To wonder how sex can be "unnatural" ;? TMI alert

(143 Posts)
PepsiCoco Sat 05-Jan-13 00:44:10

Been with DP just over 12 months, we only ever have sex in the missionary position. I have tried to instigate other things but he somehow manages to veto them.
Normally I sleep in his arms but last night I wanted more space and turned over to sleep. DP snuggled in to the back of me and used this as a perfect opportunity to take control and put DPs thing in from behind. It wasn't going particularly well but DP didn't move away. But just as it seemed to be getting in the right place DC woke up and needed tending to.
When I returned, DP got on top as usual and said "this is better, that other way was unnatural" confused

Zara1984 Sun 06-Jan-13 09:24:34

You need a frank chat with him - his attitude is seriously weird!

DannyUK Sun 06-Jan-13 09:22:56

If he enjoys kissing and cuddling, but always moves straight to sex, then try kissing and cuddling somewhere more public where he won't strip down straight away. (Cinema, perhaps?)

HenryCrun Sun 06-Jan-13 09:19:54

You do need to have a frank chat, as 90% of men are probably better in bed than this guy. It sounds like he has some moral issue with anything other than missionary, which is a silly thing to believe, so do tackle(!) this with him before it gets out of hand.

PepsiCoco Sun 06-Jan-13 08:16:24

I think from missionary to sex toy might be a little too much!

PepsiCoco Sun 06-Jan-13 08:15:00

12 months not year. Good god imagine that!

sashh Sun 06-Jan-13 08:07:53

Buy some porn.

Or if he can't cope with that then 'Game of Thrones' might give him some ideas.

Is he RC by any chance, or is it just his age. YOu said married for 20 years, single for 5 and 12 with you so 37 - if he got marries at 20 = 57.

At that age he would probably not have got any other message from films or literature.

Treat your self to a sex toy, something like an egg vibrator that doesn't look like a penis substitut and invite him to watch you use it, or use it when you are in the missionary position.

*sex! Damned iPhone!

Well, I had fab sec this evening anyway. We did it in at least four different positions oh and bumsex

cheesesarnie Sat 05-Jan-13 23:38:37

old- hilarious hmm!
hows that funny?

I think any discussion has to be done out of thr bedroom before you both get naked.

Is it your birthday soon (it's valentine's soon!). Tell him you want it doggy style for your birthday.

Or, you know, just say, 'can we try this way, I don't want us to get stuck in a rut?'.

AnyFucker Sat 05-Jan-13 23:13:13

I expect it depends on if you think JS and GG are appropriate subjects for injecting humour into one's own sex life

me ? not so much....

OldMacEIEIO Sat 05-Jan-13 23:09:20

oh dear..

look, if you are having communication problems, why not try a little humour

hows that AF ?

AnyFucker Sat 05-Jan-13 23:07:12

oh

erm..

OldMacEIEIO Sat 05-Jan-13 23:03:58

no. I'm not sure how to help with this one. So I though a little joke might be in order

many a true word is spoken in jest you know

gimmecakeandcandy Sat 05-Jan-13 23:03:19

You need to have a really frank and honest discussion about this. Don't lie - be totally honest or you will be miserable.

AnyFucker Sat 05-Jan-13 23:00:51

OldMac..is that meant to be helpful ?

OldMacEIEIO Sat 05-Jan-13 22:59:05

Tell him that Jimmy Saville and Gary Glitter liked to do the missionary position but that real men do it doggy style.

Just make sure he takes you to a street where you are not well known

ouryve Sat 05-Jan-13 22:54:55

wtf?

Has this been done yet?

Been with DP just over 12 months, we only ever have sex in the missionary position. He has tried to instigate other things but I somehow manage to veto them.
Normally I sleep in his arms but last night I wanted more space and turned over to sleep. DP snuggled in to the back of me and used this as a perfect opportunity to take control and he put his thing in from behind. It wasn't going particularly well but I didn't move away. But just as it seemed to be getting in the right place DC woke up and needed tending to.
When I returned, I got DP on top as usual and said "this is better, that other way was unnatural"

PepsiCoco Sat 05-Jan-13 22:50:22

I get that but 12 months on and I'm making zero head way on that one.
Despite over encouragement at the slightest change!

The thing is all Women are different. What works for one women won't necessarily work for another.
I think every man needs a little bit of training in his partner's particular likes and dislikes. My dp who is pretty good still needs to be shouted at gently told not to shove his hand down my knickers without so much as a kiss.

AnyFucker Sat 05-Jan-13 22:45:49

you see this lasting 30 odd years ?

really ?

PepsiCoco Sat 05-Jan-13 22:43:19

He's a lovely guy. I like other things about him just not that. He thinks its good. He looks in to my eye while he's doing it and thinks we have some connection or something. I'm torn between wishing it would last longer and wishing it would hurry up because it isn't going to get any better.

AnyFucker Sat 05-Jan-13 22:37:25

*fuelled

AnyFucker Sat 05-Jan-13 22:37:06

erk it doesn't bear thinking about !

too many women put up with shit sex

if only more would break free and find someone good at it (not those porn-fulled dickhead that think they are...)

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