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NoCapes thread 2 - No cape necessary

(484 Posts)
NoCapes Sun 18-Sep-16 13:17:26

Can't believe we've filled up a whole thread
But I'm still not ready to be without you all yet ...

Funko Sun 18-Sep-16 13:20:44

Gah I posted on the old one!!
Still... Hurrah for nocapes star

notapizzaeater Sun 18-Sep-16 13:21:28

We will be hear as long as you need us xx

AyeAmarok Sun 18-Sep-16 13:21:42

You have a Wonderwoman Cape smile

NoCapes Sun 18-Sep-16 13:21:46

aye I don't feel like I'm doing that well, it all still feels...temporary tbh
I know I won't be able to just never speak to him about us again, I know I won't, and I know I'll get drunk and text him at least once
I'm just trying to hold off as long as possible so there's less chance of it even mattering - if that makes any sense at all confused

ayeokthen Sun 18-Sep-16 13:21:56

Hello again!

skyyequake Sun 18-Sep-16 13:22:41

shamelessly placemarking so this is in my I'm On list grin

Also GO NOCAPES [unattractive pom pom dance]

NoCapes Sun 18-Sep-16 13:23:01

That was in answer to a post way up the last thread - my thumbs are slow today blush

ayeokthen Sun 18-Sep-16 13:23:26

You'll get there NoCapes honestly you will, it's normal for it to feel temporary. It's a massive change, and he's hurt you very badly over a long period of time. Any time you feel you're wobbling or struggling we're all here! Xxx

GlitteryFluff Sun 18-Sep-16 13:23:59

You handled the handover great. Well done.
You've got this. You're doing amazingly.

Iamdobby63 Sun 18-Sep-16 13:24:04

If you were to drunk text him he might probably agree with everything you say just to get back in. You have to keep reminding yourself of the reality of living with him.

You are bound to have ups and downs.

GiddyOnZackHunt Sun 18-Sep-16 13:25:39

grin Happy placemark

Lynnm63 Sun 18-Sep-16 13:25:40

Hi nocapes love what you've done with the place looks around approvingly you are awesome if I were a man I'd marry you! You made if through the first handover the rest can surely only get easier.

CousinCharlotte Sun 18-Sep-16 13:25:41

It's a bumpy road, but you'll get there brew

NoCapes Sun 18-Sep-16 13:27:00

I agree dobby and I do keep reminding myself already
It's not just me that I'm stopping him ignoring/snapping at/shouting and swearing at - it's the kids too and I can't keep doing this to and fro for their sake
I'm already noticing a change in the way they're speaking to me and to each other, without having such a bad influence around
Noticing the changes is keeping me going

tiredvommachine Sun 18-Sep-16 13:27:07

You have the advantage of two threads (and the rest) full of his fuckwittery to be able to refer back to when nostalgia/wine makes you think wistfully of the relationship you thought you had.
The bloke is an arse.

skyyequake Sun 18-Sep-16 13:27:22

You know, I lost my DGM back in June... It still feels "temporary" to me, like it's not real. You're going through the grieving process, it's tough but unfortunately your relationship is dead, he killed it. Eventually you will reach the acceptance stage, but you will obviously ride the emotional rollercoaster before you get there.

flowers wine chocolate

NoCapes Sun 18-Sep-16 13:27:24

Lynn grin

GabsAlot Sun 18-Sep-16 13:28:13

hi nocapes and everyone

lovely new thread!

we're all here still no worries x

GabsAlot Sun 18-Sep-16 13:29:01

sorry i cocked up last message on your old thread lots of typos

PurpleThursday Sun 18-Sep-16 13:29:26

Checking back in. New tread new life. You recognise the behaviour patterns nocapes, you might slip a little but you are on the right path now!

It will feel temporary - until it doesn't. One step at a time. Eventually you will start to look forward, not back. Before every decision think 'what would Mumsnet say' smile

There will be hard moments, and yes - you may text him. But remember next morning, in the cold light of day, you have every right to change your mind. At that point you just text him again and say 'I was not in my right frame of mind last night, please ignore'

ayeokthen Sun 18-Sep-16 13:32:51

Noticing the changes, and documenting them, either on here on on paper at home, will give you something to hold on to when you're struggling. Your kids sound amazing, properly lovely little people, and I'm sure they're proud of their Mum too xxx

Afreshstartplease Sun 18-Sep-16 13:34:09

Well done on the handover nocapes!

tiredvommachine Sun 18-Sep-16 13:35:07

Gabs did you type that last message on the old thread with your face? wink

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