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To think he should buy a new fucking engagement ring!?

(312 Posts)

I got a text from my ex fiance this morning saying:

"Hiya, this might sound a bit weird, but can I have the engagement ring back?? Think I may have found a new recipient!"

My face was like this shock.

I've not seen him for a while- since I picked the last of my stuff up- and have been distancing myself, but he didn't mention anything when I saw him. I asked him when we split if he wanted the ring back, and he said no.

Obviously I don't wear the ring, but it still means something. And what woman in their right mind would want a ring chosen by a man's ex and worn by her for nearly 3 years? I think that's pretty insulting for both of us. AIBU??

confuddledDOTcom Wed 28-Nov-12 22:47:36

No, I didn't, I was backing up Amber.

katieks, do you give back all gifts when you split up? I wish my exes had! I've spent far more than any one of them and never got anything back. It was a gift, the law says it was a gift, he didn't want it so she sold it. End of.

TheReturnOfBridezilla Wed 28-Nov-12 20:19:34

Glad you've sorted it. And found fame in the process!

Fwiw I would be thrilled to receive someone's ex girlfriend's engagement ring. Erm, not!

katieks Wed 28-Nov-12 20:11:58

This has made interesting reading. My opinion: she should've given it back at the time of them breaking up. Even if he said keep it, I would've left it there way back when because somehow keeping hold of the engagement ring mentally to me means he's always got some kind of 'promise' with you, as that is what it represented.

AmberLeaf Wed 28-Nov-12 13:31:06

I don't think Confuddled.com meant it like that OP.

I have reported my post.

That is the kind of thing I meant by unsafe.

I've done it, thanks, forgot about that!

WorraLiberty England Wed 28-Nov-12 13:24:36

Amber you might want to get your post deleted and then PM it to the OP?

I mean given that you've just pointed it out so to speak.

AmberLeaf Wed 28-Nov-12 13:19:26

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ha I suppose that does sound odd. I think I meant it means something in that it symbolized our relationship and that time in my life. And I personally wouldn't want an engagement ring that was once worn by my partners ex for that reason!

WorraLiberty England Wed 28-Nov-12 13:14:35

Yes but his relationship/non relationship is his business.

You're right, it is a strange coincidence.

Oh well, let's just hope he doesn't spot this, the show or the FB page grin

Oh and Worra, there was no real relationship with someone else, jut a woman he liked. And it actually was a coincidence that I sold the ring now- as I said upthread, I always intended to sell it (along with some other stuff I had knocking around) but couldn't quite figure out ebay. My friend offered to help me and we happened to both have an evening off this week. She picked the ring to sell first to demonstrate ebaying to me cos she said it'd be the easiest one to show me all the different points IYSWIM. Strange but true!

WorraLiberty England Wed 28-Nov-12 13:09:33

He seemed a little more bemused that you said you kept it because it means something to you but you couldn't wait to sell it, after he wanted it back grin

WorraLiberty England Wed 28-Nov-12 13:07:59

I think it just serves to remind us all to think before we put personal things in the public domain.

All I can see here is two people bickering over a diamond ring and the fact she's slated him here on MN and he's slated her back on Facebook.

The whole thing's terribly crass really - hence the interest from TWS.

But there you go...lesson learnt I expect.

Hello! I'm back.

Blimey- NO confuddled, of course I'm not reveling in the glory, I was JOKING! A slot on MW is hardly glorious is it? I was being ironic if anything. I think he's a tit!

Amber, Worra is correct, if I was scared or worried I would have had the tread deleted. I'm not- although obviously I'd rather he didn't know I'd discussed it on here. What does concern me somewhat is that on here I am on hand to defend myself and my decisions. I doubt the MW read out any of my posts clarifying the situation!

AmberLeaf Wed 28-Nov-12 12:59:53

That's your take on her thread Worra.

I think it was a shitty thing to do [linking this thread to the wright stuffs fb page]

WorraLiberty England Wed 28-Nov-12 12:54:54

I read it Amber

I'm quite sure she hopes he doesn't see it because then he'll realise she's been over invested in his relationship with someone else, criticised him publicly and suddenly decided to sell the ring now purely because he wanted it back.

If I were her I would think 'Christ I hope XP doesn't see it!' too.

But nowhere...not on this thread or the one she linked to, has she even indicated that she might be 'unsafe' if he saw it.

confuddledDOTcom Wed 28-Nov-12 12:53:17

Yeah, sounds like she's just revelling in the glory, don't it? sad

AmberLeaf Wed 28-Nov-12 12:33:50

Read her comment at 10:08am.

confuddledDOTcom Wed 28-Nov-12 12:27:06

It's one thing looking for what topics are trending across a range of forums/ Facebook/ Twitter but actually discussing one person's problems is totally different! Added to that that MW is a misogynist and hates mothers, he's deliberately calling attention to MN to have a dig. You post here for the people who are posting here to discuss, not for that misogynistic twat to make fun of you.

So who watched?

WorraLiberty England Wed 28-Nov-12 12:23:23

By asking that question you are comparing it.

And my answer is, it would depend on the thread entirely.

And read the OP's post @ 10:07:28

Does that look as though she's scared to you?

AmberLeaf Wed 28-Nov-12 11:37:29

I didn't compare this thread to bereavement at all!

I said would you agree with MW linking a thread from bereavement or relationships.

WorraLiberty England Wed 28-Nov-12 11:25:43

Leaving a thread like this openly on the internet for the world and his wife to view at their leisure, is going to get way more attention than five minutes on a chat show that's broadcast on channel 5 when most people are at work.

You can't compare a thread like this to bereavement.

The OP says in her first post that the ring 'means something' and in the second post 'it's in a box waiting to go on Ebay'.

If she felt 'unsafe' I'm quite sure she would have had it all deleted by now.

BumBiscuits Wed 28-Nov-12 11:22:15

Jezza Kyle is a better class of arse than Matthew Wright!

AmberLeaf Wed 28-Nov-12 11:17:46

Worra there is a big difference between posting on Mumsnet and having it broadcast and attention drawn to it on a national TV show.

Would you agree to MW linking some of the sensitive threads on relationships or bereavment? This is a sensitive thread IMO.

MW is an arse.

WorraLiberty England Wed 28-Nov-12 11:15:23

Bum some people call it 'lazy' journalism and others call it research.

If you're choosing topics for discussion on a show, it makes perfect sense to turn to internet forums to see what sort of subjects people are interested in discussing.

I imagine tons of shows/journalists look on major websites...TWS is just honest about it.

BumBiscuits Wed 28-Nov-12 11:13:40

BTW if anyone is selling old jewellery, I had a tip once that Hatton Garden Metals give the best prices. These people are who the trade use.

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