I'm having a wobbly today.
We've been linked with a little girl. My husband fell in love with her instantly, as soon as we saw the profile. I didn't but I am a naturally more cautious person.
CPR was what we expected and didn't throw up any issues that we weren't prepared to deal with.
But now we have met the social workers, foster carers etc and some health issues have come to light that we didn't know about. We had previously ruled out children with this issue.
My husband still wants to go ahead. I keep veering between yes and no. We're quite far into the link and only a few weeks from matching panel. I've talked to social services but they reassure me and say it's not that bad. I am a worrier at heart so maybe I am overthinking things and focusing too much on the 'bad'. I feel so conflicted and like no one is listening to me. The impact on my husband and relationship if I withdrew us now would be huge. But I will be the primary carer and my gut instinct is currently screaming "this isn't right!!" but then on other days, and at other times, it says "this child is a good fit." I suppose there's no way of knowing and I can't go entirely by gut instinct. But it is important.
Also, I like to research so I have read a lot about this condition. My husband is an intelligent guy but not as obsessive as me... he read some google results and has decided it will be fine. I don't think he's prepared for the reality and the social workers are definitely not preparing him.
Sorry for the long post.
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11 replies
gutinstinctadopt · 03/02/2020 21:51
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