Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 9 10

AIBU?

To report this childminder?

232 replies

Happyyellowcar · 26/02/2015 21:22

Was at playgroup today with DD and DS1. A local childminder was also there with several small children in tow. I see her around a lot as she goes to many of the same groups as I do. One of her charges was maybe a year old and obviously just toddling. During snack time I was standing behind DS2, holding DD whilst chatting to a friend when suddenly the little toddler who happened to be sitting next to DS1, toppled head first off her chair and onto the wooden floor. She landed on her head and her neck actually crunched. I hadn't even noticed she was there until she fell off as I was trying to stop DS2 from pinching all the breadsticks. Another mum picked up the now screaming toddler and looked around for the childminder who was sitting quite far from the table, chatting yo her friend. She was actually turned away from the table and on the far side from where this toddler was sitting. She was passed the toddler and have her a cuddle but I'm sure didn't realise how serious her fall had been. I feel really incensed on behalf of the toddler's mother who must think that her child is in safe hands whilst she is at work. I've used a childminder myself with DS2 and the thought that this might have happened to him is sickening. No mother would have left their own child on a chair at such a young age without keeping a closer eye, surely? How else is she being neglectful? AIBU to want to report her?

OP posts:

Report

Happyyellowcar · 26/02/2015 21:23

Was with DS2, not 1.

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 26/02/2015 21:26

How do you know the toddler didn't climb up on the chair herself and the CM didn't notice?

Also, if you were sure she didn't realise how serious the fall had been, why didn't you pop over, ask after the toddler and mention that you apparently heard her neck crunching?

Unless there are other reasons, I'm not sure this one alone is anything to report over. No-one has eyes in the back of their head.

kitchentableagain · 26/02/2015 21:29

Did you not tell her how serious the fall was!?

I'm not sure about reporting her. I'm a sahm and my kids fall sometimes. I mean kids fall. The worst ones usually happen when I'm right there but they've all fallen when I was not there for a moment or two as well. But someone should definitely have alerted her to how bad it seemed, otherwise how can she monitor for signs of a more serious injury? How can she let his mother know if she doesn't?

ChipDip · 26/02/2015 21:33

Did you go and inform her of exactly what happened. She could have been right next to the child and this still could have happened. Bit sneaky to want to complain about this if you didn't even tell her about the fall.

Smartiepants79 · 26/02/2015 21:34

Well it would depend a bit on why the childminder wasn't paying that close attention. I can see that kind of accident happening quite easily to anyone if they were distracted by the needs of another child for example. The accident on its own is not that unusual I would think and I wouldn't be overly concerned if the child was ok. Did you let the childminder know that you thought she had fallen badly?
However, if it's happened simply because she was having a chat then that's different and not great care. Unless I'd seen any other incidents of poor care I don't think I'd be saying anything though. Children fall all the time and I don't think I really class it as neglect. I'm not really sure that there is much you can do.

ZebraLovesKnitting · 26/02/2015 21:34

Why didn't you tell the CM how bad the fall was?! I wouldn't report this, I don't know why you would tbh.

YABU

Happyyellowcar · 26/02/2015 21:35

She is getting paid to look after other people's children, not to sit and chat. She ought to know where all of her charges are all of the time. Given that there are 3 tables set for snacks she should have been watching the tables at least. But she was actually turned away. I did go up to her at the end and ask if the toddler was ok. I asked if she realised she had fallen on her head and she said that she didn't know but she would "keep an eye on it". I wonder how she will explain it to the parents?

OP posts:

fizzycolagurlie · 26/02/2015 21:37

YANBU I think the child minder should have been doing exactly what her job is, minding not chatting with her back turned to the smallest child.

Unfortunately I see this all the time. Its a general attitude - they're playing so I can chat - well yes, fine if you also keep a bloody eye on them!

Happyyellowcar · 26/02/2015 21:42

I know kids fall all the time - DS1 once fell off his step and chipped his front tooth on the loo! I was standing right next to him putting toothpaste on his brush and couldn't have prevented it but the point is I was there and supervising him as best I could. She wasn't paying any attention at all.

OP posts:

kitchentableagain · 26/02/2015 21:42

Well childminders usually care for kids as they would their own. You can interpret that however you like.

Report her if you like OP (to whom?) but I suspect unless there is evidence of actual neglect you will be met with a big shrug. She probably told the mum "she took a tumble off a chair today at group, she seems okay, but just to let you know". It's different strokes for different folks but I don't follow my kids round all day to see if they happen to fall. I don't see the point of any potential childminder doing it either.

Miracularity · 26/02/2015 21:44

Report. If I were the mother of the child I would definitely expect more and I would not be happy to leave my child with that person ever again.

countessmarkyabitch · 26/02/2015 21:45

YABU for this line...

No mother would have left their own child on a chair at such a young age without keeping a closer eye, surely?

Happyyellowcar · 26/02/2015 21:54

Hmmm really? This child clearly wasn't old enough to sit unsupervised on a chair - she toppled off! If she been older I wouldn't be so bothered as yes accidents do happen but she did need to be supervised on that chair. Wouldn't most mums therefore supervise their kids in this situation?

OP posts:

FannyFifer · 26/02/2015 21:56

Child only fell of a chair, these things happen.

Happyyellowcar · 26/02/2015 22:00

I know children fall off chairs! I'm not upset just because the child fell but because the childminder was nowhere near the table, was turned away having a chat and not actually, well child-minding! And being paid to do this!

OP posts:

countessmarkyabitch · 26/02/2015 22:03

You've changed from no mum would ever do such a thing to most mums wouldn't, quite quickly. Give it another 10 minutes and you might get to the correct answer of you really don't know what any other mother would do and its not really any of your business.

Lepaskilf · 26/02/2015 22:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Happyyellowcar · 26/02/2015 22:07

So it's none of my business if I see a childminder being neglectful? I should just turn a blind eye then?

OP posts:

Happyyellowcar · 26/02/2015 22:10

Lepaskilf - as I said in my 1st post I was watching DS2 and holding DD who is 3months. So no I couldn't catch her. And as I said originally I didn't notice her until she fell as I was watching DS2. The childminder should have been watching this child, not me.

OP posts:

LuckyLopez · 26/02/2015 22:11

This isn't neglect.

If you truly knew what neglect was you wouldn't throw it out there for a fall from a chair.

She just didn't see her climb on a chair.

Not worthy of reporting and it would be spiteful to do so.

Mixtape · 26/02/2015 22:13

It doesn't sound like neglect to me - and I use a CM. I am also dubious about the child's neck audibly crunching.

Happyyellowcar · 26/02/2015 22:16

Wow! I'm really surprised most posters think it's ok. I must be over-reacting then..

OP posts:

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 26/02/2015 22:17

Hope the poor little one is okay. Made me shudder when you said about her neck crunching.

Iggly · 26/02/2015 22:18

I wouldn't think it was ok. She shouldn't be letting a one year old climb up on stuff - she should be paying attention. The kid is only little ffs.

Superworm · 26/02/2015 22:22

YANBU

I have a deep mistrust of childminders as I see a lot of crappy supervision and care. She should have been supervising properly, that's what's she is paid for.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 9 10

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.