To talk to school about DD's racist comments?

[BakerBinky]

DD said yesterday that all babies are lovely except for 'brown babies'...... We had a talk to her about it and she said a girl in her class who can be quite mean to DD and others said it to her... I Find this particulary shocking as she is mixed race herself. She said again this evening that 'brown babies' are horrible. I'm worried, should I talk to the school?

[HecateGoddessOfTheNight]

Yes.

[BakerBinky]

DD is UK/Asian/American Indian

[cheesesarnie]

yes.a girl in her class is being horrible to her.

[lljkk]

I wouldn't. I would work with her to see why it's a daft statement but I would hold back for now on saying anything that will get logged and pursued formally.
Sorry, but I have a horror of the excesses of bureaucracy.

[Oggy]

We had something very similar with our son, he came out with a racist comment that he absoultely didn't get from us! He then told us that he heard children in the playground saying it.

I did speak to the teacher about it the next day and they took it extremely seriously and I had a call from the Headmaster later that morning.

They gave the children an extra PSE lesson to talk about differences and I haven't heard any more such stuff from my son since.

So in summary, yes, I think you should speak to the school.

[BakerBinky]

DD looks kind of Southern European in skintone so I'm not sure if it's aimed at her of not, or if it's something the girl has repeated after hearing her parents saying it??

DD's school is quite multi cultural so I want to nip this in teh bud before any other children hear it.

[Oggy]

To add, of course you can talk to your child about such things yourself (we obviously did) but if the other children aren't getting the same message then your child will still be exposed to it.

[RitaMorgan]

How old are the children?

It's quite common for young children to come out with things about liking/not liking particular hair colours or skin tones - it often isn't racism as an adult understands it, it's more basic and based on how people look rather than a concept of race.

That's not to say that schools and parents shouldn't be proactive about talking to children about differences, being kind, all getting along etc.

[hocuspontas]

How old is she? Sometimes children are referring to hair colour. Go carefully, you only have your dd's word that this other girl said it, it could have been anyone. I would use your judgement whether to take it further and obviously be alert for other references. Would I personally say anything at this stage? No.

[BakerBinky]

They're aged 6

[Sidalee7]

So sad, definately talk to school.
In my school in the early 80's a mixed race friend had the most awful comments made to her by girls of 7, so awful I can not repeat them. Her mother raised the issue very assertively and it was well dealt with by the school.

[worraliberty]

I would definitely have a word with the school

But don't automatically assume the child who originally said it was being racist.

To her, she may be simply expressing a preference with childish honesty.

She might also have said all babies are lovely except male ones...and I doubt we'd be on here accusing her of being 'sexist'.

Obviously this needs to be nipped in the bud but please don't assume there was racist intent from a child so young as it's not always the case.

[Indaba]

Talk to school but go easy. My children are at very very multi race school (which we all love) but at aged 6 or so they get aware of skin tone and say things that can be misinterpreted...they are exploring colour...and differences.....let school know you are aware and support....i would expect the school to address this,