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Mumsnet's ten-point list of recommendations to improve miscarriage care here has been featured in The Times, together with Mumsnetters' experiences. Thanks to everyone who contributed to drawing up our code of practice. If you need support or advice about miscarriage, please post here. MiscarriageStandardCodeofPractice

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penguinmum's creamy fish pie: smoky, seasonal fish in a creamy white sauce with grated, rather than mashed, tatties on top - a meal of the highest comfort-food order.

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Emmsys angels xxx support for mummies of lost angels part 4 xxxxx

(771 Posts)
Less sadness, more joy but always lots of lovely people who understand
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Thu 27-Aug-09 23:05:37
It's still so quiet here! Giggle - great to hear from you and your coping strategies. My LO was due on Tuesday and my coping strategy is being out of the country with work. We might have to do something this weekend as I feel the need to mark it in someway.
MummyofAdela - so sorry to hear that you are back again. Having said that, you did well to concieve again so quickly - if you can convince your partner, 3rd time lucky?
I'm just about to hit 40 and no sign of another pregnancy so this may be it for us but then two dc's keep me busy enough!!
hi, just wandering through to catch up, I sort of feel the need...
lo's due date was last week, I got through it by going to an interview and getting a new job hmm I just think I want to make everything change and start a new chapter of my life iyswim.
Hugs to all of you who are in a rubbish place at the moment, and wishing you lots of luck with whatever you want to do next.
I've noticed it has been quiet in here too, I hope you are all ok.
mumofadela selfishness is a right of passage on here, we have all been there, and I am so so sorry it is happening again to you. When I suffered my 2nd mc I just couldn't believe my bad luck.

To all you other ladies that have been on here, when you feel ready there is an 'emmsys onwards and upwards' thread on the conception board. We all started off on here, so come join us whenever you feel ready.

<<Vjay waves to cupcake and mermaid>>
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 01-Aug-09 11:45:43
just cleaning away the cobwebs, ah thats better, loads of cake crumbs and empty packets of mini eggs behind the sofa tut tutgrin

mumofAdela honey this place is a great place to be selfish in honey.
So sorry you are back here, I think I remember you back in January too.
You have a horrid weekend ahead of you, why is it always weekends? Thinking of you.

In our hearts I think we know the answer to that question 'is it time to stop' but I am not brave enough to say it out loud even in a whisper cos then I will make it reality.

Only we can know how lucky we are to have our dc, it does not take away the loss of our los. I am trying really hard to enjoy what I am so blessed to have and not linger too long in the bad lands of the last 4 years.
Wishing you strength through the next days and weeks.x
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 31-Jul-09 23:26:45
Sorry, I've not read all the threads, so I'm being selfish and just posting about me.
I did write here end of Jan after a MC and had fantstic suport. I was lucky enough to conceive again but am now in the beginning of another MC at 8 weeks

Yesterday I had blood when I wiped, went to Dr this morning and have a scan booked Monday. Meanwhile cramps have set in and a few clots etc. Feeling so gutted, second MC in 6 months. I am 45 so guess I'm lucky to have conceived anyway. I think this is it now. Anyone had a similar experience, at my age, and gone on to have a baby, or should i just stop. My partner wants to stop trying as he doesn't want me to go through this pain anymore.

I am so lucky to have my 9 year old daughter anyway. Should I just stop this now and get on with things?
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Tue 28-Jul-09 09:25:17
I still keep an eye on it as well. x
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 25-Jul-09 18:51:20
Can't believe it's been a month since this thread was active

Just wanted people to know that a few of the Emmsys Onwards & Upwards girls still keep their eye on this thread so if anybody needs a hand to hold or anything, give us a shout
Ackyboo

So sorry that you are going through this as well, it really sucks doesnt it. Im a SAHM so I dont have to think about going back to work. I do a bit of admin stuff for DH's business but nothing that requires any hard work. You should take as much time as you need before you return, as you say its not even been a week yet, we need time to sort our heads out.Do you have a sympathetic GP? Hopefully they will give you as much time as you need with a sicknote.

I just had a lovely chat with my friend and she helped me see that all the things I thought at the time were perfectly normal, things like hoping they had got it wrong sadShe said just take each day one at a time, we will find it hard but will get through it. Hope that doesnt soung glib, I know some of the things people say are well meaning but come across a bit crass, it is hard to get what you want to say out without it sounding like a cliche.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Thu 25-Jun-09 12:55:26
Hello everyone. I'm new to mumset, so please fogive me for just jumping in on your thread.
undertheduvet - I feel exactly the same as you. I too had a m/c at the weekend and we are completely gutted. I had no problem with DS who is 6, but since then conceiving has been a living nightmare! I've had 6 failed attempts at Clomid and when I finally gave up any hope (other than IVF) I got caught in 07 only to have a mmc at 10 weeks. We decided to give up completely and low and behold I got caught again in April 09! This is the one that I lost at the weekend. I feel so sad and empty. At 35, difficulty conceiving, 2 m/c behind me I really don't think I will ever have my much longed for 2nd baby.
I'm seeing my GP on Monday to beg for a referral to investigate why, but I'm not hopeful as I believe the norm is 3 m/c.
Sorry for rambling everyone, but I just feel like you all understand.

undertheduvet - do you work? If so how soon are you planning to return? I get the impression that people think that once the physical side of the m/c has happened I should be back. I really don't feel ready or strong enough emotionally yet.
ChoChoSan, littlebellsmum , neeko Thanks for your kind words.
Sorry not been back here before now, havent really had the chance to get back online.
I ended up miscarrying naturally on sunday, so the first tablet must have helped it along. I didnt have much pain apart from a few cramps, so for that I am thankfull. Went back to EPU on monday were they scanned to confirm it was all over, so no need for any more intervention.
I have a DS who is 3.7 but he was staying with my parents for a few days so me and DH could just be with each other.
We have both been sad, weepy and tired but luckily have been able to talk to each other and work through it together. He has been a total rock for me over the last week and it has really made me appreciate how lucky I am to have such a wonderful husband.
Today is his first day back at work so I hope he is coping ok. His boss and wife have been through this so at least he will be understanding and know that DH has lsot a baby too not just me. He is having some problems dealing with my parents in that they dont seem to be acknowledging his loss too, just always asking about me. I think that at some point I will have to broach this with them, as I dont need to deal with any bad feeling between people on top of all this
I am going to take my DS to one of his groups this afternoon, so hopefully I'll be ok. My friend will be there so will have some support, she has been a star as well, having tragically gone through this herself twice.
Physically I feel ok, a bit tired but nothing else, Emotionally Im not sure how I am, I suppose that taking it one day at a time is the best plan, today I feel OK so Im going to focus on that.

Thanks for letting me ramble on again, letting things out like this is a good vent. I've been on mumsnet since 2006 but have mainly lurked, only posting occasionally but only now I am realising how helpful it can be.
This is page 1 of 78 (This thread has 771 messages.) First | Previous | Next | Last Go to page
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