The Mumsnet Nativity Play, Christmas 2006

(111 Posts)
TheMumsnetNativityNarrator Mon 18-Dec-06 21:55:08

Good evening, ladies and truckers.

The children have worked very hard this term to bring you this, so without further ado, here is the Mumsnet Nativity 2006.

*****

This is the story of Mary, Joseph and the birth of Baby Jesus. Along the way we shall meet shepherds, angels, wise men, a crotchety innkeeper and all manner of animals.

Our story starts with Mary having a very special visitor...

PercussionSection Mon 18-Dec-06 22:08:25

CLIP CLOP (on woodblocks)

(Slightly late for Little Donkey, but such is the way with Nativity percussion sections!)

RATTLEATTLEATTLEATTLE as I accidentally fall over my tambourine.

ThreeWiseWomen Mon 18-Dec-06 22:08:45

Right lets get this place tidied up....FFS straw is so yesterday.

TheAngelGabriel Mon 18-Dec-06 22:08:56

Er, thank you, Mary. <<wonders if Mary heard the Prompt>>

I bring you glad tidings. You are to have a baby.

But you've got to walk a long way first. With a donkey. And an ass.

<<looks round to hiss from Prompt>>

Oh, sorry. Your husband Joseph. And an ass.

ptmum Mon 18-Dec-06 22:09:15

Mary and Joseph had to go on a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooong journey ( waves at mum and chews sleeve)

Miaou Mon 18-Dec-06 22:09:26

billy's mummy <<<<<<<<ooooooh well done Billy>>>>>>>>>>>>

<<snivel>>

StarofBethlehem Mon 18-Dec-06 22:09:30

<still twinkling> (waiting for narrator to start bloody narrating!)

annoyingtoddler Mon 18-Dec-06 22:09:37

''BOB de Builder CAN he fixit. Bobde builder yesseecan...ow!.leggo..leggoo mummeeeeee..''

PercussionSection Mon 18-Dec-06 22:09:41

Ooh, are we on Away in a Manger

Tarambarambarambarattle

ptmum Mon 18-Dec-06 22:10:43

teacher pushes fed up joseph on stage pulling a v . small wooden donkey

MaryMotherOfJesus Mon 18-Dec-06 22:10:44

<<turns to face back of stage and puts pillow up front of dress>>

ThreeWiseWomen Mon 18-Dec-06 22:10:48

Pass me the Anti Bac this place is a disgrace......

MaryMotherOfJesus Mon 18-Dec-06 22:11:13

<<turns back looking lopsidedly pregnant>>

ptmum Mon 18-Dec-06 22:12:05

Mary and Joseph walk round stage 4 times looking at teacher who loudly whispers stoooop after the 8th time

SecondNarrator Mon 18-Dec-06 22:12:17

And so it came to pass, when Qu...
Kwi...
Kuri..
[starts to hyperventilate]
Quirinius

was governor of Syria, he ordered a census, and everyone went to their own town to be taxed

and Mary went with Joseph to Bethlehem in Judea, because he was of the hosue and line of David.

But when they got there the twonw as already busy...

SecondNarrator Mon 18-Dec-06 22:13:44

[looks sternly at innkepper who is picking her nose]

StarofBethlehem Mon 18-Dec-06 22:14:04

<twinkles approvingly at 2nd narrator>

ShepherdDressedAsBatman Mon 18-Dec-06 22:14:31

<<Enters stage right, as though pushed forcibly(!) Perhaps by a stressed Mrs MaloryTowers.

Glares beligerently at audience.

Mumbles in monotone''what is that bright star''

flops down at side of stage, legs folded, arms folded, head down. Sulking>>

ptmum Mon 18-Dec-06 22:14:45

Rat a tat tat
Rat a tat tat
No No no

Ther isnt any room and you cant stay here
There isnt any room for strangers


<<<< v. bad recorders...all car alarms go off outside>>>>

MerryChristmasPANDAGHappyNewYe Mon 18-Dec-06 22:15:06

Rofl

SecondNarrator Mon 18-Dec-06 22:15:08

[kicks innkeeper sharply on the ankle]

PercussionSection Mon 18-Dec-06 22:15:41

CRASH!

PercussionSection drops drum!

ShepherdDressedAsBatman Mon 18-Dec-06 22:16:03

<<Starts to sob audibly>>
Exits stage left, as though forcibly (!) removed from stage by a stressed Mrs Malory Towers

StarofBethlehem Mon 18-Dec-06 22:16:13

<twinkles shakingly as Gabriel has hysterics at not being on stage any more>

JollyOldSaintNikkielas Mon 18-Dec-06 22:17:03

Joseph Mon 18-Dec-06 22:18:07

<studiously avoids looking at Mary cos she's a girl>>

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