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To feel my dds hurt

(7 Posts)
Leena49 Tue 02-Oct-12 19:56:58

My dd (7) has been best friends with another girl through reception and year 1 but now they are in year 2 the other girl is wanting to play with another little girl more and my dd came home today a little upset by this. My dd gets to see less of her as they are on different tables for literacy, numeracy etc as they seem to be streamed according to level of reading ability etc.I am mad at myself for feeling so sensitive about it but I feel her pain. AIBU?

HecateHarshPants Tue 02-Oct-12 20:00:31

no. You always feel it, sometimes more keenly than they do! It's part and parcel of being a parent.

However, logically you know that kids change friends a lot. And even a little thing like being at a different table and interacting with different children makes this happen. It's fun to make a new friend, get to know someone new! It's no reflection on your daughter that she's found another friend. You need to encourage your daughter to do the same. They'll still be friends.

monkeysbignuts Tue 02-Oct-12 20:03:23

aww no your not. I worry about my kids having no one to play with or falling out with there friends. I think its natural to want your kids to be happy.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Tue 02-Oct-12 20:07:14

I always feel it, sometimes more than they do .But I do think you have to guard against

A expressing too much emotion
B projecting your own past hurts onto your child

A degree of objectivity is helpful, as is encouraging a positive attitude. It's bloody hard though

Leena49 Tue 02-Oct-12 20:25:58

Yes you are absolutely right. We had a chat about how her older sister has lots of best friends not just one. It's so silly really and wish it didn't upset me. Her dad just doesn't get why I feel her hurt.

thebody Tue 02-Oct-12 20:34:04

No it's not silly at all its being a good mom.

However as you know kids swop and change friends and of course gain new ones.

Encourage your dd to make as many friends as possible, have lots to tea((refuse to use stupid term play date).

Whatever never approach the mother of the other child, in my experience it's a fact that mums argue and fall out over their kids disagreements and friendships, while the kids have long since made up and happy.

MrsTerryPratchett Tue 02-Oct-12 20:44:22

I can't stand when DD (less than 2) waves at someone and they don't wave back. I'm going to be a gibbering wreck when she gets to this stage.

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