You cannot communicate with batshit

[Pingpang]

Following on from a recent thread regarding those who are NC/LC with family members.

Welcome to the good ship Narcymcnarcface! The bar is stocked and there's a seat for everyone. Shuffleboard starts in 20 mins.

We need YCCWB wristbands.

Hello new thread!

So, as I was saying on the old thread, anyone seen The Bridge? Saga & her mother!! (mainly the way her mother reduced a successful capable women to a bag of nerves, more so than the plot - but that too!)

😂

What time is dinner with the Captain?

Hi all!

Did someone mention food?

Present! Thanks for setting a new thread up.

I need to catch up on the last bit of the old thread, but marking here for now.

:)

We need YCCWB wristbands.

Totally agree. :o

Stepping on board. Left a post on the previous thread as well, as I appeared to have been a touch insensitive.

and to all aboard. :)

I know I should just add to my Watch list, but never check it

I like this ship! A cruise is just what I need.

Hello!

Perhaps I'll be able to serve, in the next few weeks, as an object lesson in why you shouldn't try to communicate with the batshit. I'm hoping it might be quick and painless, probably quick and painful - however I do live a long long way away so that helps.

*screenshot " I think we'll make The Bridge our next DVD binge watch.

Morning! Just a couple of housekeeping things- please take note of your nearest muster station as there will be a drill later on this morning. Also, flying monkeys have been reported on the starboard side.

Wristbands distributed at the midday buffet.

Screen, haven't seen that yet. I have so many things taped that I need to get watching them first before I commit to something new.

Mummyto2, you can nominate yourself to sit beside the captain if you're feeling particularly low.

Baconyum, there are a number of dining options on board, let me know if you have any particular dietary requirements.

I'm going to nominate the many forms of Garlic for a special first days sailing prize, mainly for demonstrating in real time on the other threads on the other site the title of this one. Batshit doesn't begin to describe it.

In case I don't mention it, I have read everyone else's posts and it has been both shocking and reassuring to see how many others are, so to speak, in the same boat .

I didn't put a lot on the last thread but hoping to add a bit more to this one.

Sending you all a breakfast buffet

Sgoinneal, I found the batshit levels ramped up before, during and after the births of my DCs. I think it's because they realise they will have less of your attention so have to act up even more to get noticed.

A delightful level of batshit (my "d"m) decided the other day to nag mutual family to get me to allow her contact with dc. But she wanted contact without me, when they were elsewhere.... She's married to a convicted paedophile (she kicked me out for him). Yup... She thinks that's ok. I said no and still maintaining my nc, three years and counting.

I know what you mean sgoinneal, can't argue with batshit but sometimes you can't help but wonder.....

Pingpang re the batshit getting worse when one's children are born - yes to that, looking after the kids took me away from my constant efforts to keep her on an even keel (see what I did there). She needs her reality managed for her on an hour to hour basis.

Hah! I've been told I need to "get a move on" as she wants to "live to meet her grandchildren".

Now, that's a perfectly normal sentiment - except that every summer, holiday, Christmas, birthday, occasion since I was about fifteen maybe, we've been guilt-tripped (and now I get it from sibling too) by endless "this may be our last xxxx together, you know, mum's not very well. Be nice." Almost 20 years of this shit.

In fairness, she was kind about the MCs, to the point I almost cried. Right until she started using them to get sympathy for herself.

Now that they know we're trying, I've also been told to be nice to her as she's "my main childcare you know" Like fuck. I'd rather die of exhaustion.

Snort Narcy McNarcface!

Ps I seem to have a lot of batshit - real and in law. How lucky and I?

Blushing I think AC of batshit parents do tend to find each other... DH's family are less extreme than mine but similar, and I think we were attracted to one another's plain talking and stuff.

Mil falls into Narcy McNarcface territory. She saw our children once at a family event; ds was four months and dd 2 and half. They are now 21 and 23. She felt compelled to tell me that "I had broken up her little family and she would never acknowledge her gc". The little family was my dh, her and her daughter. Coming from a damaged, but loving family I was rather flommoxed by her little tirade and just stood up and moved away. The last time dh saw her was about 6 years ago, at her request. When he arrived she spent ten minutes screaming at him; he won't see her again (his choice). NC is weird, heartbreaking and confusing to start with, but persevere. It will save your children from much confusion in the long run. Be honest with them in an age appropriate manner and don't feel guilty. Being a parent is a priviledge not a right and that applies to grandparents and aunts and uncles alike.

You cannot communicate with batshit is exactly why we went nc with Sil. I was trying to reason with her and got loads of rants, at that point I decided that it was pointless...

Very interesting, whoever put the link to "covert narcissism", a cousin of Dp's is this exactly, very sullen, spoilt, entitled and if you say anything you get lots of emails of vitriol and false accusations. We are nc with cousin too, after they tried to send "fake" emails from dp. No great loss.

I know what people mean about parents not letting children grow up. When mil treats dp badly we get "But you're my son", a pity she doesn't behave like a proper mother. It's definitely a control thing. Dp works from home but mil doesn't see it as a proper job, she doesn't recognise it. Apparently, mil is keeping dp and us, with a gift of money she gave to all her children . We are lc with her, but she does live near but we keep most things on a superficial level. We are honest with Dd1, and she is quite perceptive and accepts that granny is a bit "nuts", though she is generally pretty well-behaved to dcs.

T

Pipe me aboard!
I'm LC with my own family due to various issues, and I'm ok with the present situation, they don't bother me though. I think they think they'll just wait me out, which is fine with me.

Will be interested to see any coping mechanisms for actual batshit MILs though. DH has a totally batshit mother that you can't even have a conversation with about ANYTHING.
Prone to excessive spending, unfair division of time, money gifts, etc between siblings. DH is the eldest, BIL is the youngest, golden child. DH is the 'stupid boy', it makes me cringe when she calls him a bastard on the phone when he's disagreed with her about something, not even arguing, he's just expressing an opinion. She likes to keep all children dangling and dancing to her tune with promises of money, total batshit drama queen.