Choosing Childcare

[Doodles12]

Hi, I'm completely new to posting but would really love to get some advice from fellow adopters. I am due to return part time to work in a few months and need to start thinking about organising childcare for my 2 year old daughter. Would anyone be able to give me any advice on what might be the best childcare options available, I have no extended family locally so will be reliant on finding a childminder or nursery locally, what things it might be important to ask or look for when choosing a suitable place?

[fasparent]

As an adoptive parent should be entitled too 15 hours a week free child care also £300 pupil premium per annum as from MAY this year see
//www.first4Adoption.org.uk for details, there is no financial criteria too both. Would contact your local LA for list of sure start, and children's centres , and LA supported nursery's should be on LA's Webb site., also could ask first4adoption for further advice. Criteria have too show nursery
Adoption,SGO or Residency court document (confidential) who then can submit application and funding too local LA.

[fasparent]

As an adoptive parent should be entitled too 15 hours a week free child care also £300 pupil premium per annum as from MAY this year see
//www.first4Adoption.org.uk for details, there is no financial criteria too both. Would contact your local LA for list of sure start, and children's centres , and LA supported nursery's should be on LA's Webb site., also could ask first4adoption for further advice. Criteria have too show nursery
Adoption,SGO or Residency court document (confidential) who then can submit application and funding too local LA.

[fasparent]

Sorry also applies within private sector , don't cost the LA's all is central GOV Funded

[Doodles12]

Thanks faparent I'm going to contact my LA to check eligibility for the 15 hours but don't think I can get pupil premium until DD is 3.
Thank you for you insight Jameme I too keep thinking about the pros and cons of childminder verses nursery. I want to make sure that I choose somewhere that will be able to support with any issues about adoption that might arise particularly the emotional impact and the importance of routines and continuity so wanted her to be with someone who had an understanding of this and my experience of nurseries has sometimes been with nursery nurses so young and inexperienced. Am I searching for the impossible?

[Thurlow]

The most important thing is your gut feeling. There are pros and cons to both nurseries and childminders, just on a practical front - nurseries are open more, for example, whereas childminder's might be more flexible and supportive.

I'd say visit as many nurseries and childminders as you can, and go with your gut feeling. When you find the right place you'll know, as you'll feel comfortable and confident and trust that this person/place will look after your child well.

[Threesocksnohairbrush]

Hello
I think Id look at both and go with the one you feel has most understanding of DS and his needs. DD went at a similar age to a lovely, small nursery near where I worked, and got on very well.
I can see the argument that childminder care, in the childminders home, might feel too much like another carer and another home. But on the other hand you might find one who really 'gets' DS and can give him small group care in a more relaxed environment.
I would look for stability of staff and low turnover. We had awful trouble when DDs key worker left, so id have hated her to be somewhere with very transient staff.
What's his temperament like - enjoys being with other kids or is he easily over stimulated and needs his own space?

[Threesocksnohairbrush]

Oops sorry, don't know why I read as DD!

Another thought, is she just 2 or nearly 3? If nearly 3 you might want to think about how pre school/nursery would fit in come September if that feels right for her. Which would be either a nursery with more pre school emphasis, or a childminder who could pick up/drop off at local pre school class.
All children are different and adopted children are more different than others, but DD started getting a bit bored with nursery the year she was rising four, and benefited from starting in the school nursery class.

[excitedmamma]

Children who are or have been in care are eligible for free 15 hours from age 2....we had to send a copy of the AO to the local council via the nursery and they fund it.

[Doodles12]

That's great advice, thank you. DD only turned 2 last week and she seems so young and vulnerable that I actually think a childminder or very small nursery setting might be next suited, I worry she'd get 'lost' in a larger nursery. For her I think it's the relationship with the adult is the most important, she is still only plays along side other children rather than joining in. The idea of a homely environment of a child minder appeals but wonder what impact this intimate relationship would have on the still bonding relationship I have with her. Has anyone had any negative experience this?

[excitedmamma]

our LO was 2.5yo and we are very lucky in finding a nursery that only takes in 8 children max.... just absolutely perfect... 3 adults max and she has amazed us at how well she has settled....

I really didn't think she'd take to it.... so thankful though

I wanted a nursery as oppose to a child minder for a similar reason someone else upthread posted - I didn't want it to feel like FC, or a home replacement.... something small yet different iyswim and preparation for school

I think you need to narrow down your options and go and see them - trust your gut feeling about them...

[Kewcumber]

I chose a childminder for the same reason that excitedmamma chose a nursery! DS was in an institutional setting when I adopted him and I was worried that a nursery would feel too much like his orphanage. IN fact having seen some nurseries they did really feel very similar. Not in a bad way just very similar in set up so I went for a childminder who had dogs and cats and her own children in a very busy household who I talked to beforehand about the potential issues with adopted children. One of the reasons I chose her (in addition to the fact that she had been recommended) is that one of the things she said to me was "Don;t worry if he needs to sit on my lap all day he can".

If your bond isn;t secure enough to deal with a good childminder then I's go as far as to say don;t go back to work yet. The answer to attachment issues isn;t imvho to expose tehm to other people but somehow engineer it so they don't bond. Its to either keep them close to you a while longer or to promote their bonding with a carer.

In DS's case it was easier for him to deal with one new person than to get used to a nursery of adults.

[Doodles12]

Dear Kewcumber those sound like very wise words! I absolutely love the sound of your childminder, that's exactly the environment I picture DD in. It's almost equally important that I have a connection with any chosen childcare provider as DD does, that way I will be able to communicate any concerns as they arise. I think my first step is to go visit as many childminders and small nurseries as possible as Thurlow and excitedmamma recommended and trust my gut feelings

[nothingcomestonothing]

I had a similar dilemma with my DS, who was 2 when he started childcare. I very strongly wanted him to go to nursery rather than be with a childminder in her home, as pp said so that the childcare setting didn't replicate FC. The local nursery had no places and I pushed and pushed, got him put at the top of the waiting list, had SW and health visitor intervening for me, I was convinced this was the only right option for DS. In the end after months of waiting the nursery didn't offer any places in his age group at all and I had to find an alternative.

I found a childminder who works with an assistant, so they can take 6 children, and all aged 2-3 so it's like a mini nursery. I was incredibly lucky to find her, she is very experienced, and also takes 2 year old funding so it saved me money. On the day I visited one little girl sat on the CMs lap the whole time crying - CM was endlessly patient, comforted her, told her it's okay to be sad, just perfect. She was so understanding of DS's separation anxiety, we started out with me and him both going for a couple of hours, then me staying a couple of hours then leaving him there for another hour, and gradually built up over time, now he goes 2 days a week 9-5.30 completely happily. He sometimes asks to go on other days! CM or assistant will text me and email me photos of what he's up to during the day, they're great. DS also started the preschool at DDs school in September 2 mornings a week and he struggles with that a lot more - more kids, physically bigger space, more noise, less 1-1 attention (though they are also lovely and have a lot of experience of SN). So although I was sure it wouldn't be, CM (the right CM) was the right choice for me.

One thing I would say is visit as many options as you can, and go with your gut feeling. DS's CM is 2 villages away from home and charges a bit more than others, but it's the right place for him. Also give yourself as long as you can for settling in, and beware of places with a set programme/timescale for this - unlike the majority of children, my DS's separation anxiety is based in reality, his main carer has disappeared twice in his short life already. My CM really gets that, and that's priceless. Hope you find something as good!

[Thebluedog]

I went back to work part time when my dd was 2. I initially put her nursery and she hated it, tears and tantrums, hysterics when I picked her up, the whole 9 yards.

I think it was just too busy and hectic for her, the nursery staff swapped and changed so she never had anyone on a consistent basis.

I then found a lovely childminder, my dd now loves going to her and much prefers the one to one contact and security she gives her. It's a it of a pain in the arse if she'd ever off sick or has holidays but it's far more suited to my dd.

I'd suggest you try both and see which sits best with your dc

[Doodles12]

Thank you for sharing that with me that's really insightful and heartwarming to know that there is such good quality childcare out there. The tips about settling in, noise, ratios and size or space are definitely factors I will take into consideration. Thank you for sharing your experience