Sorry, this is long! DP used to work with this friend a couple of years ago but not closely. He is unhappy at work and wants to go back to his old job, and this is being supported by his friend, who is very complimentary about his work.
Around three months ago, he told me that he was meeting this friend for lunch the next day and had taken the afternoon off as he would only have half an hour otherwise. He asked if I minded, told me I could trust him as he only has eyes for me, and that he wouldn't go if I didn't want him to. I was a bit taken aback as we have been together for years and although he has always been friendly with a few female colleagues, he has never met any of them one to one outside of work before. He gave me the impression it was only about work as he desperately wants to leave his job and she could help him with that, so I told him I was fine with it, even though I wasn't best pleased as I was home on mat leave at the time and would have preferred it if he had taken the afternoon off to take me to lunch. I commented on that but he didn't say anything.
After coming home that evening, DP admitted that the friend didn't have the influence he had hoped as she was being 'pushed out' in the workplace herself, so I assumed they didn't really need to meet to discuss work again. He didn't tell me much else about the lunch, unusual for him. Since then, his friend has been off work due to stress, both at work and at home. I know she is married but with no children. DP told me he found out because they had meant to meet up for lunch that week and she cancelled last minute. This lunch was news to me, he hadn't mentioned it before.
I know DP's phone password, so I checked his texts and noticed that DP asked her if she had wanted to meet up for a chat since she was feeling down. He also texted her on the day she had mentioned an appointment with the GP, asking how it went, and to contact him if she wanted to talk. This is odd for DP as he barely remembers anything, he certainly doesn't remember my appointments! The time of his texts to her caught my eye as well, 9pm on a Friday night, I knew I was at my sister's house at the time.
They had also made plans to meet for lunch when she was on annual leave recently but it didn't happen for some reason. He has sent her photos of the kids, and she asks him about them, but never about me and he doesn't mention me to her in his texts either. I have met her through work a couple of times, and she asked after DP, but we didn't really get the chance to talk.
Anyway, last week he mentioned to me that the friend had contacted him that day, told me that she was feeling better and what she had been up to. I had a feeling he wasn't telling me everything, and when I checked his phone, I noticed that they have made plans to meet later this month.
Why would he tell me that she contacted him and what she said, but left that part out? Should I be worried or am I being paranoid? Talk some sense into me!
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Relationships
DP and his female friend
msevs · 11/11/2014 14:14
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