I am on maturity leave and due to go back to work in may. The thought of going back leaves me filled with anxiety and panicking. I am suffering with pnd and I think that is having an impact. I have spoken to my work place and they will not allow me to go part time. I am expected to return to work 8am -6pm Monday-Friday. I needed to use all my sick leave last year because of my pregnancy so the doctors suggestion of going sick and then having a phased return is making me think about it but I know my employer would not be happy. The only reason I didn't loose my job last time was I was protected by pregnancy. I also can't find a new job because if I leave I would need to pay back my maternity pay. Hubby says I should just take all my sick leave and then when I'm no longer entitled to it leave the job. I can't do that. The stress is so bad that I have lost massive amounts of hair and is affecting my eating. I have started getting more OCD type symptoms and can imagine trying to teach a class of 30 children when I have to check everything about 10 times just to leave the house to get a bottle of milk from the shop across the road. It took me 2 hours yesterday. I know they say once the mess start working this will be easier but I can't see how. I just don't know what to do.
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