AIBU to not buy adults drinks at softplay party?

[GraceNotes]

I just gave my DD a softplay party for her 5th birthday. I asked my sister about what's expected in terms of providing food and drink for the adults, as she has been to loads of SP parties and I haven't.
She told me that the drinks and food are never provided - there is always a cafe where the parents can go and purchase one. Obvs the children had party food, etc. However, she lives in a different part of the country.

So, I did not provide adult refreshments. Most of the adults just went up to get their own. However, I felt a few were a bit off about having to purchase them . One Mum announced loudly to her child that she couldn't come and play because she was waiting for coffee, then finally went up to buy one, but stared at me glumly the whole time she was in the queue. I also got a dirty look off another parent, who had been sat waiting for a while, as he went over to the counter.

When I arrived at the venue, they asked me if I would like to set up a tab for the parents drinks and I said no. The hot drinks are £2.20 each and as some children came with both parents it would have cost me £30-£40 just to buy them drinks. The party has cost us around £200 all-in and I really did not want to add on that amount of extra cost. There was food leftover from the kids' buffet which was put aside for the adults. (Party was 3pm to 5pm so not over tea-time).

I'm new to this area and I'm now worried that the expectations here are different and not providing drinks may be frowned upon. This is a very affluent area (we are the exception - we live on a normal estate with smaller houses, but surrounded by bigger ones). When my DD unwrapped the presents afterwards I'm surprised at how generous they were. What do you think the expectations are in this situation?

[veryveryVERYdarkblue]

Never buy them drinks etc. They are at party to supervise/morally support their kids. I am not holding a party for them. If they help me out, great - I'll help them when it's their turn. We have a natter and a bit of a bond but they buy their own drinks.

[TyneTeas]

It's not something I have seen provided at soft play parties

[JosephineMaynard]

The norm at soft play parties I've been to is for parents to buy their own refreshments.
There's only been one party I've been to where the hosts paid for parents drinks, and that was only for the first hot drink per accompanying parent.

[Daytona79]

I recently held my 2 year olds at soft play I never provided anything for adults and I've been to a few parties at them and again nothing been provided for adults.

[RaeSkywalker]

YANBU. I'd never expect hot drinks to be provided for adults.

[SheldonCRules]

We've always provided drinks and cake whilst the children were young enough to need parents to stay. It's polite and good hosting.

[Aeroflotgirl]

No that is not the done thing, cheeky tight feckers. I never expect drinks when I take dd to parties, I buy my own, and so do most parents I know. They are not going to melt not having a drink. Very rude imho!

[Etak15]

Don't worry about it, Soft play area party's parents always buy their own drinks - this is how is is at the ones I've been to - also if you take other siblings you pay for them too and anything they eat/drink
With the exception of one of dd2's friends parents who always open up a tab for parents drinks wherever the venue - but that is defo an exception!

[bumsexatthebingo]

It might be that getting parents drinks is the norm in your area. Where I am some parties have provided hot drinks and/or some nibbles for parents and some haven't. I tend to get a couple of large pizzas from the cafe and a few bowls of chips and let them pick at the kids leftovers. Probably works out cheaper than a couple of coffees each. I don't think adults should expect to be catered for at a kids party though. Especially when it's not even over a mealtime.

[Mummyme1987]

No drinks for adults here either.

[Lazybeans50]

I have occasionally been bought a hot drink at children's soft play party but I wouldn't say it was the norm and I certainly wouldn't expect one.

[monkeywithacowface]

Generally speaking people buy their own. If a host offered I'd happily accept but certainly wouldn't give it a second thought if they didn't. I have bought parents drinks before at ds's parties but usually only a handful stay so it's not expensive.

[maybeshesawomble]

The norm here seems to be that refreshments are provided for parents of children when they are required to stay and supervise. Once parties are drop and run (Reception onwards at DD's school) no need to provide refreshments for those who choose to stay. We are in London.

[RainbowCake]

I've never expected the host to provide refreshments for me at a softplay/football/trampolining etc.. party. Don't think it's ever been done.
I've provided and been given if in a hall type thing but that's it.

[Emochild]

2 children so 10+ years of soft play parties

Never been given a drink

[OverAndAbove]

We did a soft play party for each DC at 4yo; we did a tab for adult drinks, as - let's face it - you need coffee to be able to tolerate soft play. Each time it was only a handful that used the tab, and we had to remind people. People need caffeine!

[FestiveBiscuits]

I have bought them in the past and been to a few where they have been bought but equally been to plenty where I've bought my own.

YANBU to not buy drinks, and anyone shooting you an evil look is definitely unreasonable.

[Shenanagins]

Yanbu. Where we live it's a bit of a mix, some do, some don't but it's never expected.

[MigsSlippers]

I think it varies by area. Big jugs of coffee are quite popular round here. I would say a tab is not, but it might be very much the done thing where you are.

I've made a similar gaff by not paying for siblings. Paying for them seemed to be the done thing in my younger child's year group, though I'd never come across it in years of doing softplay parties with my eldest. Ah well, you can't predict all these things.

[monkeywithacowface]

It was frowned up on though when I served shop bought cake instead of cutting up the one I'd made for ds in my defense I was worried about how it would taste (pretty good as it happens) and we were having a family get together for ds in the evening so thought it's be nice to bring the cake out again!

Won't make that mistake again though!

[Yoarchie]

No ridiculous to have to buy adults coffees. I'd never expect party mum/dad to go an buy me a drink, although many do offer.

[MigsSlippers]

Monkey that's bizarre. Nowt as queer as folk.

[Lesley1980]

I've never been bought a drink or had any food or soft drinks provided for me at any party.