.It has been about 2 years ago as dc1 used to tantrum and kick the gate in and scream and I mean loud.Used to be dead embarassing and people would say oh is that your dc? Cringe.It used to be harder during that stage, and I used to think I would go mental.Its easy now as after that dc1 got over tantrums and now I have my other dc there and its fine.

I am much more organised now and have routines and so I can do school runs in between and all the chores after work/school run.

KatieScarlett2833 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:46:02

Are you my DH!
Have teen DD 17 and DS 16
My hall looks like a particularly dirty converse warehouse wink
And the laundry?
Someone at work mentioned a " half load" recently. My machine will never have that easement....

meadow2 Sat 26-Jan-13 13:46:14

girlie - I work with children.

atacareercrossroads Sat 26-Jan-13 13:47:49

Hohoho <hollow laugh>

Yadnbu op. Wohm have exactly the same amount of housework and less time to do it in. Anyone who says different are to be ignored

jamdonut Sat 26-Jan-13 14:04:23

My house is NEVER tidy. DH and I both work, DS1 works part-time/college full-time, and DD1 and DS2 are at senior school.

There is ALWAYS piles and piles of washing to do. I've given up on ironing unless absolutely necessary. We have major clearouts from time to time, but the "stuff" that we have around us never seems to get any less. DH IS a good cleaner, I am rubbish.He has major moans about the amount of stuff that is where it shouldn't be,regularly.
I do the majority of the shopping, cooking , and ferrying kids around places (as only I drive). We are all just naturally untidy people, and try as we might (and we really do try!) , not to collect clutter, it just is there. blush
We are both exhausted after a day's work, and spending hours doing housework on top of what we do (DH at Tesco,me a TA in a primary school where I already spend much of the day tidying up after other people) just doesn't hold much appeal.

nickelbabe Sat 26-Jan-13 14:06:29


leave a messy house, come back to a messy house.

the child is a maelstrom of chaos.
one second after being removed from carriage, the house is a tip!
then she moves upstairs.

and she's here at work with me too, so it's even worse! she's got her own play area, but once that full of crap, she escapes and pulls stock off the shelves.

nailak Sat 26-Jan-13 16:13:07

"Going out to lunch and toddler groups is not the same as being out working all day. It does not tire you out where you are a zombie by 5oclock.

Working parents do all what SAHP's do with working added on top."

how can WOHP do the same as SAHP if there are under fives in the house? seriously, WOHP do not do look after their kids and deal with their mess and activities for the time that they are at work, which in general tends to be the majority of the waking hours of the child, so how can they be doing the same and working on top?

nailak Sat 26-Jan-13 16:17:30


Yadnbu op. Wohm have exactly the same amount of housework and less time to do it in. Anyone who says different are to be ignored"

Do you tidy up lunch things? and hoover after lunch? do you organise creative activities and then clean up after painting/sticking/sand and water play/cooking? do you take kids to park and then have to change your clothes and clean your shoes etc because of mud/rain/snow, and then hoover your house again as while playing the sand pit sand manages to somehow hide itself everywhere in dcs nappies etc? Do you have to walk miles a day for different school/nursery drop offs/pick ups/toddler groups?

If you do all these things then yes it is exactly the same amount of work, if not then in cannot be.

meadow2 Sat 26-Jan-13 16:28:32

Most mums I know do most ofvthat and work part time so only abput 20/30hours and then do all those things round working 8-2 or whatever.Same as going out to a group but just you are working.

Notanexcitingname Sat 26-Jan-13 16:29:32

ime it is not the mess but the dirt and dust and spills. Of courset it depends on the ages of the children, but the difference in the amount of housework that needs doing now I have a child at home (and one at school) compared to one in childcare all day is large. I'd say hoovering needs to be done probably four times more frequently, I wouldn't like to think about how infrequently I mopped floors, whereas now it is once a week, and the bathrooms need doing more often as well (although this is also a consequence of children out of nappies and independently toileting).

I will admit to having become more houseproud, since I'm now in the house to notice, but I do think housework has increased. I agree about the mess, though. Children can create a bombsite in nanoseconds.

MrsMelons Sat 26-Jan-13 16:30:53

When I work till 630 its fine as there is not so much time for mess as its usually bath, stories and bed but on the days we are home between 330 and 5 it really seems to make no difference at all - plenty of time to make plenty of mess!

atacareercrossroads Sat 26-Jan-13 16:36:04

Yes, pretty much the same level. Im not getting into a sahm v Wohm argument either as both are just as hard in their own way. But sadly the kids don't stop wearing clothes that will need washing, eating, shitting, making a mess and need taking places just because I work grin

Alibabaandthe40nappies Sat 26-Jan-13 16:36:31

WOHPs do NOT do everything a SAHM does.

If your children are in childcare all day then they are being fed, cleared up after, changed, entertained by someone else. All of which a SAHP does for themselves.

And I definitely find that there is less to do at home the days we are all out of the house for most of it.

meadow2 Sat 26-Jan-13 16:38:53

Some do manage both,but even then if you have routines it shouldnt be too hard.organisation is the key,I have found because I used to think it was hard to do to.

catgirl1976 Sat 26-Jan-13 16:38:57

Of course WOHMs have less childcare to do than SAHMs

But they have the same amount of housework to do

Which is what the thread is about

atacareercrossroads Sat 26-Jan-13 16:40:46

Oh yea, I just on my arse all day at work relaxing ;) . It's the same level of 'busyness' just somewhere else with big kids that also need arses wiping

KhallDrogo Sat 26-Jan-13 16:41:22

meadow yes I finish work to pick the kids up, from 2 different settings, on my bike. And do cooking/go to the park etc before/after going home for tea....

Alibabaandthe40nappies Sat 26-Jan-13 17:01:12

catgirl strictly speaking it is about tidying - which there is definitely more of to do if you are at home all day, or in and out of the house multiple times to toddler group, school run and so on rather than just leaving in the morning and coming back at 6pm.

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