I live in France, my mum's in England and I'm 9 weeks PG with number one after having a miscarriage earlier in the year. My mum was no support whatsoever (didn't phone me for 10 days when I was taking the pills and then having to go into hospital) despite saying she'd 'be there for me 100%'.
We have a funny relationship generally but she thinks we are great pals and that she is a great source of general comfort and support to me, which couldn't be further from the truth for many years now.
Yesterday she called to say she'd booked flights to come and see me for a visit (she never visits hardly and we don't speak that often). I told them I was pregnant again and that I'm doing everything to be relaxed. DH and I also work from home and are renovating our house. She is coming the day after the 12 week scan.
The bottom line is, if all's well at 12 weeks I want to just celebrate with my husband as it's been a rocky road getting here, and if all is not well I don't want her here thinking she's 'supportive' when actually she'll be all 'oh don't mind me, I'm really easy going...' but then is histrionic, high maintenance and generally a pain in the arse, whilst going on about how much she needs a break.
Long story short...AIBU for saying 'don't come'? BTW she does not take hints at all. On the phone I said 'maybe this is not the best time' about 3 times. I need to be blunt, even though that makes her hysterical.
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AIBU?
To not want my mum to visit?
19 replies
googietheegg · 17/10/2011 17:37
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