to assume dp will have the (ahem) wet patch in the bed...?

(209 Posts)
lottie63 Wed 28-Nov-12 00:32:05

Just that really. He always expects ME to sleep in it. Sometimes I would just like him to say 'Don t worry. You have the dry half'..

MrsWolowitz Wed 28-Nov-12 07:40:52

I either put a towel under my backside or quickly nip out for a wee to 'drain'.

I hate lying in the wet patch.

DrinkFeckArseGirls Wed 28-Nov-12 07:43:49

I hope you have a mattress cover underneath your sheet. hmm

AnyFuckingDude Wed 28-Nov-12 07:44:12

You should always empty your bladder after penetrative sex anyway....have a good mop-up while you're at it. Problem solved.

Never a wet patch if you just go to the loo immediately afterwards. Stops you getting cystitis too.

unexpectediteminbaggingarea Wed 28-Nov-12 07:51:46

when we weren't using condoms it was straight to the toilet afterwards. the whole business is disgusting.

honeytea Wed 28-Nov-12 07:56:15

I think going to the loo after is a good solution. When TTC you should try and keep it in though, so I used DP's pillow under my bum (poor man.)

Shodan Wed 28-Nov-12 07:56:57

YY. Dash for the loo.

DH has always done this and I must admit I found it a bit peculiar at first. Now I'm just grateful.

poorbuthappy Wed 28-Nov-12 07:58:08

Sex towel.

(now that takes me back grin)

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Wed 28-Nov-12 07:59:40

Two boxes of tissues, one each side of the bed. Shuffle and grab if you've ended up in the middle.

Bertrude Wed 28-Nov-12 08:16:20

I thought everyone just had a box of sex tissues near the bed to shove up there (well, not up but you know what I mean) afterwards?

And I didn't know about the weeing to prevent cystitis afterwards - I just do to get rid of the tissues and because I need a wee.

Woah - way to kill a mood...
'put hand over vag and run for the loo' grin

Sometimes a little wet patch happens. Tis life. No big deal but You should try and get him to finish on his side of the bed and no problem.

FlamingoBingo Wed 28-Nov-12 08:40:34

Sex towels (old terry nappies), the clearly famous shuffle-and-grab technique, and then off to the loo for drainage...of course!

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Wed 28-Nov-12 08:42:20

Doesn't the wet patch happen when you lie there in post coital bliss, cuddling and snuggling.

RatherBeOnThePiste Wed 28-Nov-12 08:46:50

Finish on his side wine
Otherwise shuffle to the edge of the bed, hanging on, pop to the loo
Sorted

fluffyraggies Wed 28-Nov-12 08:52:05

I don't get the wet patch till much much later in the night confused <wonders if i have particularly good suction up there grin >

By then i'm way too sleepy to do much about it.

I have a clean up in the morning. The sheets get changed twice a week. Now i think about it I dont mind the wet patch actually. Why am i thinking about this at 10 to 9 on a Wednesday? grin

FanjoForTheMammaries Wed 28-Nov-12 09:12:50

Could change the sheet?

Is that too boring blush

purplecrayon Wed 28-Nov-12 09:16:00

TOWEL!!

Get a big bed and fuck in the middle.

ours is HUUUUUUUUUGE

But the wet patch follows me

You can complete in his side. Shuffle into your own. 10 minutes later it's you who has created the wet patch

Can't you just make sure you do the business on his side of the bed?

HecatePropylaea Wed 28-Nov-12 09:21:25

stick a towel down and do it on that.

But yes. I have always wondered why so many men expect that.

Yes, my woman, I have just rocked your world. Now. Lay thee down in the product of my manly loins to honour me for I bring forth much seed and the patch is wide, a testament to my virility. I will rest and presently shall go out and hunt buffalo.

Toilet paper anyone?

My DH always goes off to get me some loo roll, it's like a ritual.

These bloody films where they have been at it for ages and them go to sleep all spooned up and lovely.....you never see them in a frantic rush for the loo roll or them trying to avoid the wet patch. Wonder what their secret is hmm

InNeedOfBrandy Wed 28-Nov-12 09:24:01

Um why are you all always on the bottom for it to fall out? I love a good ride cow girl style.

Because it doesn't come out straight away does it? It trickles, slowly over the next bloody day hour

InNeedOfBrandy Wed 28-Nov-12 09:29:19

No you get off and go for a wee straight away so no trickling out, and I have a fanjo that sucks water up in the bath and whoohes out after.

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