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AIBU?

to think random people should not kiss your children?

19 replies

winnybella · 23/12/2010 18:41

First of all, just to be clear- I don't mind strangers talking to my children, touching them or even telling them off, if deserved (community raising the young etc), so really am not precious, but...

But I just went to a shop with my 22mo DD, who is recovering from a really bad cold and this woman(who has seen DD few times before as I go there once or twice a month) comes around from behind the counter, runs up to DD, bends over from behind DD and starts kissing her on the face (couldn't see where exactly as woman's hair obscured the view). I ask her to stop as DD is screaming in fright, woman ignores me, finally get DD away, the woman starts making silly noises, DD is yelling, the woman starts to mock her and yell as well...

So, AIBU in not wanting strangers kissing my child, especially in the middle of a bloody flu season and not when said child is recovering from an infection? I hope she wasn't kissing her on the lips, eeewww. Arrrgh.

OP posts:

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winnybella · 23/12/2010 18:45

.

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Bunbaker · 23/12/2010 18:49

No you aren't BU at all. The very idea of strangers kissing DD is yuck, yuck, yuck. DD would find it even more yuck than me - she is 10 BTW.

I have just seen the statistics about swine flu on TV and would be even more alarmed for that reason.

Mahraih · 23/12/2010 19:01

That's weird - she should NOT be kissing your child. Socially inappropriate.

People seem to think that children don't have the right to personal space, and are just little toys to be played with. To be honest, I'd have been tempted to complain (however I'm an overreactor).

winnybella · 23/12/2010 19:02

I know-we're in France, the SF isn't so bad here (yet), but you just don't know, do you? And any cold or flu wouldn't be great now for a toddler that's still snotty and coughing. And I don't even want to think about any other things transmittable through kissing-arrrgh. Bloody woman.

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winnybella · 23/12/2010 19:04

Mahraih- I thinks she owns the shop, it's just a little tabac-ie shop selling cigarettes, stamps, sweets plus a bar. So I don't think there's anyone to complain to.

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mummyloveslucy · 23/12/2010 19:10

I say why not, my daughter kisses random strangers.

WriterofDreams · 23/12/2010 19:11

YANBU.

I often feel so sorry for little children who are mauled by everyone just because they're little. I got really annoyed at my mum once when I was a teenager because she randomly picked up my toddler cousin who understandably got a fright and started crying. My mum then made fun of him and told him to stop crying. It pissed me off so much that I firmly told her to put him down and leave him alone, so firmly that she did it right away. When she then had a go at me I calmly asked her how she would like it if she was happily going about her business and someone suddenly and without warning picked her off her feet and squeezed her, then made fun of her for being annoyed. Seeing as my mum barely even hugs her own children she had to grudgingly concede that she would be furious. It had never occurred to her that a small child might feel exactly the same way. I must have made an impression because I never saw her do that again. I always ask before I lift or kiss a small child and if they say no I just leave them alone. Apart at all from the infection risk which you are quite right to be worried about, it's just mean and wrong to invade someone's space and frighten them like that, no matter how young they are.

mummyloveslucy · 23/12/2010 19:13

Seriously though, it's not on. The woman actually sounds a bit strange.

bamboobutton · 23/12/2010 19:15

YANBU.

i don't want my dc catching other peoples colds, flu's or cold sores.

winnybella · 23/12/2010 19:21

I think she is a bit strange, mummyloveslucy-she is always very exicited-talking loudly, laughing somewhat hysterically etc. Still this...I couldn't believe my eyes. And there was nothing I could do short of pushing her away.I should have done that .

I hope DD didn't catch anything.

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cupcakebakerer · 23/12/2010 19:31

Oh don't be so silly. Of course she won't have caught anything. That's a very alarmist atiitude.

YANBU in terms of this woman kissing your child though - it sounds as though she is a bit of a local 'character' to me.

cupcakebakerer · 23/12/2010 19:32

attitude

winnybella · 23/12/2010 21:54

Yes, she must be. I went to the corner shop afterwards where I know the guy very well and said something about what happened and he went ' ah, elle, oui, oui' with a knowing look on his face

WOD- exactly, totally agree. Btw, did you ever 'come out'? I've been lurking on CW threads and I would love to know...

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MsKLo · 23/12/2010 22:38

YANBU

An what I trampoline hate Is when people kiss tiny babies' hands

Hands they put in their mouth all the time

Makes me want to scream! I tell them not to though an screw them If they don't like it

MsKLo · 23/12/2010 22:39

Trampoline should have said really

My iPhone is having meltdown!

Mowiol · 23/12/2010 22:58

Hmm, interesting..... this is a bit off topic but I have opinions about the kissing thing anyway - I always told my kids they never had to kiss or hug anyone if they didn't want to and I hated others making their kids hug or kiss me when the children clearly didn't want to if they didn't know me well or even if they were related.
I feel thats a mixed message - don't let anyone touch you inappropriately or invade our private space but you must kiss old Aunt Elsie!!
Well if the parent is bothered then they can kiss old Aunt Elsie

Mowiol · 23/12/2010 22:59

Not sure if that post made sense - but I know what I mean!!

winnybella · 23/12/2010 23:29

Agree, Mowiol.

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A1980 · 24/12/2010 00:42

That's just weird. I would never do that to a child I didn't know very well.

I only ever kissed the children I baby sat for as a teenager but I knew them VERY WELL!

It is inappropriate. What a weird woman

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