To ask for your positive experiences of Cafcass?(5 Posts)
I know I am already BU for using AIBU to canvass answers quickly but I'm hoping you'll overlook that
I have had cause to Google around for other people's experiences and dealings with Cafcass and outside of the official Cafcass and court information, the tales I have found are overwhelmingly negative. Terrifyingly so in some cases.
I know that no one leaves good reviews when they get the service they expect so am hoping that there are plenty of good, positive stories to balance out the negative complaints, and that you won't mind sharing yours with me to reassure me that it isn't all doom and gloom and stacked in one side's favour.
Cafcass were involved with my dh's children when his ex stopped him seeing them. She had made many false accusations in court as to why he couldn't see them (like trying to kill her, contstant domestic violence, neglecting children, being on drugs all the time, that sort of thing, all untrue) but cafcass after speaking with my 2 dsd still recommended unsupervised contact. It's good they only really take into account what the children say (if they are old enough) and not so much what either parent says. My dsd said after they felt comfortable talking to the cafcass lady. For the record, dsd are now living with me and dh so cafcass really did help us in our situation.
Why are cafcass involved with you?
My until recently largely absent ex has decided he wants more contact with our DC and that going through the courts is the best way to do that. I am not having a good time of it with Cafcass as they seem uninterested in my views and so far haven't asked the children what they want at all, despite having arranged a schedule of contact that suits their father and issued a court order requiring me to make them attend, hence my initial Googling to see if my experience was unusual.
I am glad to hear that you found them helpful, roadrunner I was hoping that my thread has been deemed too boring for replies, rather than no one having anything positive to say so it is reassuring to hear that it ended well for you, thank you.
Cafcass are involved in disputes so there is always going to be 50% happy parties and 50% unhappy. Guess which ones leave the negative feedback?
IME they listen to the kids and yes they shouldn't be too interested in what you think/say. Only the children views/feelings are important.
That is exactly why I was asking, shewhowines so that I could hear from the happy 50%. I would hope that it was more than 50% tbh, and that the unhappy people would be a very small percentage since I imagine it usually ends up as a middle ground between what both parents want and should ultimately be in the best interest of the child, so only the most unreasonable parent would be unhappy if the resulting decision made their child happy.
I completely agree that the children's views are of paramount importance, although I would disagree that what the parents say is unimportant. At the very least it may indicate where problems lie and a way to resolve them. In that case, I believe both parents views should be listened to equally.
Have you had many dealings with cafcass, shewhowines? Your post sounded like you had had multiple dealings with them, through work maybe?
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