Hey, this is about my SiL and how she quite clearly is taking advantage of me, Dh, and the family and I just want other's opinions as I might be overreacting. Let me just say from the off that I do like my SiL but in small doses, don't get me wrong she's a nice person I guess and she loves mine dh's three children to bits but she's a nightmare too.
She is a single parent to three children after a string of failed relationships over the years. Her kids are 11, 10 and 8, she doesn't work but is currently training to be a teaching assistant at college. She relies on benefits as her main income and gets around £900 a month in CSA from her children's fathers (they all have different dads). Now I'm not benefit bashing before anyone starts, I'm simply telling you how things are with her.
As she's been single for years she has come to rely heavily on my MiL, FiL and my other SiL for help with her kids and she regularly (I'm talking every week) asks to borrow money. She has now started to ask me and dh to lend her money and quite frankly I'm gettin sick of it.
She is not organised in the slightest when it comes to her life ie money, paying bills on time, meeting up at a pre are fed time, she's always late or doesn't show when we've made plans and the last few times my kids have stayed over at hers (they for stay often) they've come home saying they're starving and that there was no food in the house. As well as the asking to borrow money she is also asking for us to drive her places, and this too is becoming rather a regular occutance and just because me and dh have a car each (we have no choice not to as we both work) she thinks it's automatically a given that we'll chauffeur her about and it's not on IMO.
She is frequently asking for me and dh to lend her £20 here and there because she "forgot" a certain bill hadn't gone out and she'd spent all her money. She has text the other day asking can I lend her money for the bus fair to college but I know she has a monthly bus pass! Then she's making plans to come up to ours to have a BBQ and a few drinks or come round for a family gathering ie birthdays and she cancels saying she can't afford the taxi fare there and back, well I'm growing a little sick of it.
She thinks the whole world revolves around her and whilst usually I'll do anything to help anyone I'm sick of bailing her out. She says she has no money but then spends money on wine and having her hair done, manicures etc but her cuboards are always empty. How do you think I should deal with this as if she carried on asking for "favours" in this entitled and expectant sort of mannor then I'm going to snap.
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AIBU?
To not get why she can't stand on her own two feet?
125 replies
EvaU · 03/08/2015 18:10
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