Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Would you stay with your partner if they decided to transition?

775 replies

RedRobyn2021 · 08/01/2022 21:06

I'm watching an episode of Queer Eye where this transwoman's partner said they stayed with them after they decided they wanted to transition and it got me thinking

If your partner decided they wanted to transition would you stay with them?

OP posts:
HeyGirlHeyBoy · 08/01/2022 21:07

No way.

RedCandyApple · 08/01/2022 21:07

No

Eileen101 · 08/01/2022 21:07

No. There's a fundamental change to the relationship right there.

Greenmarmalade · 08/01/2022 21:07

Fuck no

mistermagpie · 08/01/2022 21:08

I don't think I could. I would still love him, but I don't think I would be attracted to him or want a sexual relationship with him anymore.

LizzieSiddal · 08/01/2022 21:08

Most definitely not.

They wouldn’t be the person I thought they had been for 31 years. Our whole marriage would feel like a lie and I’d never forgive them for that.

colouringindoors · 08/01/2022 21:08

No. Way.

iloverunningslow · 08/01/2022 21:08

No. He wouldn't be the same person I thought he was. I hope we'd still be friends though.

pompomsgalore · 08/01/2022 21:08

Fuck no

SnugKnights · 08/01/2022 21:08

Definitely not although I’m sure we could stay friends.

AfterSchoolWorry · 08/01/2022 21:09

No.

tricksyt · 08/01/2022 21:09

No.

Joolsin · 08/01/2022 21:10

Absolutely not. Would not be able for that level of gaslighting.

twomumsonebump · 08/01/2022 21:10

Without a doubt. She's more to me than just her genitals. I love her heart and soul, and if it came down to losing her or letting her be her true self then I wouldn't even question it.

CrossStichQueen · 08/01/2022 21:10

I couldn't.
For my husband to declare he is and always was a woman would make a mockery of our marriage plus I am not attracted to males who present as women.

Stellaris22 · 08/01/2022 21:10

Yes. It would be an incredibly lengthy discussion to understand why they felt that way, but I don't think I could just stop loving my partner.

gamerchick · 08/01/2022 21:10

No.

FHmama · 08/01/2022 21:10

No

CinnabarRed · 08/01/2022 21:11

Yes

Noonoo8589 · 08/01/2022 21:11

Absolutely no

elgreco · 08/01/2022 21:11

No.

travellingturtle · 08/01/2022 21:12

No. I'm straight.

Doesn't mean that I wouldn't still love them or that I'd cast them out of my life, but I don't want to be in a relationship with a woman.

Redwinestillfine · 08/01/2022 21:12

Absolute deal-breaker

LaVidaJoker · 08/01/2022 21:12

Not a chance

PurplePikachu · 08/01/2022 21:13

Nope.
And yes of course he’s more than just his genitalia ffs.

But if he wanted to present as a woman, that would not be attractive to me, and if he wanted to identify as a woman and intrude on women’s spaces that would be so fundamental a difference of beliefs that we would no longer be compatible.