DH has asked me not to fart in bed!

(223 Posts)
krisskross Wed 26-Jan-11 21:35:08

just bought a new bed, he thinks we will sully it with farts! i think he is being stupid and i cannot stop what has to come out.

we agreed to let MN decide.

BluddyMoFo Wed 26-Jan-11 21:36:28

Would he be ok with you sticking your arse out of the sheets and farting that way...its all about compromise.

pranma Wed 26-Jan-11 21:37:28

you cant help farting sometimes and I bet he doesnt leap out of bed every time he er 'gets the wind up'

Mymblesson Wed 26-Jan-11 21:37:52

I think he should give you the Dutch Oven.

That'll learn you.

FabbyChic Wed 26-Jan-11 21:37:59

I don't believe partners should fart in front of each other, shows a total lack of disrespect and the old adage familiarity breeds contempt comes to mind.

It is not in the least sexy to fart in bed at all.

peggotty Wed 26-Jan-11 21:38:01

lol!!!! Are you generally a couple prone to farting in bed then?

Dylthan Wed 26-Jan-11 21:38:32

As long as you don't waft the sheets then I feel he has nothing to complain about.

wonderstuff Wed 26-Jan-11 21:38:38

I couldn't cope with that. YANBU.

ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo Wed 26-Jan-11 21:39:05

you can't hold what is not in your hand wink

as my old dad would say.

how does he expect you to hold farts in when you are sleeping?

VeeBee3 Wed 26-Jan-11 21:39:08

YANBU .... however I can thinks of more pleasant ways to christen a new bed! wink

Mymblesson Wed 26-Jan-11 21:39:32

I don't believe partners should fart in front of each other, shows a total lack of disrespect and the old adage familiarity breeds contempt comes to mind.

Spot on.

krisskross Wed 26-Jan-11 21:39:51

Dutch Oven? whats that????

ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo Wed 26-Jan-11 21:40:23

"It is not in the least sexy to fart in bed at all."

are we only to be sexy in bed? cant we just be... ourselves? confused

faverolles Wed 26-Jan-11 21:40:36

Fabbychic, if DH and I didn't indulge in the odd trump, we would both explode.
Fart gas kills bedbugs, so you would be preventing future infestations.
(I made that bit up btw, but your DH might be the gullible sort)

Mymblesson Wed 26-Jan-11 21:40:38

http://onlineslangdictionary.com/definition+of/dut ch+oven

Ingles2 Wed 26-Jan-11 21:41:03

so how you going to control that when you're asleep eh?

ILoveItWhenYouCallMeBoo Wed 26-Jan-11 21:41:09

dutch oven: one person farts under the sheets then grabs otehr persons head and holds it under the sheets making them breathe in the fart. not pleasant.

BluddyMoFo Wed 26-Jan-11 21:41:21

If you hold your bumcheeks apart they come out silently anyway so you can carry on and he'll never know.

Unless its a stinker obviously.

Mymblesson Wed 26-Jan-11 21:41:28

In particular:

http://www.asylum.com/2009/10/20/a-womans-perspect ive-on-dutch-ovens/

pascoe28 Wed 26-Jan-11 21:42:57

Some classy ladies on here...

Lovetheskinurine Wed 26-Jan-11 21:43:38

Pack him in. YANBU.

imustbemadasaboxoffrogs Wed 26-Jan-11 21:43:39

Can I just say only on MN

This sort of talk would not be tolerated on other forums

grin

Lovetheskinurine Wed 26-Jan-11 21:44:35

And can I add, 'parp' grin

Mymblesson Wed 26-Jan-11 21:44:35

Oh I think GUT would cope ;-)

QueenLaQueefer Wed 26-Jan-11 21:45:16

What about fanny farts?

Are they allowed?

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