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Has Covid Caused You To Feel More Distant From Your Family?

(12 Posts)
IfOnlyOurEyesSawSouls Sat 26-Sep-20 23:59:06

My parents & my sister used to come and visit us ( we live in a different city) very regularly and stay over.

My DH & I with our DC used to go over and stay with my parents.

We are a close family yet with covid i now feel more distant from my family due to the initial lockdown, not being able to visit , or hug etc etc .

Now that we can do those things (for the time being) we are anxious about staying over , having hugs with each other etc because those things obviously carry a risk.

My mum had covid & was hospitalised for 2 months so we are acutely aware of how dangerous it can be .

I feel sad because it's definitely affected relationships within the family and i find myself missing the hugs & tlc we shared .

I wondered if anyone else felt this way ?

No unpleasant comments please... covid has been extremely traumatic for me ( as it has for many )

OP’s posts: |
Paranoidmarvin Sun 27-Sep-20 08:37:33

Not for me. But my mum has mentioned she feels left out as all three in her house are Shielding.

Mooserp Sun 27-Sep-20 08:40:03

Apart from DC I haven't seen any family members at all. Definitely feel more distant!

DinosApple Sun 27-Sep-20 08:51:25

Yes I'm with you, it's been horrible and I miss my folks so much.
Zoom isn't the same. We've been to their house twice this year - but not indoors except to the toilet by the back door. They've been to ours once. No hugs and 2m distance. The DC used to love playing with their grandparents and are definitely more distant after six months. Ball games aren't the same as sitting and playing/reading or sewing together.

Totally understand why though as MIL died of Covid in May, but the whole thing completely sucks.

Me and DM are trying to work out how we can make Christmas better.

BogRollBOGOF Sun 27-Sep-20 09:13:57

Yup. Seen DGM once since Feb. Although ironically I saw DM (distant relationship in more than one way) twice on holiday as we were about an hour from her. Not seen any of the rest of my family. DH has seen his brother once.

Most family combinations are illegal under the stupid fucking rule of six.

Some family members have been overstretched with WFH and young children.
Most family is far too far away to pop along to the garden for a cup of coffee.

We're certainly not a geographically close and frequent family, but the conditions over the past 6 months and counting have made it impractical to meet in the windows where it has been permissable.

MarshaBradyo Sun 27-Sep-20 09:15:30

I feel geographically and logistically more distant as I can’t visit without paying for a quarantine hotel for two weeks, stuck in with dc, plus long haul not appealing.

ilovebagpuss Sun 27-Sep-20 09:17:33

Yes I’m struggling anyway as my mum died a couple of years ago so lots changed in the family dynamic. My DF who I see a lot for quick socially distanced visits will go to lunch at my brothers but not me due to risk levels (very fair and I’m glad he can go)
My in laws who live away would regularly come for a weekend but FIL is shielding and very vulnerable so that’s a no.
Feels like we have lost all our older relations in one go.
Of course there is phone and text but my DD’s are not great at texting their olds but love them and miss them in general life.
It’s all crap and making me very sad.

WhyAreThereNoNamesLeft Sun 27-Sep-20 09:25:25

No, my DM lives nearby. I’ve been more involved with her, as we’ve been doing her shopping, I FaceTimed her every day during full-on lockdown, and once things eased up a bit I’d go for a distanced walk with her. Because I’ve been WFH I’ve had more time for her. Despite not hugging at the moment I feel closer to her.

On the other hand one of my cousins has fallen down the conspiracy theory rabbit hole, and I don’t feel as if I can even ask how she is now as I find some of her views offensive.

I’m sorry your mum was so ill OP, that must have been very difficult.

SnuggyBuggy Sun 27-Sep-20 09:28:15

Yes, I hate being unable to make plans with people and virtual contact is a poor substitute for the real thing.

Ozgirl75 Sun 27-Sep-20 09:32:10

Well yes in some ways because I now haven’t seen them since December last year as I’m in Australia and they aren’t. On the other hand, I email almost daily and we talk so it isn’t too bad.

middleager Sun 27-Sep-20 09:36:17

Yes. My mother moved away just before Covid temporarily but then couldn't move back because of it.
I didn't see her for months.

Now she's moved back and the last two weeks local quarantine and my son in self isolation due to school means I've been unable to see her.

RedRec Sun 27-Sep-20 09:44:41

No, I feel closer to my teenage children (19 and 16) as we spent so much companionable time together over lockdown.
But then again I have a very small family (and no parents) so haven't been in the position where I have been unable to see close family. That would have been very different.

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