Dh and I were so in love for years despite coping with hard times , mainly dhs depression however since we got
married and had a baby last year we have had nothing but non stop stress , I had severe pnd then my husband had another bout of depression then my pnd got worse.
On top of that our financial situation is dire and about to get much worse, I al desperatly looking for another job and dh should be too but so far hasn't bothered his arse yet again he is leaving everything down to me .
When he has depression or is in a bad mood due to his insomnia I feel he is having a constant go at me and when I retaliate he tells
me to fuck off or something along the lines of, I fucking am looking for a fucking job then he slams a door or storms out, after he is full
of apologies says he knows he needs to sort himself out but it never happens. I said to him it's like a man slapping a woman and being full
of apologies after, to
me they mean nothing, he gets upset and says he would never hit me (which I know) but the aggressive swearing is just as upsetting.plus my mum was severely beaten I'm front of me by her ex dh for years and we were all terrified of him, angry men still scare
me.
I am only twenty eight I haven't been out for years and I have no clothes makeup or spare cash for anything and it
might seem a small problem but on top of everything else it is making me miserable , I keep thinking life shouldn't be like this and after the childhood I had all I want is a normal happy life , I'm sorely tempted to run away from
it all as nothing I do (sorting payment plans for bills looking for jobs so dh doesn't have to work so he can manage his depression) makes a difference and with the swearing and snapping he is slowly eroding
my love.
I have a photo of us from a couple of years ago so happy and content looking it kills me everytime I look at it because we were the happiest couple in the world.
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AIBU?
To be disallusioned with married life.
17 replies
Offski · 03/07/2011 15:43
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