Am I crazy to be planning a natural birth for 1st baby? Reassurance needed please!

[missbumpy]

I've decided that I want to try to have a natural birth. I'm going to a birthing centre (in a large hospital so near to doctors/surgeons if things go wrong) and I'd really like to try to do it with just a birth pool and gas and air. I've been reading up on it as much as poss and I've been really encouraged by some of the books on the subject.

I'm not an idiot and I know that things can go wrong and I'm prepared that I might not be able to cope with the pain etc. However, I've had quite a few people telling me I'm mad for considering a natural birth and it's making me start to doubt myself.

Some of the comments are coming from people like my brother who doesn't have any kids so I take it with a pinch of salt. I've also had lots of disparaging comments from women who've had kids (and who chose to have an epidural) telling me that I'll be begging for all the drugs I can get once I go into labour.

Sorry this is turning into a bit of an essay. I suppose I'm just looking for a bit of reassurance from other MNers who've had natural births. I just need to know it can be done and that I'm not crazy for wanting to do it this way.

[Pruners]

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[kittylouise]

People love telling you their nightmare birth stories when you're pregnant.

Stick to your guns! As long as you go into it with an open mind, you should be fine. Had labour with just gas and it was fine, of course it bloody hurts but as long as you are as relaxed and comfortable as possible you should be fine. I found that walking about all over the place really helped (loathed sitting still), but if the hospital had had a water bath I think I would have tried that, anything other than lying on a bed with a foetal monitor strapped to me!

My advice is to read up loads so you are as informed as you can be before the day. Good luck!

[beansprout]

Not crazy at all - why wouldn't you plan it this way? I certainly did. That said, it didn't turn out that way and so keeping an open mind is never a bad thing. Either way, I hope it all goes well for you.

[flightattendant]

No, not mad at all. Go for it, really! I had my first in hospital, my second at home naturally.

First time was horrid, I hated it, got out as fast as I could!

Second time, though it hurt more (no epidural!) was much, much better.

It was as new to me as someone having their first child, because I hadn't experienced the whole thing the first time due to being over-medicated etc.

There is no reason at all why you need to be in hospital for your first

[BlueberryPancake]

I haven't had natural births but I would say to go for it and really believe that you can do it because, you can do it! Everyone copes with pain differently, and all labours are different but there are loads of women who give birth to their first child without pain relief. I have a good friend (in Finland) who has just had a gorgeous little boy in her bath, at home and she told me that the pain was very bearable. I've had complicated births but I would never say to another woman that she will be screaming for pain relief, that's just not a thing to say. If anyone makes comments like that just nod and say 'well I'll try and see'. We always receive unwanted advice anyway, whether it's for birth or bringing up babies. I hope that everything goes well with pregnancy / birth! Oh and if you can afford it, many people here recommend hiring a doula (birth partner) which increases your chances of giving birth naturally. BPxx

[bubblagirl]

i had only gas and air but no birthing pool people will tell you all sorts too many people opt for epidural but miss the actual feeling of giving birth i had dificult pregnancy and not so good birth but it was the most amazing feeling also my first child

your body seems to just take over and you begin to nopt register the pain as your concentrating on what you are doing it is truly amazing gas and air was all i needed and then didn't touch it when actually giving birth labour pains are painful but you do forget the minute baby is placed in your arms you forget the pain that is true

do what you feel best and the pool would be much better too as water is very comforting when in labour i stayed in bath for ages it really will be the best experience and dont pay attention to horror stories of others as all people handle things differently and every birth is different

[Stargazing]

hello! I did it, at home, in the pool, no pain relief, no G&A, just breathing and my horrible wide hips (knew they would come in handy one day, they've certainly never done me any favours before)
My dd was 8lb13, so no lightweight - and I have to say that it was a good experience. Painful sure, but never so painful that I thought "I can't do this"
I was told by everyone that I was mad, that I'd never manage it, that it was stupid to want the 'experience' of childbirth, and a thousand other negative things. Sod 'em all - it was great and I was so proud of myself afterwards, both for what a beautiful baby I had helped to create and for how peaceful and calm I had made her entry into this world.
All I would say is - make sure you have good support. My husband and my midwives were terrific.
Hope you have just the birth you want!

[Pruners]

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[Pruners]

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[aikigypsy]

I'm planning the same (due in November) and can't see why anyone would plan differnently, apart from medical conditions. I am planning to do it in a hospital, but hope I won't need interventions, just like to know that the medical support is there if needed.

[mascarpone]

Hello. I did it too - water pool for most of labour and just gas and air. I'm really glad I did it that way - I had such a positive experience.

If that's what you want to do, give it a try! It's not like you can't ask for more pain relief when it gets to it, if you feel that you need it. And you might be amazed (like I was) that you can get through it with just the water and the G&A.

The best bit of advice that anyone gave me while I was pregnant was from my friend who had two awful births. She said that everyone's birth story is different, what happened to them will not be the same as what will happen to you. And it's so true...

So don't listen to anyone else - just do what feels right to you. After all it's you that's having this baby!

Good luck!

[StealthPolarBear]

Good for you - I wanted a natural as far as possible first birth and expected to be laughed at by the midwife (as well as others). In fact she was more into it than me - when she asked whether I'd considered pain relief I mentioned pethidine etc, she said I should try having a bath and have some paracetamol if the pain got too bad!
I got through the birth with a TENS machine and some G&A (TENS only to 9cm dilated), so it's definitely possible, and I do think relaxation and having faith that your body can do what it needs to do goes a long way (although obviously it can only go so far ) I was prepared to have more pain relief if necessary but read positive birth stories and expected mine to be the same.
Like you say, you know things can go not as planned and you'll have plenty of time to change your mind if needed.
Good luck!

[Sazisi]

It's you who's having this baby so fuck em, do what's right for you!
I had my first with just has and air in hospital; 2nd homebirth with g&a; 3rd home waterbirth without g&a. I got a bit sick of being told I was 'brave'

[StealthPolarBear]

Yes keeping active also really helped, as did thinking in each contraction that when the pain got really bad it was at its peak and only going to get better from then.

[DarthVader]

This is the most normal sort of birth to plan for! And if it works out, I have no doubt it is the best way to do it.

Sometimes complications mean you can't follow your birthplan exactly, but why would you assume complications at this stage?

[southeastastra]

why would anyone suggest otherwise? (confused)

[Niecie]

I would have say if that is what you want then put it in your birth plan and go for it. Nobody can make you have anything you don't want and you will feel wonderful if you manage it.

However, be prepared to be flexible and don't feel bad, if in the end you ask for every drug going. There are no medals for putting up with the pain.

My first was not natural (epidural) but the second one was totally natural with nothing at all (no time - all happened in the a bit of a hurry before I got the chance to go to hospital). The natural birth was the best but I am not sure I could have stood to have no pain relief with the much longer first labour. But you may well be made of sterner stuff than me and your labour may be shorter. You just don't know which is why you need to be open minded

As somebody says just read as much as you can - knowledge is power and if you know what is happening you will handle it better and raise your chances of a natural birth.

Good luck

[NAB3]

There is nothing wrong with a plan. You seem realistic enough to realise that things might not go to plan. It is your body and you know your pain thresh hold. It probably will hurt like hell but a woman is allowed to change her mind at any time.!

[ArtistFormerlyKnownAsSOH]

I planned a home water birth for my first (17wks old) and don't think I received anything other than support- hv refers to me as a hippy homebirther, but she's a hv so of a different species anyway.

I did the first stage and had a five hour attempt at the 2nd stage with just a pool for pain relief. I did have to transfer to hospital but not because it was my first, the problem was nothing to do with being at home or in water, it was something completely beyond my control. I do not regret for a second trying for a completely natural delivery and would have succeeded had dd attempted to come out something other than ear first. Next time I will be at home, in water and completely happy with this choice.

I did some hypnobirthing beforehand which I think helped.

The only other thing I will say- and I don't mean to be negative, quite the opposite- is keep an open mind. If anything does change slightly or even dramatically, before, during or after the labour then embrace it as part of the process and remain as positive about any eventualities as you are about natural births.

Good luck to you.

[StealthPolarBear]

ear first

[TheQueenOfQuotes]

I hoped for a natural with DS1 - ended up with a CS (no labour at all), hoped for a vBAC with DS2 (natural as possible) - ended up with ventouse delivery and all the drugs they could throw at me on top of being induced (none of which worked)....

however -

DS3 natural birth, just gas and air and it awesome

[Blu]

The Voices of Knowing Doom drove me whacky when I was preparing for a homebirth for my first baby.
Take no notice.
If it feels right for you, preparing for a natural birth will help you whatever might become necessary later on (IF it does - the majority proceed without intervention, I bellieve!). 'Active birth' tecniques will help you physically and attidudinally - and make sure that whetever decisions you make during labour are ones that you understand and are a part of making.

I went through labour and 3 hours of pushing on TENS and a pool and felt no need of gas and air. I was very much part of the decision-making that led to us transferring for ventouse assistance - and I did opt for an epidural at that point - I just wasn't happy lying on my back. But my active birth preparation and approach made all the difference between ventouse and CS, because I had been able to keep my confidence and relaxation up to enable me to keep pushing etc. The mw and obstetrician were adamant about that.

People react as if a birth plan is like Fantasy Football - you write the script and expect it to happen. But that isn't what it is - it's about how you would like to make decisions and what your preferred options - including contingencies - would be if possible.

If you are at any point 'begging for all the drugs' etc etc, that will be your informed choice at that point - no points to prove, and the 'I told you so' folk can wind their necks in!

Congratulations on your pregnancy, and may you have a happy, straightforward labour and a wonderful baby.

[missbumpy]

Thanks so much to everyone for positive, encouraging replies. I'm feeling a bit more reassured again.

The people who are telling me I'm mad (apart from my my brother who just hasn't got a clue!) are all women who chose to have epidurals and all other pain relief going without considering trying to do without. I'm not knocking their choices at all and I can see why it's tempting. But, they all seemed to have horrendous labours (40hrs +, forceps/ventouse, complications afterwards etc) so I don't understand why they're telling me epidurals are so great .

I don't know why I'm having this mini crisis of confidence. I've been really sure about my plans for the last few weeks and I've been getting really into reading up on natural birthing and hypnobirthing and everything.

As some of you have said, why plan it any other way. Pregnancy has been complication free so far and I'm definitely "blessed" with child-bearing hips so there's no reason to plan for the worst (although I agree it's good to be realistic about the possibility that things will go wrong).

Thanks again everyone. MN is brilliant .

[StealthPolarBear]

Good luck!
Blu - we had a midwife we called the "Voice of Doom" as she was a misery

[WideWebWitch]

I did it too, good luck