Just something that happened a few weeks ago which has stuck in my mind and I wanted to share it somewhere.
I was with a friend, we're both in our late 20s, and we went to buy ice cream and coffee from a kiosk. The young man who served me was friendly and helpful. He said things like "What can I get for you love?" and "would you like chocolate on that my love?". Then it was my friends turn to order. She is overweight and I suppose I would describe her as having a less typically 'feminine' face, and it was as if he completely changed personality. It was just something plain like "Can I take your order?" Maybe I am projecting and it was nothing to do with attractiveness but it's stuck in my mind, I am not sure if my friend even noticed it to be honest but if I was her I might have felt a little bit insulted.
After this I have been noticing a lot more often when I get served in shops or cafes that men talk to me in this way. Although I'm a feminist I do not mind being called "love" and "sweetie" in these contexts, but I obviously wouldn't want to be spoken to this way at work. I always saw it as just a gendered version of saying "Alright mate what can I get for you?".
(Not sure if this is relevant but I feel like adding that I'm not claiming to be an especially attractive woman - but being slim, young, with average looks and conventional clothing, I suppose I do fit in with western beauty ideals to some extent)
We all know that many opportunities do depend on looking a certain way or fitting in with beauty ideals - especially careers such as acting or modelling. And I've heard people saying "pretty" women get special treatment/freebies/favours more easily, but this is something I have not noticed in real life - only minor things like the one I described above. I guess what I'm really asking is if you have ever noticed differences like this in real life?
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions
'Attractive'/'feminine' women treated differently in everyday social interactions?
57 replies
TwoLittleChickens · 19/09/2016 11:42
OP posts:
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.