School trip

[whatever17]

My DS2 (11) is about to go on a week long school trip.

It is the Year 6 leaving trip to the IOW.

He really wants to go and I will let him - but I am really scared that he will kick off or go hysterical.

I am in London and his Dad is in Poole.

What if he flips out?

There will be no contact for the whole week!

[JackyJax]

What does 'flip out' mean for him? You need to tell him that it's ok to feel anxious, happy, excited, worried, etc when he's away from home. Then go through with him how to handle these emotions.

It's ok to feel uncomfortable emotions. It's our job as parents to guide our children through these and to show them some coping skills.

If your child has SN, however, then disregard above comment.

[whatever17]

Jacky - yes, he has SN and my older kid who is normal I sent without a backward glance.

[whatever17]

Madam - he will be with his class teacher and I think the Head who both know him well.

I think I will ask the teacher or Head for their mobile number and text them daily!

[JackyJax]

I've worked with SN pupils for 10 years hence why I understand that these students often need a bit of extra TLC with potentially stressful events.

I obviously don't know the nature of his needs but I think you could still possibly 'workshop' potential feelings with him and show him how to manage his fears.

There are lots of ways for kids with and without SN to manage fears. One practical idea which may sound naff is for the child to wear an elastic band on their wrist. Every time they feel anxiety they give it a little ping. The idea is that the elastic band is not very noticeable so peers don't mock you and it takes you out of your head space as you refocus on the (mild!) pain of a pinging band.

Additionally I'd talk with his teachers as to how they can make it easier for him and how they can 'talk him down' if he does flip out.

I think your idea of having teacher's number is a good one with some restrictions eg ask her to text you every morning and you'll text every night.

I think it's great that he's going on this trip- a big move for your little man. Kids are often more resilient than we think. Us adults however...

Anyhow, wishing you lots of luck with this latest step in your son's journey through life.
Cyber hug, Jacky

[Goblinchild]

When my DS went on his various residentials, the school wrote him a personal risk assessment, looking at the stress issues and what could be put in place to counter them. They also gave him a 'go to' person so that if things were starting to go pear-shaped, he knew who to speak to first. Not 1:1, just a person looking out for him.
They talked to me before hand, to see if I could add anything they didn't know about, or hadn't thought of.
He's been on several, and they have gone well.

[roisin]

Does he usually have TA support in school? Will there be TA support on the trip?

IME of organising school residentials they will have thought very carefully of what needs to be put in place to support children with SN.

If you still have concerns, I would ask to go in to school and have a meeting going through the issues you think they need to be aware of.

[LynetteScavo]

Has he ever held it together for an entire week in his life? If so, he will probably be OK. The school wouldn't let him go if they thought they couldn't handle him.

I wouldn't let DS go on the Y7 trip for 5 days, as I didn't think he could hold it together that long. I am letting him go on the Y7 3 day trip becasue I know he can be fine for that long.

What are the staff like who are going? Can they handle him?

when you say there will be no contact for a whole week...the teachers will have phones.

[Goblinchild]

OP, you said 'My DS2 (11) is about to go on a week long school trip.'
So if you want to do anything to help you worry less, you need to act quickly.