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to NOT want to think of them sitting there in the buff?

(23 Posts)
ChaosTrulyReigns Thu 27-Sep-12 13:21:08

Because the audience might twist it round and imagine me all nude and stuff.

Gah. Hatehatehate speaking in front of a group - - I go beetrooty and, honestly, my voice cracks as though I'm going to start crying. Truth. sad

Please sent me reslove and tips.

<<beggy eyes>>

EmpressOfTheGoldOceans Thu 27-Sep-12 13:24:59

Good luck Chaos. What are you speaking about?

IamtheZombie Thu 27-Sep-12 13:25:17

Take a couple of slow deep breaths before you begin.

Pick out a few people scattered around the room and, as you speak, look from on to the other. If you are using notes, look back up at a different person each time you glance at the notes. That gives the audience the impression that you are including all of them in what you are saying.

Relax. You will be fine. You have to be. You're our Chaos and you are invincible.

StickyProblem Thu 27-Sep-12 13:28:14

The voice cracking, red face etc are just physical symptoms, you need to get your body more relaxed. It's a vicious circle - you are scared, your voice cracks, then you feel even more scared, then your face goes red etc.etc. It's just physical symptoms though.

Take deep breaths before you go on, don't be afraid to take a few moments beforehand to calm yourself down. You don't have to be chatting and laughing with people who have nothing to do but sit and watch. One of the best and most experienced presenters I know goes and fiddles with the projector for about 15 minutes before presenting, he won't talk to anyone - once he's off stage he's fine.

Don't think about the audience - think about what you are talking about. Concentrate on getting your message across.

Practice your talk, with the clothes you're going to wear, and the shoes. Make it feel as familiar as possible. Practice in front of your DH/DC/friends if you can - do everything to make it less unusual.

When you are up there, try and look some of them in the eye. It reminds you you are talking to individuals, not a homogenous mass. If anyone yawns/falls asleep/rolls eyes, remember that is about THEM not YOU. Some people just can't concentrate on people speaking, while for others it's the best way for them to take in information.

They are not all sitting there thinking about you nude, they are thinking about what you are saying, or how nice it is to have a sit down, or what they had for tea.

Good luck!! When is it?

scentednappyhag Thu 27-Sep-12 13:28:47

Try just making each point over and over again in quick succession, MN loves you for it after all wink
Good luck!

HeathRobinson Thu 27-Sep-12 13:49:15

What's it for?

If it's a set speech that you're giving, then time it at home so you can get your voice pacing right.

Give the speech standing in front of a full length mirror/film yourself so you can see what gestures work or whether you're standing like a waxwork.

ChaosTrulyReigns Thu 27-Sep-12 14:19:50

It's just delivering a fact based speech to an audience of allegedly mildly interested people.

Sigh.

I will take on your advice, but won't be repeating myself and prolonging the agony. wink

It's tonight, folks.

Gulp.

Do you think a small bottle of wine might help?

IamtheZombie Thu 27-Sep-12 14:28:57

Chaos, you will be absolutely fine. But Zombie would advise saving the wine for afterwards.

Have a (((( hug )))) instead.

StickyProblem Thu 27-Sep-12 15:12:46

Don't drink before! Drink AFTER. Focus on the facts. Practice. You'll be fine smile

ChaosTrulyReigns Thu 27-Sep-12 15:34:16

You lot are not fun.

Dutch courage, it's called.

UnChartered Thu 27-Sep-12 15:40:28

i think you should deliver the talk thus

but in leopard print [wunk]

good luck, you'll be fab grin

WilsonFrickett Thu 27-Sep-12 15:53:09

Take one deep breath and feel it going right to the bottom of your belly.
Unclench your toes. I know they're curled up like frozen croissants in there.
Release your knees, just a tiny bit.
Now just talk. Look them in the eye and talk.
Pause.
Talk a little bit more.
And you're done.

GiserableMitt Thu 27-Sep-12 15:55:06

[wunk] grin

ChaosTrulyReigns Thu 27-Sep-12 19:01:22

Frozen criossants has really made me smile - I may have to work that into my speech.

grin

IamtheZombie Thu 27-Sep-12 22:13:06

Are you home yet, Chaos? How did it go?

Here, have some wine.

TalcAndTurnips Thu 27-Sep-12 22:29:34

Chaos!

Are you a sleb now?

<< queues outside stage door for autograph >>

ChaosTrulyReigns Thu 27-Sep-12 23:28:38

Yup it's all over and I have Pimm's!

grin

I noticed a massive error in the presentation 10 minutes before kick off, so had to amend that. Sigh. Fecking spreadshits

Them forgot to hand the handouts out.
Sigh.

Spilled my coffee.
Sigh.

Then the 2 speakers before me said stuff I needed to say. So I had to wing the bloody speech - adlibbing like a good un. NOT my strength. Fucksale.

Chaos truly reigns.

See?

EmpressOfTheGoldOceans Thu 27-Sep-12 23:34:03

But you did it!!!!

Nagoo Thu 27-Sep-12 23:43:12

wine

IamtheZombie Thu 27-Sep-12 23:53:07

Zombie leads the standing ovation!

ripsishere Fri 28-Sep-12 05:28:29

And Rips gives another round of applause.

EmpressOfTheGoldOceans Fri 28-Sep-12 07:40:50

thanks

WilsonFrickett Fri 28-Sep-12 09:50:46

<Cheers, applause, wolf whistles>

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