I don't know where to begin but I'll start with a small 'conversation' last night,
DH- what's wrong
ME- stressed
DH- why are you so stressed
ME- not sure think it's because I have three small children (5yr, 21month, 3month) I do the same thing day in and day out even in the weekends
DH- change that then
ME- ok, I'll take one evening of the week to do something
DH- yea there's loads you can do with the kids...
ME- I mean by myself
DH- .......(silence)
DH went to put his shoes away so I said alright I'm gonna pop down BF for a coffee, bottles are already made, baby still asleep...
DH then said 'well I'm going to work' I said' but you just put your shoes away' he said 'yea, because I was going to get a shirt'??? Makes zero sen e but if I say anything he'll just make out in being weird and difficult.
Because I suffer with depression, he will always say that when I'm annoyed and upset with him or kids (very rare to I feel stressed either children but have done last few days as they have been ill) he has the excuse to say that it's my depression playing up. I never know if it is my mental health or its him?
I have been with him since school so I really don't know any different, I have nothing to compare our relationship to but I feel totally lost and crazy!
How much time do you spend on your me time if you have young children just so I know I'm not being unreasonable to ask?
I am a SAHM by choice, I worked and qualified in my trade with my 1st child and choose to take time off with my 2nd and 3rd, I have no money. I have to ask for money which I hate doing, we have a joint account and I have my own, if I have any money in there I leave it because he will take it sometimes and say it's for bills, I really don't know otherwise.
I used to deal with all the money but since the breakdown 3 years ago I've taken a step back, I feel like a child. I am a shell of who I used to be.
I went out to a festival recently, DH very unsociable so didn't go, he silently looks down on me for drinking and socialising so I don't go anywhere anymore, even if I'm watching something like Geordie shore, he'll come in a snicker saying look how stupid all these people are
... It's really hard to explain all this so please bare with me and try to understand
I do every night shift, he has never had all three children by him self so how can he even question why I could have been stressed yesterday?
He says that all these years I can't just be happy with what I've got and I am, but I have three children and we live with my parents because he's work is so unpredictable (self employed) few years ago he racked up lots of debts, this was when I had the breakdown and I was pregnant.
At the same time I had to spend 3 weeks on a mental health unit because my depression was so bad, he came to visit me once! I was heavily pregnant, the once time he did come to see me he had a fresh new hair cut and clean clothes a
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Relationships
How much 'me time' does your partner allow you to yourself to keep you sane?
Candlefairy101 · 08/06/2016 11:05
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