It’s infuriating!
I keep in regular contact with my family members.
My sister lives in a different country and consistently, year in year out texts me to ask for various family members’ addresses, birthdays, phone numbers etc. (Despite the fact I gave her an already filled in address book for Xmas)
My dad Does the same, expects me to remind him about everyone’s birthdays and doesn’t seem capable of putting them in his diary.
Sadly my grandmother died last week. Over the past 15 years I visited her a few times a year, write to her, ring her etc, I enjoyed a really loving relationship with her and feel satisfied that I got to know her well.
My sister (who has lived abroad for 15 years) didn’t have as much to do with our grandmother. She is angry with me for not telling her that there was a funeral this week and if she’d known, she’d have come along ie it’s my fault she’s not coming because I didn’t tell her.
It’s a quick 20 minute crematorium funeral without any speeches or even a wake and I’m travelling 200 miles up the country to attend, I didn’t even imagine that my sister would be interested in coming seeing as she has no money and hadn’t visited our grandmother since she was a child.
I’m sick of everyone including other family members asking how my sister is, asking what her plans are, whether she received their birthday gifts, why she doesn’t call them etc why can’t people communicate with each other? Why do I have to be the mouth piece for everyone?
I have utterly stepped back in recent years and just NEVER engage with any of them about each of the other because I can’t bear getting caught in the middle for example my sister gets angry if she feels out of the loop but takes zero responsibility or interest in being in the loop. Does this job land on my doorstep as the oldest sister through unconscious sexism?
My dad gives me all family photos, my sister’s got stuff stored at my house.
Sorry this is long.
Thanks for reading.
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Expected to be the matriarch of the family
18 replies
Callardandbowser · 30/07/2020 18:08
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