To ask how many feel they’ve “settled” and who feels there’re with their “soul mate”

[butterflytree7]

I think I may have settled. So I’m just curious about who feels they’ve settled in a relationship and who actually feels they are with their soul mate?

[SomeoneElseEntirelyNow]

Absolutely with my soulmate. More and more certain of this as i see so many posts from women on here complaining that their OHs treat them like shit and do the bare minimum. I think it must be a generational thing, i had no idea my husband was unusual in doing his fair share of housework and childcare.

[DateandTime]

I think I settled for my soulmate which gave me a fairly boring life. I knew that though and at the time wanted to avoid the excitement a more turbulent relationship might have brought. Most of the time I think I got it right....

[Tramolamodol]

I don't believe in soul mates but I certainly haven't settled. We've been together 15 years and I wouldn't change him for anything.

[Ihaveoflate]

Soulmate. I feel incredibly lucky.

[Cheeeeesecaaaaakkkeeee]

Don’t believe in romantic soul mates really. I believe you have several people, family and friends included that were supposed to be in your life. Different people to teach you different things. I’ve been in love twice. First husband we split and then he died shortly after. Second I’m still married to. I would say they were both soul mates in some form I suppose. I also have friends that I believe are soul mates. But as I said I believe it in terms of people you were supposed to have in your life in some form or another. Definitely don’t think there is just one person out there who is supposedly perfect for you.

[Puds11]

Definitely soul mate. I couldn’t bare anyone else. Just hope I don’t stuff it up!

[SporadicNamechange]

I’m not convinced by any ‘soul mate’ talk.

However, I have most certainly not settled. DH is completely amazing and just about as perfect for me (rather than actually perfect - he’s got plenty of faults, but I can live with them) as anyone is likely to get. So I’ll stick with him.

[isabellerossignol]

I don't feel I settled, not by a long way.

But I also don't believe in soul mates. That's why people who are happily married but unfortunately are widowed can go on to be happily married a second time. There is more than one person out there who might make us happy.

[AndMyHairWillShineLikeTheSea]

I don't believe I soul mates. I think these kind of fairy tale beliefs can cause people to be unhappy.

I haven't 'settled' though, I love DH.

[Boredofbeingathome]

My soul mate died, I've settled ever since

[ThatsBullshirt]

I've been with my husband since I was sixteen, almost fifteen years ago, and I definitely don't think I settled. I can't imagine being with anyone else who makes me feel so happy and loved. He drives me up the wall sometimes but I am very lucky.

[GeraltOfRivia]

Neither. I haven't settled for my husband. I love him hugely and we are an amazing partnership. I'm very happy. But nor do I believe in the romantic notion of soulmates.

[minipie]

What Sporadic and a couple of others said.

I don’t believe in soul mates, the one, etc.

In fact tbh I think that kind of language just encourages people to feel unhappy with their life, because they think they’re missing out on some dramatic romance.

I didn’t settle for DH though, he’s great in pretty much every way and I think the chances of there being someone better out there are close to nil.

[minettechatouette]

Soulmate. I mean, I don't actually believe in souls. But my husband is both objectively the best and also the best suited to me of anyone I've ever met.

[lazylinguist]

^ What Geralt said .

[GeraltOfRivia]

@lazylinguist oh valley of plenty

[PrincessHoneysuckle]

I settled with my 1st marriage age 24-32 he was the first person to come along that treat me right.Im now with dh who I love more than life itself.

[VodkaCranberry2]

I guess in answer to your question soulmates, but I’m not sure I believe in that, I used to but me and my partner are SO different and I always believed soulmates are basically each other. But have I found the person I love and who I see spending the rest of my life with? Yes, and I don’t believe I have settled. We get on so well, we have never had an argument, I am the most open with him I have ever been with anyone, he is so supportive and understanding and rational, I have severe OCD (mainly intrusive POCD thoughts) and he’s the only person I’ve ever opened up to about it, I don’t even talk to my therapist about it! He is the best dad in the world and my best friend.

[Greenkit]

I settled for 29 yrs

Now with my soul mate, nearly a year x

[dustybluebell]

I've settled, but then so has he. We get on ok, but we dont 'get' each other and that's one of the things I find sad. We have similar humour tastes and political views, but that's about it.

[ScrimpshawTheSecond]

Don't believe in souls, let alone soul mates.

Happily partnered, though.

[MsTSwift]

I don’t believe in soul mates but I chose my husband very carefully and thankfully I chose well! (Touch wood!)

[EuphegeniaDoubtfire]

My husband settled for me.

[EdersonsSmileyTattoo]

100% married to my soulmate, he says the same.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

I married my first Dh when I believed in that twaddle = dreadful marriage.

My second is wonderful, I love him, he's perfect (for me) and I didn't settle. Much better.