Awful boastful children- why don't parents tell them

[PinkPoncho]

off? We have to avoid this one on the school run, he gallops up to tell us all about how he's a free reader and mine isn't, how he's so wonderful at well everything...he's so much bigger than my ds...it goes on and on...his mum just ignores it..

Today he was openly laughing to his mates about how my (other)ds didn't even know his own name (he's 2)

You'd think parents would tell them to stop it, I'm actually starting to find it embarrassing. They are 7 yrs old btw

[TrenteSix]

Maybe they do tell them (kindly, repeatedly, and firmly) but the kid doesn't listen because he's 7 and frankly is a bit of a work in progress still?

[PinkPoncho]

But she doesn't. I've never seen her, anyway.

[activate]

why don't you tell him it's not nice to be so boastfull or rude

[Proudnreallyveryscary]

I agree with you OP

[PinkPoncho]

i don't really feel it's my place. (his mum walking along beside). I did at my house though, once. Just said we are all different and special or something.

[Ireneiswaiting]

I know a kid like this, it does my nut in. Luckily DS doesn't notice the constant boasting and belittling of him by his older friend.

[MissBetsyTrotwood]

I don't understand. You've never seen his mum but she was walking next to him and he's been to your house?

He sounds rather insecure to me and with a lot of social learning to be done. I agree with TrenteSix - maybe he does get told but it's just not going in yet. Poor kid - if you find it annoying then I'm sure the children will too and he'll need to keep on being told that this is not the way to make friends!

[vincentvangogh]

perhaps he has some trouble with his social skills. Perhaps his mother has told him time and time again not to boast and she doesn't want to do it in public.

[diddl]

I think it´s sad.

Sounds as if he might not get much attention at home.

Canßt think any of the kids he mixes with will stand it for long.

[Hulababy]

I would tell him myself not to be so unkind or impolite when talking about your cildren, and simply answer his comments about his own achievements with a simple "that/s nice."

[PinkPoncho]

MissBetsy I meant I'd never seen his mum tell him off, not never seen her. he came to our house once only. As a favour to the mum. Don't know them that well.

[skybluepearl]

just tell them they are being very rude and it's bad to put someone else down to make themselves look good.

[BupcakesandHaunting]

I'd trip him up tomorrow if he starts.

[thisisyesterday]

oh i hate this too. we had "gloat boy" at ds1's previous school and he was just awful.
his mum just used to stand there and listen to him telling DS1 how much better he was than him and how he had this, that and the other and ds1 didn't...

i just said "that's lovely gloatboy" and talked to ds1 and tried to steer him away.
it's really vile behaviour IMO and I wish parents would stop thinking it's just cute and "honest" and tell their kids how unkind it is

[Goldenbear]

YANBU, my DS has just started reception and the boy of a mother who has befriended me constantly boasts about being the winner of made up games when we are walking home from school. i.e walking on a wall, running to a bin, throwing a conker. My DS gets called a looser by him- DS is completely unaware they are even in some Kind of competition. In the climbing the railings 'competition', DS got pulled off the wall by this boy because he thought DS was trying to beat him. The second time DS grazed himself and was crying. The mum told him off for that but with the boasting over winning she just remarks on How he loves to win. She once said that it was a great friendship the boys has as my DS didn't seem bothered about winning and that he seemed to like following her DS??
IME you only have look at the parents' behaviour to see why some children are like this!

[ChippingIn]

Just say 'That's lovely Fred' - it wont hurt you. If he's being mean just say 'That's not nice Fred, X is only 2, still very small' - it wont hurt him. Just because his parents aren't parenting him, it doesn't mean you can't stand up for your own kids.

[happyhorse]

I'm afraid I'm not as grown up as some and would have to answer in my DS's defense.

"I'm a free reader" - well DS is good at so many things
"I'm bigger than DS" - Well you still might end up smaller when you're both grown up.

[FearfulYank]

Ugh, how annoying!

It could be that he has no attention at home...or it could be that he has far too much.

[Gigondas]

Very annoying but completely agree with golden bear that usually parents explain behaviour

[WhereYouLeftIt]

"i don't really feel it's my place."
I've always thought that this way of thinking creates problems. If children grow up thinking that only their parents are allowed to tell them off, surely they are more likely to have problems later on when they are admonished by teachers, employers, police etc.?

That's my excuse for telling unrelated children off and I'm sticking to it!

[Goldenbear]

Fearfulyank, it is a very annoying personality trait to have and you are hugely failing your children if you don't help them to recognise this unless of course the parent doesn't have a clue either!