AIBU to be annoyed at 'girl' judging our family dynamics.

[madchocolatemum48]

A group of friends of a neighbour and I were chatting at a party over the weekend.
We were getting acquainted with the usual "What do you do?" "How many children?".......etc etc.
I said dh & i have been married nearly 20 years, 2 children, I'm a SAHM. Ended with saying "You know, the usual traditional family"
A young woman who had already stated she had 3 kids by 3 fathers, never married, pipes up " Fuc#ing hell, didn't know people still did that old b¤llsh!t stuff"

Is it 'old-fashioned' to be a traditional family now? Maybe she just made me feel old, but I wouldn't have made a derogatory comment about her family dynamics.

[Muddledandunsure]

She probably thought your comment was a dig at her.

[macdoodle]

"the usual traditional family" sounds a little passive aggressive/patronising to me, so maybe got her back up a bit. It does imply a bit that any other set hobos unusual/unacceptable.

[Haggisfish]

Ha ha-it's not unusual as such, but it's certainly less usual than it was. I'm a teacher and I'm actually more surprised when students I teach have two parents with the same surname who are married. She sounded a bit defensive tbh.

[CrohnicallyExhausted]

That's what I thought muddled

[juneybean]

You brought it on yourself with that wanky comment.

[Guitargirl]

Maybe she felt a bit stung by your 'usual traditional family' comment?

YANBU to feel hurt by her calling your family dynamic 'bullshit' but there is more than a little judginess in your perception of hers.

[WorraLiberty]

Even the fact you've called her a 'girl' in your thread title is patronising, considering she's a Mother of 3.

[NorwaySpruce]

Describing the woman as 'girl' speaks volumes about your attitude OP.

[SiennaBlake]

I think she probably picked up on the attitude you clearly have to women like her and felt like saying something.

[wowfudge]

Minnie - you know nothing about the woman's life to make a nasty comment like that.

OP - what you said sounded like you were having a dig.

[CaractacusPotts]

minnie WTF fuck does that mean? "Showing her upbringing"? How fucking rude of YOU!

I agree with others, she was probably retaliating to your comment whether you meant for it to come across as such or not it sounds very judgy and holier than thou!

[Gen35]

She overreacted, I agree in reckon the 'traditional family' hurt her feelings, still not ok to be so rude though. Just forget about it!

[Mumof3xox]

She felt judged by you

So she lashed out

[fedupbutfine]

my reaction to your post as a single mum is to want to slap you and make sarcastic comments about perfection.

You're not standing in front of me right now so I can only imagine how your comment made that woman feel. Non-traditional families contain decent, hard-working people too, you know?!

[AnyoneForTennis]

Wonder what else you had said prior to that!

[LoxleyBarrett]

Sadly it seems that she picked up on your dig at get and retaliated - can't say I blame her.

[thatstoast]

I think your last comment is ambiguous. I read it as a self conscious "usual thing, nothing more to talk about" wrap up. Other people are obviously reading it like you were stating that your family set-up is correct and hers incorrect.

She was being rude, of course.

[LizLimone]

'The usual traditional family' is pretty offensive, to be honest. Implies anyone who is not married, a SAHM or has 2.4 children is weird. So you kind of invited a response with your own comment. Although she was a tad OTT on her response.

[LoxleyBarrett]

Dig at her (not "get")

[LizLimone]

*in

[Mrsjayy]

You sounded like you were having a dig you probably were not but the traditional family sounds snide y she sounds upfront and rude though, btw not many girls have 3 children

[FunkyBoldRibena]

You DID make a comment about her family dynamics by putting yourself in the 'usual, traditional' bracket.