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Online dating...... where have all the good men gone? Thread 110.

(1000 Posts)
Evilwater Sat 12-Nov-16 21:18:44

I know these threads have come in handy for many dipping their toes for the first time into OLD. So here we are again ... another 1000 posts down:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread.
11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will.
12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now)
13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good.
14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Myusernameismyusername Sat 12-Nov-16 21:21:03

grin I will stay with you all to follow the journeys!

Good luck tonight daters!

Evilwater Sat 12-Nov-16 21:22:02

So what do I tell the guy I dated saw last night? There wasn't any fire works, and he's a good guy, but I'm just not attracted to him physically.

Someone said about getting in contact with mr. No commitment, it's all in his corner. I sent him a card with how I felt, I've heard nothing. Rule 14.
God I miss him.

Myusernameismyusername Sat 12-Nov-16 21:25:12

Ok so the no chemistry guy

'Hi, lovely meeting with you, I had a nice time. I'm not sure there was the right chemistry between us to take this further but I wish you the best of luck in life! Take care'

Evilwater Sat 12-Nov-16 21:27:21

Thanks myuser

Evilwater Sat 12-Nov-16 21:28:59

God, I hate this.

Myusernameismyusername Sat 12-Nov-16 21:29:33

Bloody Mr NC. I want to give him a slap with a fish

pringlecat Sat 12-Nov-16 21:40:29

Rules 2, 3, 6 and 7. Still nothing from Mr Wildcard. Officially writing him off. Sigh. sad

Evilwater Sat 12-Nov-16 21:42:24

pringle flowers flowers

myuser I'd like to just talk to him, but rule 14.

Myusernameismyusername Sat 12-Nov-16 21:45:07

You need to put him in a little mental box close the lid and throw it at the bottom of the North Sea.

QueenLizIII Sat 12-Nov-16 21:49:54

I have a guy who's cropped up again after a second disappearance. Just messaged me out of the blue.

And another potential option now.

I might just stick to casual dating

Myusernameismyusername Sat 12-Nov-16 21:50:37

Not the doctor!!! Nooooo!

QueenLizIII Sat 12-Nov-16 21:53:05

oh yeah. the doctor. i havent dignified him with much of an answer. its funny. you want what you cant have.

but when he came back I was like confused and not grin

This time if I do see him ...I dont want him as anything serious either now. Just a random date.

QueenLizIII Sat 12-Nov-16 21:53:42

The other guy was nice too but dont want serious with him. Just a nice random potential is the newer guy too.

Myusernameismyusername Sat 12-Nov-16 21:55:21

I'm not a fan of the doctors behaviour I think it's just shitty and disrespectful. You can do way better

Myusernameismyusername Sat 12-Nov-16 21:58:06

I had a chat with Shy about my useless reaction to his nice messages and we have concluded we are both total twats because he was all nervous and thought his message was all clumsy and we laughed about it

QueenLizIII Sat 12-Nov-16 21:58:27

Nor am I a fan. I cant take him seriously now.

he asked me out last minute last week....lovely. a last minute again after not much chat at all.

I havent replied.

But I dont want serious from him either now.

BaklavaBalaclava Sun 13-Nov-16 01:12:11

Just waving at the shiny new thread...

Hope you had a nice time with your friend Pringle (waves rule 6 in your face a bit)

His loss, my dear

AintThatSomething Sun 13-Nov-16 07:31:36

Morning all!

Lilac good luck today smile
Queen It sounds like you are being sensible an in charge of this one now
Myuser I bet you feel better after the conversation, that is really sweet.

I was in messages last night with 3 OLD irons, and also with Mr RL shock 4 men- bloody hell.

Can I ask advice though, 2 of the OLD men I quite like, have messaged them both loads over last couple days. Think they are genuine confused.

I am new to this so not sure how to go about the meeting up bit. Can I suggest, or wait for them? Don't want to end up as pen pals and have some free time next week/weekend that I would like to fill....

pringlecat Sun 13-Nov-16 07:47:17

I've only met two men so far and I'm starting to lose faith in OLD! Given the lack of second dates, I'm starting to assume I must be an ugly heffalump, which isn't great for my self-confidence. I am re-reading the thread rules, but it's hard to bounce back.

I'm half-wondering if I should try another website and delete myself from this one. Would be just my luck if the same men appeared on both.

pringlecat Sun 13-Nov-16 07:50:43

AintThatSomething 4 men, aren't you popular! Go you! smile I think if you've already messaged a lot and they haven't suggested meeting up yet, you should take the initiative because I think you can talk for too long and that can make the initial meeting worse.

AintThatSomething Sun 13-Nov-16 07:57:49

Thanks Pringle, I may take the initiative later grin

What site are you on? These are all POF. I am on match too but POF seems to be better in my area. Seems to be mainly older blokes on match that are into me confused

pringlecat Sun 13-Nov-16 08:16:15

AintThatSomething Also on POF and also had 2 really nice genuine sounding guys... One of yours isn't a doctor, is he? wink

I'm thinking about Coffee meet Bagel next, although the damn thing requires a FB account, so I may have to set up a dummy account just to try it out.

BaklavaBalaclava Sun 13-Nov-16 09:02:50

Have date no 3 today. I really enjoy his company/texts and he is not repulsive to me. I get the impression that he is scared of upsetting me, so if we are going to try kissing today I think I'll have to initiate! (he has tried to hint at fancying me in a couple of texts, but on both occasions I was distracted by the kids, and by the time I'd picked them up he'd sent panicked texts changing the subject, is very sweet)

Coffee meets bagel looks interesting. Let us know what its like! Why the fake fb profile? It doesn't post on fb or give your profile to others, does it?

pringlecat Sun 13-Nov-16 09:13:41

BaklavaBalaclava I've been stalked IRL before so I'm really paranoid about giving out too many personal details to strangers... Hope date 3 goes well and you have fun kissing him. wink

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