Following cutted up pear...

[Dramajustfollowsme]

AIBU to have a massive tantrum because my DMummy would not let me wipe her bottom? She actually can be a bit strange about the toilet. For some reason, she likes to keep the door shut. If I actually manage to get into the bathroom, she doesn't seem to be enthralled by my dancing routines.
Last week, she was having a pee and stopped before I was able to look in the pot. She didn't respond to my demand to go again.
I threw a tantrum today as a last resort. I've tried unravelling all the toilet roll, putting her jewellery in the loo and putting liquid soap on the floor. Nothing seems to work. I mean, she wipes my bottom and puts nappies on me.
Little Miss Bossy, aged 17 months.

[thefudgeling]

YABU

[JeezyOrangePips]

YANBU

How are you supposed to learn about things if your mummy doesn't let you see what's going on? You aren't even two, you have an awful lot of things to get to know about.

Next time, try putting her jewellery in your nappy when it's dirty.

[lisaro]

Leave the bast (cough) errr bugger!!

[FayeKinitt]

My Mummy won't let me look either! But I need to check if she's having a yellow wee or a red wee so I can tell strangers in Tesco!

Love Toddler Kinitt x

[Lueji]

You're lucky your mummy doesn't throw a screaming fit when you do all those things in a tantrum. And doesn't make you sit on the floor for a whole minute.

[ivykaty44]

throw your dummy out the pram and see what happens

[FireOverBabylon]

throw the nailbrush down the loo whilst she's getting dressed, before she has chance to flush it. She'll do a dance of her own then.

Toddler Babylon 3.2

[lisaro]

Put a pretty scratch on Mummy's car to remind her of you, especially when she's unable to drive it herself for a few more weeks due to being on crutches still.

Toddler Lisaro (18.4).

[diddl]

Why does mummy pee in a pot?

[flyoverthegoldenhill]

just wait till she gets in the bath and you can try on her brand new lippy - it looks good especially round your eyes !

[JollyToddler]

Aibu to refuse to take the orange penicillin? She's tried a spoon, a syringe, mixing it with water and mixing it with milk. It's the final straw today, really.

I'm not quite feeling myself today and she insists on feeding me purple liquid, then thick orange stuff. She has also dragged me to see someone who has prodded me and listened to my chest with a cold thing, AND she keeps taking my temperature. Nasty woman. I would swap her for a new one if her cuddles weren't required today.

JollyToddler's Toddler, aged 1.5

[flyoverthegoldenhill]

Jolly I hope you let them see how good your lungs are. They soon stop prodding when you SSSSSSSSSSSSCCCCCCCCCCCCRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

[ApplePippa]

OP, I am twice your age, been round the block a bit longer, and feel I can teach you a thing or two.

If you really want revenge, I suggest going down the sleep torture route. To get started, refuse point blank to nap all day. Don't give in to your DM's best efforts to rock / sing / drive / push in the buggy to sleep, and make sure you stay really grumpy all day because you're over tired.

Then, when DM has wasted hours trying to get you off and has given up, just quietly fall asleep in front of the TV just before tea time. 5pm is the perfect time to do this - DM will be lulled into thinking she'll have you asleep good and early and will be looking forward to a long and peaceful evening.

Resist all efforts to be woken up after only a few minutes. This will spoil the plan. Make sure you have at least a lovely restful half hour of sleep. This should keep you going until around 9pm, although my personal best is 11pm.

Make sure you wake at least twice in the night, then insist on starting the next day at your usual time of 5.30am. Continue with the overtired and grumpy theme until it is time to go out to whatever activity DM has planned for that morning. You can then fall asleep on the way, and make up for all the lost sleep by napping all through the said activity.

Your DM will be so happy with you .

ApplePip (now aged 3, with a phd in sleep issues).

[flyoverthegoldenhill]

applepip you are my hero !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ApplePippa]

Thank you

[CondoleezzaRiceKrispies]

OP, you are NBU, some mummies are silly and think that they can wipe their bottom by themselves. This is blatantly wrong, everyone knows somebody else wipes your bottom while you kick your legs as fast as you can while shouting 'no like it'.

The mother I own today tried to tell me a donkey was a horse. Luckily it was small enough for me to pick up so I could throw it at her head to help her get a really good look at it. She agreed then that it was a donkey.

CondolittleRiceKrispies 2.3

[flyoverthegoldenhill]

No Royal Babies around then ?