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Feminism: Sex & gender discussions

Feminist Pub 14: The Bluestocking, a place for feminist chat and feminists to chat

987 replies

YonicScrewdriver · 14/11/2014 22:56

Welcome!

This is the 14th incarnation of the Pub and is meant as a place to drop by with random thoughts and meandering chats, on feminist or other related themes. Anything you want to mull over but not necessarily start a thread about. Alternatively, flop onto the chaise lounges with some Wine

We have a pub goat, a feminist cannon for firing at crazy sexists and a variety of drinks and snacks. And stools/bar counters at female friendly heights. And a crèche in the back somewhere

Will link the last pub in the next post!

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JeanneDeMontbaston · 14/11/2014 23:16

Crikey, that was fast!

I am mainly marking my place, as I have been a bit absent lately. But I also came across something rather nice (it's written by a friend of mine and I recommend his stuff a lot, but TBH it's mostly the quotations that tickled me and made me think I should put them in the pub).

It's Dorothy Sayers imagining how newspapers would write about 'career boys' in a gender-flipped world:

quiteirregular.wordpress.com/2013/01/16/career-boys/

mimithemindfull · 14/11/2014 23:20

Thanks yonic. I'm so tired on a Friday night that I can't be bothered to out IRL. Lurking at the Bluestocking has become my favourite Friday night thing! I hope I can stay awake

YonicScrewdriver · 14/11/2014 23:36

Thanks Jeanne!

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JeanneDeMontbaston · 14/11/2014 23:50

No, thank you for setting up the pub!

Though you will forever in my mind be associated with DLS.

YonicScrewdriver · 14/11/2014 23:55
Grin
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AWholeLottaNosy · 15/11/2014 00:01

Hi all, gin and tonic for me! Am feeling a bit weary this week with all the rape and sexual abuse stories at the moment as well as all the rape threats to women. wtf has gone so wrong in the world that there's so much hate towards women? Just want to go look at films of fluffy kittens instead....

AWholeLottaNosy · 15/11/2014 00:03

I need to know there are still good men in this world...

JeanneDeMontbaston · 15/11/2014 00:07

Fluffy kittens are important too. I'm aware bra burning is largely a myth, but this is cute:

AWholeLottaNosy · 15/11/2014 00:12

Aw a feminist kitten, that's brilliant! Thanks for finding that for me Jeanne, made me smile. Smile

JeanneDeMontbaston · 15/11/2014 00:14

Any time. Smile

Zazzles007 · 15/11/2014 00:34

Aawww, I love cute fluffy kittens! Even better when they are feminist, bra-chewing ones Grin

kickassangel · 15/11/2014 06:54

Hi,

I know I've been MIA for a while - life got busy. Suddenly everything seems to be turning to crap and it's 1:30 am, I'm sleep deprived and in floods of tears.

First of all - my college course has just gone to crap. The last piece of work I got back was a shit grade, I hate the class, and I have been saying since week 1 that I was given the wrong advice when told I should take it. Now my grade is fucked, I believe that the teacher didn't even read the last piece all the way through, and I'm supposed to write 1/2 of my final thesis in the next 5 days as 'an exercise' even though I don't know what my final thesis will be on, and I have no books, adviser or anything set up. This seems like a shit load of work for no purpose. I've tried raising this with my adviser (a new one, actually a librarian, not a professor, because the last one quit suddenly) but keep being brushed off. So do I make a big old stink or just suck it up? Only it is suddenly all more complicated because:

Second - there's some kind of swelling/lump in my neck/throat area. I'm having a CT scan on Thurs and I'm scared about that. I hate CT scans. I'm scared about my throat/neck and what it could mean - potentially an operation to remove some glands, IF I'm lucky. Possibly significantly worse, although that is unlikely.

Third - my thyroid is fucked up again. This means that I'm exhausted but can't sleep, have out of control depression and anxiety, keep putting on weight and I'm struggling to remember things (words like 'table' can be elusive at times). There are people who never really manage to get their thyroid under control and they just don't live long. I've had this for 3 years and it still isn't stable.

So - I have 2 fairly significant (although only possible) health issues. I really should sleep, but I'm so upset about my fucking shitty college course that I can't stop crying. DH will help me with the college thing - he's v. good at these things. TBH I'm so pissed off with the whole course that I'd rather have a crap grade than write one word extra. I'm not going to go for an incomplete though as that would piss me off even more. I have 2 more classes to attend, one discussion, 2 papers and a presentation. Even if I do have some fatal illness, I'm fucking finishing this course first.

BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 15/11/2014 07:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FrauHelgaMissMarpleandaChuckle · 15/11/2014 07:45

Kickass - I second what Buffy says - get your extenuating circs recorded - there's usually a form to fill in - and that should get you extra time or even just consideration on the marks, if you don't want the extra time.

PrimalLass · 15/11/2014 07:51

Kickassangel - are 2 and 3 not related? I thought I had thyroid nodules recently but it all calmed down.

Novida · 15/11/2014 09:07

Hello- Newcomer to the Bluestocking here! Never noticed this place before and thought I'd drop in for a pint of Proseco. My reason for passing - Oddly woke up this morning with a fire in my belly about this hideous bloke Julien Blanc who wants to come to the UK to spout his sexist beyond belief 'dating tips'. Anyway, I was just looking for somewhere to vent and thought I'd drop in here before signing Teresa May's petition. Wasn't sure I would be welcome as an 'outsider' but one mention of fluffy kittens and I was in. Nice to meet youSmile .
Kikass, you need to go and talk to the head of department about your lack of advisor too. No offence to librarians, but at this stage you need subject specialist help as well as as extension date.

cailindana · 15/11/2014 10:44

I've only dipped into these threads but hoping to be more of a feature on this one - listening mainly.

Hi Novida.

Kickass - sounds like a shit situation. As others have said, go to the college for help. Sounds like American college- university level - is that right?

What's going on with me at the moment is that DH and I trying to repair our marriage and he has delved into feminism in a big way. It's a strange, difficult but interesting process. I am still very unsure if we will come out the other end as a couple.

JeanneDeMontbaston · 15/11/2014 11:22

kickass - sorry to read that, you sound really frightened and overwhelmed. Agree with the others that the extenuating circs should be on record. And maybe a complaint?! There must be someone you can talk to to check if this low level of support is normal (it surely shouldn't be).

I forget what your subject is, which means it's probably not mine, but I wonder if anyone on MN would know enough to be able to help out? Only mentioning because people have for me in the past.

JeanneDeMontbaston · 15/11/2014 11:23

cailin - I remember your thread! I'm so glad your DH is at least making an effort, even if ultimately things may not work out.

cailindana · 15/11/2014 11:41

Thanks Jeanne. He is definitely making an effort but it's hard to come back from years of problems.

I don't recognise your name - what's going on in your life at the moment?

How did you get interested in feminism?

YonicScrewdriver · 15/11/2014 12:12

Welcome Novida! Lurkers and newbies get first pick of the cushions - would you like white, green or purple?

Hey Cailin,glad DH is trying.

Kickass Flowers

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cailindana · 15/11/2014 12:20

Hey Yonic, thanks.
What's new with you?

YonicScrewdriver · 15/11/2014 12:34

New with me - have got DS1 a costume that I think will pass muster for next week's random fancy dress at school. Am not v creative at these things, much prefer doing helping with maths homework Grin

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cailindana · 15/11/2014 12:41

Oh I bloody hate fancy dress. It seems to be a constant thing in schools here!

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