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When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Conception

We have enjoyed jizzidents and jizznamis. We are fans of having a rummage and we are getting all the baby juice we can to keep the bfp boom going. Join us in JS 59!!!

999 replies

ScottishLady7 · 26/02/2016 21:21

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

  1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
  2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
  3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
  4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
  5. Thou shalt not be offended by the word vagina.


JSing lingo
~~~~~~~~~

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also known as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a Kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit), or PIATLH (Tea light holder), PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage (Self explanatory)

ROC = Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Jizz in a bra = how we transport the jizz to the Sperm Queen

Shagging like 'something' = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into TTC obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband (or Cuntraband) = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing a Lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

Miroid - The male compadre of a viroid

Cat - Compulsory

Skittletits - Killer molten painful tits and nipples

Ghost jizz/goat jazz - When the amazing foof sucks up all the jizz - achieved when coming at the same time/nearly the same time.

The link to Part 58 is HERE

The current Grads Fred is HERE

The current Mumming Fred is HERE

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is HERE

The brilliantly pearl-clutchy Fred about 'how wooode' our Fred is darlings is HERE

Stats sheet is HERE

Recent research PROVING WE ARE RIGHT is HERE

We are the dark side of MN... Welcome!
OP posts:
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ScottishLady7 · 26/02/2016 21:24

I thought I would make a new Fred. Happy to procrastinate instead of pack for skiing! I hate packing...

Anyway, my stats:
Name: Scottish
Age: 27
TTC: Since October 2015
DC: None. Not even a dog. Not allowed Sad

OP posts:
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Kwick709 · 26/02/2016 21:46

Scottish thanks so much for taking the lead! Great fred title! I hate packing too Envy

Kwick
TTC #1
Did first IUI in September 2015 - after 5th failed IUI I am now on first cycle of IVF - day 9 (3 follicles, 1 @ 9mm - smaller than when I did medicated IUI which makes no sense as I am taking shed loads more drugs)
Age: 41 but I only admit to 21
I have just discovered that I do not have enough syringes and needles to make it through the weekend (for my IVF drugs) - any advice gratefully received on where I might procure on a Saturday.... HELP!!!

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coribeth · 27/02/2016 00:49

Umm pharmacy maybe Kwick?
Congrats corgi blimey what a load of bfps! Grin

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justtheonethen · 27/02/2016 02:51

Thanks scottish! I came on and panicked we were homeless! Star for you! Good title lovely Smile

kwick is your clinic not open tomorrow? If not then I would phone out of hours gp and get them to fax a prescription to your pharmacy. Have to say that's a bit shoddy of your clinic.
Obviously welcome to come use the cat syringes, I'll even inject but as previously stated you will have to pretend to be eating biscuits! Hope you get it sorted

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justtheonethen · 27/02/2016 02:52

Ah stats

Name: Just
Age: 33
TTC: Since August 2014 too long
DC: Furbaby, cat, standard

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Ditsy79 · 27/02/2016 06:17

Name: Ditsy
Age: 36
TTC: Since June 2015
DC: 1 DD
Furbabies: 1 black and white moggy

kwick You may be able to get some in a pharmacy, but I would take along either a copy of your med prescription or one of the vials along with you - some pharmacists are funny about selling syringes due to drug misuse (I am a pharmacist!). If you have the brand name of syringe and the volume (ie 1ml, 0.5ml etc) that is easier. The best way would be to get some syringes put on a prescription for you, but that's easier said than done at a weekend I suppose. Good luck!

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Kwick709 · 27/02/2016 06:51

In my panic I seem to have missed a MASSIVE CONGRATULATIONS TO corgi Star

Thanks just cori and ditsy - I unfortuantely do not have the prescription but I do have treatment pan, some needles & syringes and will take the meds with me and go to local pharmacy this am. I want to avoid going to clinic as it is a bit of a trek but that is my fall back plan.

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AliceScarlett · 27/02/2016 07:47

Alice
TTC#1
Cycle 3
Currently half asleep trying to stop my furbaby from licking my face.

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angelazul · 27/02/2016 08:06

Yay new fred, thanks Scottish

Name: Angel
Age: 33
TTC #1 since Aug 15, cycle 7

Was convinced the witch would be here by this morning, had cramps & felt really emotional last night, but no sign yet. I'd rather she would just come & get it over & done with.

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Ain626 · 27/02/2016 08:17

Yay, new Fred. Loving the bfp boom at the end of mine. Typical me, leaving everything until the last minute! Grin haha. Seriously though, congratulations are needed for corgi !!!

My stats:
Name: Ain
Age : 28
DC: just one ddog
TTC: since August 2014....

Its a bit depressing that I starting typing my stats and my phones predictive text knew what I was typing... Sad sign I've been here too long...

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AnotherRubberDuck · 27/02/2016 08:41

Name: RM
Age: 26
TTC since: Feb '16 (cycle 1)
DC: 1 JS baby - 8m old DS

Huge congrats Corgi
GX for a lucky Fred for all

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AnotherRubberDuck · 27/02/2016 08:43

Name change fail!! Checking in is apparently second nature!
Name: Duck !!

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ScottishLady7 · 27/02/2016 08:53

Yes sorry, in the new Fred excitement I didn't say EXCELLENT NEWS Corgi Grin Star Great work!!!

OP posts:
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ScottishLady7 · 27/02/2016 08:54

And hi everyone!

OP posts:
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CountryGal4 · 27/02/2016 09:31

Oops fell off the Fred. Sorry gals. Reckon this one is gonna produce a bumper crop of bfp too!

Country
27
37+6 with js baby
2 cats one dh and a house that looks like someone has robbed it

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ChatEnOeuf · 27/02/2016 09:48

Oops Duck! We won't say a work Grin

Chat Stats
Age 34
TTC: Let's say July 2015...
DCs: DD 4.4, here. DS 36/40, not so.
Fur babies: 1 tabby shorthair

Off to RMC clinic to see just how broken my body is. JSing in the meantime but night shifts getting in the way again.

Local walk-in centre or pharmacist Kwick. Don't reuse the needles - they will be blunt, and therefore hurt more and the whole infection risk thing.

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Kwick709 · 27/02/2016 11:21

Thanks viroids. I called 111 and an out of hours doc is supposed to be calling me to give me prescription which will be faxed to a local pharmacy but I have been waiting nearly the hour they said it would take so am getting anxious again....

Here's to us all getting our bfps soooooon!

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Tryingtowait · 27/02/2016 11:39

Love the name of the thread!

kwick 111 are awful, as a senior carer in an old peoples home I can tell you when they say 1 hour it normally means 2 minimum. Fx they get back to you soon, unfortunately things seem to stop on weekends :(

Name: trying
Ttc: 2
Cycle: 2 (soon to be 3)
DC: DS 3
Age:27

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stumblymonkey · 27/02/2016 12:26

Hi all.....nice new Fred!

Gx it will continue Ain's Fred's BFP roll!

Stats...

Name: stumblymonkey
Age: 33
TTC: DC#1...cycle 3 already!
DCs: Two DCats...Mimi and Nancy Fancypants


Currently trying to get the motivation to leave the sofa and do grocery shopping. Might have another cup of tea while I think about it. Grin

DP is at work and I am having a lazy day when I'm supposed to be grocery shopping, cleaning and sorting out our new and annoying mould issue in the bedroom

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Kwick709 · 27/02/2016 13:41

Angry my previous message did not post...

111 out of hours Dr did call me and I am now sorted - except pharmacy did not have yellow needles so have blue which are bigger (read more painful)... I am still very angry with myself for getting into this situation... it is like my brain is not working Envy

Anyway am going to encourage my medication to work and to get lots and lots of follicles that are strong and healthy Grin

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justtheonethen · 27/02/2016 15:41

Glad you're sorted even if not with the right ones kwick.


I have zero motivation to do anything today. Feeling fed up

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corgi88 · 27/02/2016 15:53

Great Fred title Scottish! Thanks :) and thanks viroids for the congrats. I am still shell shocked because our shag effort was poor, only once during fertile window (I think 48-72hours before I iced).ooh stats...
Name: corgi
Age:28
Ds: none
Furbabies: 1 naughty corgi
TTC no 1 since June 15, bfp Nov, MC Dec. Second BFP yesterday, hoping it sticks!
kwick hope you get your needles sorted. Medicines are always a right faff-on. Scottish enjoy skiing!

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stumblymonkey · 27/02/2016 16:31

Glad you sorted the needles kwick...



Just....why so fed up? Is it TTC that's getting you down?

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AliceScarlett · 27/02/2016 16:55

I'll join Stumbly in the war dance if it will stimulate all those follicles.

Sorry you're feeling down Just

I went out today and just saw babies and pregnant women everywhere, everywhere! I kept thinking "i wonder how many cycles it took them too conceive" Hmm

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Canters15 · 27/02/2016 17:23

Woooop new Fred!

Name: canters
Age: 29
TTC: no 1, now in fertile window of cycle 5

Having lovely time in Malta with lots of cocktails and jizz. Back tomorrow.

Given corgi and fuzzys success, I do wonder if less sex ala storing up ze jizz would be the answer?

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