Ok, I probably am so it's better I vent on here than to anyone we know...
We both had our first dc's within 3 days of each other, now we are expecting and this time EDD's are only a week apart. We see each other a lot and our dc's get on and we do offload on each other. I'm finding her attitude to this pregnancy wearing though.
It's a planned much wanted baby but she really isn't taking care of herself. We entered the pregnancy far over a healthy weight, and with the attitude she doesn't care. Now she is pregnant her diet is ridiculous, my own is far from perfect but hers must be in the top 0.1% of unhealthy. She had her last dc early due to high bp and this one looks like it's complicated. Also it looks like she may have GD, although the three blood tests haven't confirmed it. Sugar in the urine may be due to her diet she reckoned. I thought she was joking and laughed when she told me she'd had a twirl, coke and a twix (and whatever breakfast was) before a 10am appointment-she got uppity with me as she wasn't.
It's getting to me on two levels,
1- She's on the phone at least once a day to tell me of joint problems, sugar in urine, high bp etc. All of which she could manage better with a better diet. I get frustrated she won't help herself. It's very much the attitude of I can eat what I want/ I have a right to/ skinny people look ill... I waste some nights away listening
2-She'd be devastated if anything happened to her baby, I'm scared for her and care about her and find it emotionally draining. It's hard to see someone I care about potentially hurting herself or her family.
I try to help, even to the point of inviting her round a lot for lunch and offering different (very simple) meals I'll do. She turns her nose up like I offer poo, it's not rabbit food at all. Just proper meals rather than snacks. I tried to gently ask her if she wanted to change her diet (we didn't speak for a week after).
I'm at the point of finding it stressful and picking up the phone less, which makes me feel like a cow. I've got my own worries though and can't always be leant on. I don't want to loose a friend though, otherwise we get on great. I feel like a cow because if I'm honest I'd be more supportive if I didn't feel it was a little self-inflicted. I don't know the root of why she does it, she seems very confident, happy and has it all, but obviously this might not be the case.
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To be losing time for pregnant friend...
8 replies
Tallylo · 11/11/2012 19:51
OP posts:
Kethryveris ·
11/11/2012 20:27
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quietbatperson ·
11/11/2012 20:45
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